Curly Nikki | Natural Hair Styles and Curly Hair Care

If you are among the growing number of status quo altering females with natural hair like I am, then you might recognize what a challenge it is to find a great stylist. Finding a good stylist is inherently difficult; finding one who doesn't charge an arm and a leg is another challenge.

There seems to be a trend in stylists taking advantage of women with natural hair by tacking on additional fees. I'd assumed that it was something that shops here-and-there were doing, but realized that this is a much bigger practice when one of my favorite beauty service providers, Ulta, began charging an extra $10. Their $10 fee is on the low-end; I've seen shops charge as much as $25 extra to wash and blow dry natural hair.

This practice seems to be unethical, and is offensive, at the very least. Here's why:

I think it's safe to assume that the extra charge is to compensate stylists for the extra work that they think they may have to do. While I understand this, it's an unfair assumption. If you're natural, then you know that "natural" hair can range from loose waves that are nearly straight to tightly coiled hair. Regardless of texture, a stylist does not truly know whether it will require extra work or not prior to doing the hair, just because the person is natural. Personally, I know that my hair is very easy to manage because it is in a much healthier state now that I am natural, than it was when I had a perm. No more navigating through split ends and trying to manage a tangled mess of new growth and permed ends. On the flip side, I know people with relaxed hair that is thick and requires extra work. Are they charged extra? No!

In addition, charging extra for natural hair begs the question: What is considered natural hair? Are these additional charges only tacked on for women of color, a.k.a. black women? If so—and I am sure this is the case—that is grossly unfair. There are women of other races and ethnicities whose hair textures are just as diverse as our hair. Why are we penalized, while they are not? Are we being "punished" for having curly and kinky hair? Salons will assure you that this is not the case, but it sure looks that way.

From a business owner's perspective, assessing such a charge is a slippery slope and raises many questions. After how many inches of new growth or months of going without a relaxer constitutes being natural? How tight should the curl pattern be before determining that the additional charge should be assessed? How can clients with natural hair all be boxed into one group?

Finally, asking natural clients to pay extra is like asking clients to pay extra for doing what stylists are supposed to do anyway: make your hair look good. There are no extra steps involved—just as with relaxed hair, our hair must be washed, combed out and then blown out.

It's a shame that stylists are able to get away with this robbery. Next time your stylist asks you to pay extra, ask why.

Winter squash becomes tender and sweeter when roasted and makes a great side dish for dinner. Try using kobocha or hubbard varieties of winter squash for this recipe which could be found at your local farmer’s market. You can also prepare the squash ahead of time by cutting the squash up to 1 day ahead and storing in airtight container in the fridge.

Makes 10 servings, about 3/4 cup each
Active Time: 30 minutes

Total Time: 1 hour

Ingredients:

• 5 pounds winter squash (such as butternut, buttercup, kabocha or hubbard), peeled, seeded and cut into 1-inch chunks.
• 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil, divided
• 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
• 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground pepper, divided
• 3 cloves garlic, minced
• 2 tablespoons chopped Italian parsley
  

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 375°F.

2. Toss squash with 4 teaspoons oil, salt and 1/4 teaspoon pepper. Spread evenly on a large baking sheet. Roast, stirring occasionally, until tender throughout and lightly browned, 30 to 45 minutes (depending on the variety of squash).

3. Heat the remaining 2 teaspoons oil in a small skillet over medium heat. Add garlic and cook, stirring, until fragrant but not brown, 30 seconds to 1 minute. Toss the roasted squash with the garlic and parsley. Taste, adjust the seasoning and serve.

Nutrition:
Calories 104; 3 g fat (0 g sat, 2g mono); 0mg cholesterol; 21 g carbohydrates (6 g fiber); 2 g protein; 357 mg sodium. 555 mg potassium.


The workplace can be an absolute nutritional battle field. With so many lifestyles and personalities in one place it’s bound to happen. Someone brings in a box of doughnuts for breakfast every Friday, or pizza at the bi-weekly or monthly meetings, or that big bowl of candy at the receptionists’ desk. And let’s not forget about the soda and vending machines in the break room. So how can we fight these temptations and still maintain a healthy lifestyle so you can move though your day feeling fantastic and performing at your best?

Let’s start by getting into a the habit of planning your meals. Now don‘t misunderstand me and think that I mean sitting down on Sunday evening and plan every single breakfast, lunch, snack and dinner for the entire week. This may work fine for others but a more practical approach is to take it day by day. Make sure your fridge and cupboards and stocked with healthy choices for your breakfast, lunch, snacks, and dinners. The night before pick out your breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks for the next day. If you would like a quick grab and go lunch or meal, then you can simply have leftovers from the night before. Planning ahead gives you more choices and keeps you from grabbing whatever is laying around (like the doughnuts).

We all know that starting your day off with a nutritious breakfast is vital with it comes to all day energy as well as weight management. Skipping breakfast seems like a good way to cut calories but you’re really doing yourself a disservice. It actually promotes weight gain and stifles brain function. Not hungry in the morning? Eat dinner earlier and cut back on bedtime snacking the night before. Choosing a variety of fruits, veggies, lean proteins, low-fat or skim dairy products, and while grains with your morning meal, as well as your dinner, is your best method for a high-energy day. Try including protein rich foods like eggs, nuts, seeds and dairy products to help of hunger more efficiently than a mostly carbohydrate meal.

When snack time rolls around, skip the vending machines and keep a stash of scrumptious and nutritious snacks for long-lasting vim and vigor. Combine complex carbohydrates with protein and a small amount of fat for sustainable energy. Don’t forget to control portions to avoid calorie overload. So start thinking about whole wheat crackers with low fat cheese, or apples with a tablespoon of low-fat peanut butter, or an ounce of almonds. Finger veggies (like carrots, broccoli, sliced celery, or sliced cucumber) pair great with hummus, just to give you a few ideas.

Everybody looks forward to lunch break (and for good reason). A major tip here is to avoid fatty foods and highly processed fare. These can leave you feeling sluggish and wanting more after a meal. Instead reach for foods close to their natural state whenever possible. If you usually dine out for dinner you can check out your favorite restaurants’ website before heading out. Most restaurants have the nutrition facts for their menus online and some may offer a healthy options menu by request.

Craving sweets? Good news! It is ok to treat yourself every now and again to a little something sweet as long as you keep the portions and calories under control. In fact a small periodic indulgence may help prevent binge-eating which can result from highly restrictive diets. But here are a few tips and tricks. You can fill up with fiber and still appease your sweet tooth with fruit and berries. Keep only single servings of chocolate and other high-calorie treats at your work station. Again avoid those vending machines and try making your own homemade trail mix with dried fruits, nuts or seeds and pretzels. Oh and be sure to savor your sweet treat!

Until next week,

KinkySheaPT

Have you ever seen a woman that you were in awe of from just looking at her? Physically beautiful, educated, working a great job, driving a nice car and/or possessing some other attribute that you admire. Perhaps it's the way she carries herself or the fact that she seems to be so powerful that has earned your admiration.

So many times we look at others and begin to feel intimidated and think "If only I...". Sometimes it seems that these people posses something that we do not, or are in a place in life that we would like to be.

A few months back I was telling my friend Sandra how intimidated I felt because I was meeting lots of powerful women. Some had their Ph D's and were heads of corporations, some were Vice Presidents of companies, others were Executive Directors of Non-Profits and successful business owners. These women own their own homes, drive nice cars and are very well put together. And here I am working as a field director in politics. I have yet to finish my degree and despite having the desire to do so, I do not own my home. Can you see the pity party I was beginning to have?

When you select your friends, you should choose people that are going to hold you accountable, and lovingly tell you when you are being ridiculous! When I expressed my insecurities to Sandra, she immediately snapped at me and asked what was I talking about! She pretty much chewed me out! She reminded me of the journey that I'm on and the things that I have accomplished in recent years. She reminded me of the successful businesses that I created, the records that I had set or broken in careers, the divorce that I had gracefully gone through, and how I had packed up and moved to another state in the midst of adversity and had somehow managed to land on my feet. She reminded me that I had once been homeless with my children and somehow managed to keep it together and still take care of them! She reminded me of my resourcefulness, my charisma, my bounce-back ability. She reminded me of the homes that I had owned and the ones that I will own again. She reminded me of my perseverance.

But there was one thing that she said to me that was so powerful, that it sticks with me to this very day. It was a statement that changed the way I see myself and the people that I attract to me. She said "Leisa, people are a reflection of us. What we see and admire in others is also in us! You are meeting these powerful women that you admire so much because YOU are a powerful woman!" She asked me if I had ever considered the fact that these women were admiring me as well. She said "you are meeting these kinds of women because that is the kind of woman YOU are, and like attracts like! Stop thinking that they have something that you do not have, and accept the fact that you are just as powerful as you think they are! Through these women God is showing you where you are and where you will be!" Talk about being put in your place!

Well, needless to say the tears began to run, not because I was sad, but because she was right! The women that I admired so much didn't posses anything that I didn't. I used to feel intimidated around women who seemed to have it "going on" but now I remember the words of my best friend and can sit with heads of state and know that I am supposed to be there! I will never feel intimidated again when I'm in the presence of great women, because I know that I too am great!

I want to leave you with: Know your worth and who you are! Know that you are a Divine being; an extension of God himself. Know that no matter where you are in your life, that nothing can change who you are! Know that people are a mirror reflection of us and that what you see and admire in others is most strongly in YOU. You are magnificent! You are powerful! You are valuable! You are worthy!

Never look at another woman again and be intimidated by who or what you think she is and remember when you see a woman you admire, you are looking in the mirror and seeing a reflection of YOU!

Here is a little GIFT that I want to leave you with. Its something that I listen to often to remind me of who I am. Always remember who you are!

If you have yet to try the Aussie Moist/Garnier Curl Sculpting Cream Gel combo, then you have no idea what you're missing! I haven't been this in love with a product combo since DevaCare One + DevaCurl Set it Free. Holy Grail status? Perhaps :-) I'm not trying to enable you guys... I'm just sayin'... all the cool kids are doing it!

I was *supposed* to give Kinky Curly a whirl last weekend but after reading your suggestions of trying it with the Knot Today leave-in, I decided to hold off for a bit. I resorted to the aforementioned combo and on day 3, my curls are still soft and fluffy, defined and relatively frizz free. This is truly a keeper, and at 6 or 7 bucks total for both products, how could you not try it?!

After shampooing, DT'ing with MyHoneyChild's Olive You (AMAZING!) and detangling with Aussie Moist, I rinsed my hair clean and got out of the shower. I waited until my hair was 70% dry, and then applied Dabur Vatika Coconut Oil to the length (concentrating on the ends) and divided my hair into two. I started with the left side and applied a silver dollar sized amount of Aussie Moist Conditioner as a leave-in. I then applied a pea sized amount of Garnier Cream Gel to each twist as I went. I repeated the same steps with the right side and then sealed the ends with Vatika oil, rolled them on flexi rods and put on my satin scarf (pirate style to help my roots and edges to lay down). In the morning, I released the twists and fluffed. I'm loving the extra control and the shine... I'm sure I'll get a full week out of this set!


In other news, Gia is a friggin' month old today! To celebrate, we took her to the NC Art Museum. Why, you ask? Because it seems that she has an affinity for the paintings hanging around the house, plus, the Art Museum rocks! I'd love to be able to tell you that she had a fabulous time, coo'ing at paintings that she found to be particularly awesome and thought provoking... but she slept the entire time.

Later Gators,
Nik

CN: Were you a long term or short term transitioner, and why?
Long term, I stopped regularly relaxing probably about 15 years ago but I was still straightening my hair by blow-drying and using a really hot curling iron. I stopped regularly straightening in 2000. One day I woke up and decided that I didn’t feel like straightening my hair since it was a long and tiring process. Now, I only straighten once maybe twice a year.

CN: What was your initial reaction to your natural hair?
In the beginning I didn’t like my natural hair. I always wanted a looser, (what I thought) more manageable curl with not so much texture. For the first few years, I always wore my hair in an up-do or twist outs because I didn’t like how my hair would get really big when it dried. I also wished that my curls were ringlets instead of Scurl pattern.



CN: How did family and friends react to the new you?
Everyone reacted positive. No issues there. Everyone was very supportive, I’m lucky. As an antidote, my 50 year old cousin recently went natural and did the BC. Her husband and grown kids hate it. I think she looks beautiful! She also made the decision a few years ago to let her hair go gray after years of dyeing it.

CN: What was your transition routine?
Just wash and condition using Pert shampoo/conditioner. Used this stuff called Bouncy Crème as a texturizing cream. I mostly wore up-dos and twist outs.

CN: Why did you choose to go natural?
I grew tired of spending two hours once a week doing my hair. Grew tired of being afraid of the rain and fog, of stressing out over my hair all the time. I wanted my hair to be healthier. When I stopped straightening, it grew much faster than it had in years. Not putting a lot of heat and stressing my hair out did wonders! I just let it be. I am at the point where I feel it's okay that my hair is big, it is okay that it when it dries it shrinks up just at my shoulders (because that’s what curly hair does!), it is okay that my texture isn’t as fine as I would like it to be. My hair is beautiful the way it is.

Happilycurlee writes:

Ok girlfriends, I've been perusing many blogs, vlogs, etc. and there is one thing that I would like to discuss with you. Whether you are newly natural or a vet on the natural scene, there is one thing I've noticed that many naturals have in common ... we are caught up on hair-typing, curl pattern, hair texture, etc. We have a bad habit of comparing our hair to other natural beauties. But why are we beating this dead horse? Can a Diva just compliment the next Diva's coifs, and move on? Another persons "hair-type" will never be yours and vice versa.

Instead, proper hair care should be the focus. We are privy to a plethora of information on how to properly care for our mane, regardless of what "type" of kinks you have. Taking care of your hair is just like anything else in life. In time through trial and error, you will get to know your hair more 'n more, and hopefully fall in love with it. You will learn to recognize what your hair needs by "listening" to how it responds to certain products. An imperative part of the natural hair journey is finding the proper products and a routine that works for you and sticking with it. Once you've discovered it, write down the routine, make hair goals specific to your hair, and work towards achieving them. Post it on the bathroom mirror for motivation and look at it daily to stay on track. You may even want to take it a step further and take pictures monthly to create a journal. Whatever you may choose to do, your hair will thank you in return by showing the results of being diligent with your routine.

Often times, we waste so much energy complaining, but forget to be thankful for even having hair! So let's cease this madness of wanting what we do not have. Focus on taking care of what is yours. Your hair belongs to you. You will never be anyone else but you. So begin by loving you, embracing you, and being happy with what God has given to you. Because, you are uniquely-you!

Hey Curlies,

I've been thinking about how I proudly state that my naturally curly hair holds up in the rain. I love how I don't have to run from the rain. I have noticed that there's another element that may effect my curly hair. It's the wind!!! I live in the "Windy City" and as it gets cooler outside we have wind combined with rain or just plain old windy days. I sported a braid out from last week Sunday until midday Friday . Six days was pretty good but I noticed that my hair was no match for a few days of wind. I'm sure that my hair would have held up in extreme wind if I would have braided my hair out every night, however I challenged myself to see how long I could go without rebraiding or plaiting my hair at night. I did rebraid/ plait after the first day, so in other words I co-washed and did a braid out on Saturday night, rebraided on Sunday night and then at night just placed my hair in a pineapple shape atop my head through Thursday night. It was windy earlier in the week, however I just tried to hold on to see how long I could keep my braidout carefree routine going. Well Friday morning came and my braidout was "big", and less defined when I began the week with a fresh braidout. In fact it was starting to look frizzy. After the rain and wind I had to place a ponytail holder around it to contain it during my lunchbreak. Yet, the wind blew portions of my hair into a dry puff that had strands sticking upward at that back of my puff.

I believe that I learned a very important lesson this week. If it's super windy, my puffs and curls aren't always super when the weather changes drastically. However a supercurly women can definitely come up with a hit style in the next storm. I believe that style will be a braided bun, or I will definitely rewet my hair so that my curls with behave. Now that's a thought for the supercurly!

CN: How long have you been natural?

I have been fully natural since February 2010.

CN: Were you a long term or short term transitioner, and why?
I would definitely consider myself a long term transitioner. I began my transition on January 05, 2008. I had been getting perms ever since I was in second grade and finally decided to end the relaxing after my hair had pretty much broken off from approximately apl to almost bsl to shoulder length. All of my life I had long hair and never had a problem with it but the trouble all started when I started college and the damage started from a combination of a new stylist who was scissor happy and having someone new relax my hair. I was always curious to see what my natural hair was like and was ready if anything just to get my hair back in good condition.My current regimen in to wash my hair with Garnier Fructis Color Shield shampoo every two weeks and cowash in between whenever my hair needs it. I then follow up with a deep conditioner (religiously) using Queen Helene Cholesterol conditioner, a shower cap, and a hooded dryer for 30-45 minutes...this for some reason is my favorite part it's almost like therapy for me :). Also every other week I will do a hot oil prepoo especially if my hair has been straightened. Following the DC, I then style my hair.I maintain length by using minimal heat. Currently I have been rocking a huge wash and go (I finally mastered a technique for my hair), and my second go to hair style is a twist out or braid out, and if I'm in a rush then a bun it is, lol. For twist outs I always style using a raw shea butter and evoo mix to seal my hair once my leave in is applied and roll my ends on perm rods to maintain the style. This keeps my ends moisturized and tucked away. This usually last me 5-6 days.

CN: Night time routine?
At night I'm usually too tired to fuss with my hair so I normally just retwist using water to lightly spritz and reset the hair and I take the rest of the hair and pile it on the top of my head as if I were doing a pineapple and just tuck it inside the bonnet. This technique ensures that I only sleep on the under side of my hair so my curls are safe from being smushed and all I have to do is shake and fluff the next morning.Patience young grasshopper, lol. The more you focus on the health of your hair and developing a routine the less concerned you are with the growth of your curls. That's how it was for me. I was so consumed with getting my hair healthy I didn't even realize that I had grown out my entire perm, I just randomly woke up with all curly hair one day.The best thing about being natural to me is the big, voluminous hair. I ♥ it. People are sure to notice you.

CN: Anything else you want to add?

Have fun and don't be afraid to experiment. It's a long journey so make the most out of it ;).....oh and do your research.

*I've also started a blog about my personal progress and I hope to start one with my bestie MahoganyCurls so be on the look out.

* My personal blog is www.beautybrainsandall.blogspot.com

Y.M. writes:

When I decided to go natural, I did it blindly. I just let my perm grow out until I had 4 months of new growth, a head of un-combable hair, and a lot of frustration! Instead of going back to perms I went to Google, where I was introduced to sites like Curlynikki, NatuallyCurly, and Hairlista.

My question for you ladies is: how did you approach your move to natural hair? Did you research first then dive in, or were you like me and just dove in head first? If you could do it again would you do it differently?

A little bit of breakage here, a little bit of breakage there - And that's how it starts.

"Well maybe a treatment will help," you think to yourself. After a few treatments, trims, a weave, some Dominican blow outs, a couple headaches, and a few pain relievers (need I go on) your hair screams, "Enough is enough, I'm going natural!" However, the look on your face is not that convincing. 

Yes, the idea of going natural can be scary and confusing. A laundry list of questions begin to ring in your head as you consider how the change will affect you. Of course, you see the wonderful pictures of ladies with healthy, natural hair everywhere. From the latest black hair magazines to GAP commercials, curls & kinks are in. But as you dig a little deeper, you find that there ARE even more options with wearing your hair natural. From a natural 'fro, to locs, double-strands, coils, straw sets, pressing, and the list goes on. Through your research, you discover the cool idea of 'transitioning'. Since everyone told you that the only way to go natural was to India Arie it, you're relieved to find options (there goes that word again).

The transition is either viewed as a wonderful inner beauty experience or a plague. This phase is only the beginning but the hardest obstacle to overcome. Unfortunately, this is the place where many of our sistas decide to drop out of the nappy race to Their Natural Wonder. But for the sistas who hang in there, put their boxing gloves on and go comb-to-comb with their coils, get a greater reward, confidence and higher sense of self to match that beautiful healthy hair.

This post originally appeared on Your Natural Wonder. Republished with permission.

LV Burns writes:

I decide to visit a beauty salon for the first time in two years. I can’t even remember what made me decide to do it. I don’t really give the cosmetologist much instruction on what I want done to my hair, I just sit in the chair and trust her instincts. As I’m sitting there, she brushes my hair out and begins to part it. Soon I smell a familiar smell that I have not smelled in over two years. This pungent smell fills the room as the stylist smooths a cool cream all over my head. Could it be a new type of hair gel?. Before long, I am sitting in a chair wondering why my head is burning like crazy. I try to think back on the last time I felt this burning sensation all over my head, but my mind goes blank.

The stylist washes my hair and styles it. At this point I reach up to feel what she has done. To my astonishment, I do not feel any naps. I run to the nearest mirror and see that my hair is bone straight hanging well past my shoulders. I burst into tears. “What the heck have you done?!” I yell at the stylist.

“What do you mean? Isn’t that what you wanted?” She replies in an irritating nonchalant manner.

“I never told you to relax my hair!” I am devastated. “How can I go around and promote natural hair, when mine is straight?”

All the other ladies in the shop are confused at my anger and tears, because in their eyes my thick past the shoulder straight locks are beautiful. I stare in the mirror at two years of natural hair gone in one instant. Fresh tears fill my eyes as I try to calculate how long I’d have to wait to have this straight mess chopped out of my hair once again.

Don’t worry ladies, I have not reverted back to a relaxer. I just wanted to take a moment and share a dream, or should I say nightmare, that I had last night. Believe me when I say, I have never been more relieved to wake up from a dream in my life. I could not help but smile when I woke up and felt my beloved naps.

After two years of being natural, this is the first time that I’ve had the famous “relaxed hair” dream. Although the dream was pretty scary to me at the time, I now welcome it because it helped me affirm how much I love my natural hair. Would I ever go back to a relaxer? Based on the emotions that I felt during that dream, I can answer with happy confidence - Never!

This post originally appeared on Natural-Ness. Republished with permission.

CN:Are you a long term or short term transitioner, and why?

I’m a long term transitioner! I have been transitioning for 1 year and two months so far. I’m a long timer because I feel like my head is too big to big chop (LOL).

CN:When are you going to BC?

I plan to BC at my 2 year mark, which would be July 2011. I think that is the longest I can wait. I’m too excited to have ALL natural hair!

CN: How did family and friends react to your decision to go natural?

My friends absolutely LOVE it. My hair used to be extremely long in my middle school years. I didn’t do much to my hair and didn’t get perms too often. Unfortunately, when I entered high school, I learned how to style my hair with heat, leading to damage. By the time I was going into my senior year, my hair was hovering above my shoulders. I knew then I had to get my healthy hair back and relaxers didn’t seem to be the best route. During the course of senior year my hair grew sooooo much and my friends were so excited, LOL.

Random people love my braid outs, I get at least one compliment a day on it, kind of crazy! As far as my family goes…my sister is an avid supporter, she BC'ed herself. My mom…she is not so fond of the idea, lol. I think she'd rather me have never gotten a relaxer. She isn’t too fond of my braid outs. My grandma freaks out at the sight of my hair -_- LOL, I guess she’s just used to it being super straight, neat and under control, like how she used to style it.

CN:What is your transition routine?

I wash my hair once a week, usually on Sunday. I either wash it or co-wash it, depending on how dry my hair feels. I use Nexxus shampoo and conditioner, and I’ll sometimes use Hello Hydration by Herbal Essences. I comb my hair while conditioner is in it, I towel dry and then section my hair for cornrows. On each section I apply Eco Styler Gel (for my edges), coconut milk mousse, Aussie Leave in Conditioner (or Nexxus Dualiste Leave in), and a tad bit of Olive Oil hair lotion for the ends. After I braid the section, I put a sponge roller on the end. The next morning when my hair is dry, I take out my braids and wa-la. The nights following, I’ll spray leave in lightly on my hair, moisturize with regular ol’ grocery olive oil and put my hair in a pineapple. Usually by Thursday, I'll dampen my hair with a bit of water, leave in conditioner, oil, and put in bigger braids, to freshen up my curls.


CN: How do you moisturize your hair to prevent breakage at the new growth line?
Olive Oil (from Publix) on my hair each day, lightly, and some Olive Oil Hair Lotion (the actual hair product). I like to hydrate my roots and ends the most, also the line of demarcation.

CN: What is your staple hair style during your transition?

I mainly do braid-outs. In the beginning I straightened my roots often but then I didn’t want to ruin my curl pattern so I decided I’d ban flat irons for about 5 months.


CN: Why did you choose to go natural?

Mainly because I was tired of my hair not growing, it was just so unhealthy. It STAYED the same length and I was annoyed by it. I’m so happy I decided to do it. It truly makes you stand out, makes you more unique, and happy! I LOVE natural hair. I just wanted back what I had all along. I think the phrase “you don’t really know what you have till it’s gone” applies here.

swoodward writes:


Hi Nikki,

My last relaxer was in June of 2009 and I BC'd in March. I had awful hair when it was relaxed. My daughter summed it up brilliantly - my hair looked good the day of my relaxer and the rest of the time it looked like "dry straw". At least it did to me. I received my share of compliments, but in the back of my mind I always felt a little like a poser. As though my hair wasn't real or that I didn't look like who I really am.

My hair was thin, broken and sad. I hated it in the end or rather I hated what I had done to it and during that transition and well after my big chop I wondered if my hair would ever fill out or if it would ever be beautiful.

I discovered a lot of natural hair sites and of course CN was one of them. Everyone is so supportive and encouraging, especially on CurlyNikki! I found wonderful styles and stories and recipes and I just squared my shoulders and took off. I began the journey of discovering my own hair and what it could do. I learned how to be gentle and started to really take better care of myself overall. Now when I style my hair, I feel a sense of accomplishment and beauty. I've been getting a lot of looks too and most of them are admiring. My confidence was way up.

Then today, I was in a natural products store with my best friend. The manager was really sweet. She seemed so helpful and friendly as she showed me all of these fabulous products - all natural massage soaps, shampoo bars, and particularly a hair cream for dry hair. The cream seemed interesting and was very expensive. She offered to put some in my hair, pulled a small curl and worked it in, then said my hair would just get better and better. Then she offered to put some in my girlfriend's hair. My girlfriend is a tall Chinese woman with a lot of presence and long straight dark hair. Not five seconds after the store manager started touching her hair, she started going on and on about how beautiful it was. I was instantly angry. I mean my hackles rose straight up. She didn't say anything about my hair and I knew good and well that it looked great. I had extra volume and it was big. My ends are amazing and my curls defined with just the right amount of frizz. It wasn't greasy... it was soft. Why didn't she compliment me?

It was really galling because I knew that my girlfriend had permed her hair curly twice, then straight twice with the Japanese perm and had dyed it multiple times in between! It looks great but her latest color covered up a whole mess of damage! It's not that I want to take away from the smoothness or beauty of her hair but darn it, when are people going to see my hair type as beautiful? Was her hair beautiful automatically because it was straight?

Has anyone ever experienced that feeling of resentment? I know I shouldn’t care but I can’t help it. AND I feel guilty because I admire my friend’s hair (I think her hair is beautiful too). But I don't want to take away from my own.

Hola Chicas,

Y'all know I'm a PJ, right? Although I can only use a few products at a time, I do have somewhat of a laundry list of others that I highly recommend. I've tried many of the natural lines on the market and most of the products available in stores, but the ones below get my stamp of approval.

Whether you're transitioning or a natural vet, this list is a great place to start if you're in the market to build a new regimen. My advice? When trying a new routine, figure out what your hair needs are, choose products designed to address those needs, try the routine for 3 weeks, re-assess and determine if you need to go back to the drawing board. Don't try too many new things at once, and keep a journal- - documentation is key. Take pictures of your results and record how various product combos work for you.

If you're starting from scratch, pick a product from each of the categories below (broken down by Brick and Mortar or B&M, versus Web Store). Remember, no two heads are alike, and what works for some will not work for all.

Every natural hair routine needs a good, effective shampoo. You can 'poo as often as you deem necessary. Divas that use heavier products, stylers and butters may shampoo as often as once a week or prior to every styling session, while the minimalists (folks that use lighter products) may shampoo once a month or bi-weekly. I shampoo when my hair feels gunky... usually twice a month.

No matter how often you shampoo, moisture retention should be a top priority. Even with the milder options listed below, pre-poos (moisturizing treatments applied prior to shampoo'ing) or deep treatments (moisturizing treatments applied following shampoo'ing) are essential! For tips on choosing a mild cleansing agent, click HERE.

-Brick & Mortar (B&M) 'Poos
Giovanni 50/50 (Target, Whole Foods, Vitamin Shoppe)
Giovanni Tea Tree Triple Treat (Target, Whole Foods, Vitamin Shoppe)
Trader Joe's Tea Tree Tingle (Trader Joe)

-Web Store 'Poos
Elucence Moisture Benefits Shampoo
CURLS Curlicious Curls Cleansing Cream
KeraCare Natural Textures Cleansing Cream



I love a good conditioner. I'm always elated to find a multi-purpose one-- a conditioner that can be used as a co-wash/detangler, leave-in/styler, and deep treatment. I gravitate toward highly moisturizing products, so know that most of the conditioners mentioned are not protein based.
Below you'll find a list of my favorite B&M and web store conditioners along with a key to share how I use each one.

CW -Co-wash
D- Detangle...(most of these aid in detangling, but the ones that get a D are the slipperiest!)
S- Style (because it has light to medium hold)
DT- Deep Treat (I add honey and olive oil to the conditioner)

-B&M Conditioners
Yes to Carrots (Walgreens, Target)-- CW, D, S, DT
Yes to Cucumbers (Walgreens, Target)-- CW, D, S, DT
Garnier Fructis Sleek and Shine (most drug and grocery stores)-- S
Garnier Fructis Triple Nutrition (most drug and grocery stores)-- S
Herbal Essence Hello Hydration(most drug and grocery stores) --CW, D
Herbal Essence Totally Twisted(most drug and grocery stores)--CW, D
Tresemme Naturals (most drug and grocery stores)-- CW
Aussie Moist (most drug and grocery stores)-- CW, D, S, DT
Paul Mitchell The Conditioner Generic (Sally's)-- CW, S
Trader Joe's Nourish Spa-- CW, S, DT
Trader Joe's Tea Tree Tingle-- CW, D, S, DT
Salerm 21 B5 Leave-in- S

**Giovanni Direct,50/50, Smooth as Silk (Target, Whole Foods)-- I'm not the biggest fan but many, many curlies swear by these for moisture and strength.

-Web Store Conditioners
Elucence -- CW, S, DT
Curl Junkie Curl Assurance Smoothing Conditioner-- S, DT
Blended Beauty Curl Quenching Conditioner--S, DT
Deva Care One (the old formula) (also available at ULTA and Trade Secrets) --S, DT
Oyin Honey Hemp Conditioner-- CW, S, DT
CURLS Milkshake-- S
Lacio Lacio Leave-in -- D, S


This is yet another essential in any natural hair care regimen. Curly hair is naturally very dry and deep treatments (applying a moisturizing conditioner with a heat source) help to retain moisture and health, and thus length. For more information on deep conditioners and ingredients to look for, check out THIS POST. Most of the conditioners above can be used as deep treatments as well, just be sure to add honey and oils to the mix.

-B&M Deep Conditioners
Aubrey Organics Honey Suckle Rose (Vitamin Shoppe, Whole Foods)
Aubrey Organics White Camellia (Vitamin Shoppe, Whole Foods)
Matrix Biolage Conditioning Balm (Target, Ulta, the generic version can be purchased at Sally's)
Lustrasilk Shea Butter Cholesterol (Sally's)

-Web Store Deep Conditioners
Jessicurl Weekly Deep Conditioner
Jessicurl TooShea
Curl Junkie Rehab Moisturizing Hair Treatment
Curl Junkie Hibiscus and Banana
Myhoneychild Olive You (very slippery and ultra moisturizing! my fav right now)




This is a less essential step in a natural hair care routine-- gels, curl creams and mousse fall in this category. The use of a styler often results in a more controlled, sleeker, less voluminous look. If you like big, fluffy hair, you may want to skip this step, opt for a light hold styling product or find a conditioner that has a little hold. Many of the products listed below are lighter stylers... I heart big hair.

-B&M Stylers
Garnier Fructis Cream Gel (most drug and grocery stores)
Aveda Light Elements Defining Whip
Aloe Vera Gel (health food stores-- I like the refrigerated varieties)
Jane Carter Wrap and Roll (Target, Whole Foods, Vitamin Shoppe)
Aubrey Organics Mandarin Magic Ginkgo Leaf and Ginseng Root Hair Jelly (Whole Foods)

**Eco Styler Olive Oil Gel (I've never used this as I don't like heavy gels, but I hear nothing but good things!)
**Kinky Curly Curling Custard (Again, I've yet to try it, but the reviews are mostly good. Just be sure to use a light hand and apply to soaking wet hair)

-Web Store Stylers
DevaCurl Set it Free(also available at ULTA and Trade Secrets)
Afroveda PUR Whipped Hair Jelly
Blended Beauty Happy Nappy
Blended Beauty Curly Frizz Pudding
CURLS Whipped Cream
CURLS Curl Souffle



Sealing the hair (especially the ends) is a key step in any natural hair routine. For sealing to be effective, you must first use a water-based moisturizer (a conditioner or cream that has water as its first ingredient), and then seal with a butter or oil. The molecules in most butters/oils are too large to pass into the hair, so they stick to the outside of the shaft, trapping in the rich goodness of the moisturizer. Reversing those two steps will lead to dry hair. Sealing has saved my hair and added a gorgeous sheen too!

-B&M Sealants (Look for oils that are cold pressed, cold pressed and unrefined)
Extra Virgin Olive Oil (grocery store, health food store)
Unrefined Shea Butter (beauty supply)
Coconut Oil (health food store)
Vatika Oil (beauty supply, local Indian grocery)
Castor Oil (Walmart)
Jane Carter's Nourish and Shine (Target, Whole Foods, Vitamin Shoppe)

**Glossers-- I'm loving silicone based glossers right now. I'm using one by Phillip B., but many of them have very similar ingredients. I also like Sabino Moisture Block. Use them as a second day refresher to add shine and control frizz, or one day one to seal in the moisture from your conditioner.

**Grease- Oh dear. Yes, Dax. The surprise of 2011… the ultimate comeback kid. I somehow found my way back into the loving arms of old school grease. My new boo, I use it on thoroughly conditioned hair to lock in moisture for days on end. It’s an excellent styler and the shine it yields is sick. My twist-outs have never been so defined. Remember, a little goes a very long way. It’s grease, so obviously, your situation can get greasy real quick if you go ham.

-Web Store Sealants
Qhemet Amla Oil Nourishing Pomade
Oyin Whipped Shea
Oyin Burnt Sugar Pomade
Shea, many other butters and vatika oil

CN: How long have you been natural?
I made the decision to go natural while I was in college and playing rugby (~13 years ago). It started to become WAY too hard to blow-dry and flat-iron my hair after every practice, workout, and game. On top of that, all of the heat started to take a toll (split ends, lots of damage, etc). At some point I decided I wasn't going to blow-dry or flat iron any more! I would just wet it, let it fall and dry naturally. At this point, I reduced my perming/relaxing to about once a year, and even though the reduction of heat helped at first, I was still processing my hair. As a result, the bottom part of my hair was permed, while the top part of my hair was semi-permed and it did not look cute, so I had a friend of mine literally chop off about 4 inches. The chop was for the best. After this, I went on with my routine of getting yearly perms for about 3-4 more years (bad idea) - I thought of this as a way to "maintain" my out of control curls. Also back then, I had a VERY tough time finding products that worked well, so getting this perm would help in some ways. I'm sure you can imagine - eventually these yearly perms also started to wreak havoc. I realized that I was still getting major split ends and damage, plus my true curls were being masked. Finally I decided I never wanted to get a perm again. This was about 5-6 years ago, and I have not had a perm since.



CN: What is your current regimen?
My typical regimen can be described as a “wash & go.” I will wet my hair in the shower, and while under the water I'll detangle with a very wide toothed comb. Then, apply something like a hair milk or light leave-in as a base coat. Then on top of this base coat I will apply something a little thicker (more creamy/fluffy, less grease-like), and finally will add a touch of some kind of gel for hold. Then, air dry. I don’t like to do the wash & go routine everyday so I will also rock a bun about 3-4 times a week. I’m a strong believer in protective styles.

As for products, I like to use ones that are 100% organic, or close to that. I LOVE Karen Body Beautiful’s hair milk and Kinky Curly’s leave in, Oyin’s Shine and Define is the BEST, as well as Shea Moisture’s Coconut & Hisbicus Curl Enhancing Smoothie, and finally the best gels are Aubrey Organic’s B5 and Moisturizing Jelly, as well as Kinky Curly Curling Custard.

I’ll also add, I have tried almost EVERY product out there. It took me some time to realize that these organic products were the ones that made my hair look the best consistently. Living in Philly has also made me realize that I need to change up my regime, depending on the season. Like in the winter, I have to make sure my hair is more moisturized than in the summer.



CN: How do you maintain length? Moisture?
Overall, I think the best advice is to listen to your hair. If my hair is feeling dry, then I'll do a deep condition or coconut oil treatment. If my ends look like they need a trim, I will trim them. If my hair seems to be too heavy or weighed down by products, I will do a co-wash or bentonite clay hair mask. Overall, I listen to my hair and I think that's what helps me maintain length and moisture :)

CN: How do you protect your curls at night?
If I'm on the heels of a wash & go, then I will put on a silk scarf and just fluff up the curls in the morning. Most of the time, I put my hair up in a loose bun on the top of my head. I think this saves the curls from getting damaged at night.

CN: What would you tell a new natural, or transitioning diva?
I think it's important to note that when you are first transitioning, you may not love your hair right away. But, don't give up! The long term benefits of going natural far outweigh the short term cuteness of a relaxer :) ... I also think that no two naturals are exactly alike, unless you have the same mama and began your transitions at the same time :) ... So, everyone's journey needs to be their own. Take the time to research what works best for you.

CN: What's the best thing about being naturally glamorous?
Going natural with my hair has pushed me to go "natural" in other aspects of my life, both beauty and health-wise. In educating myself about the benefits of using natural products, you can't help but to want to incorporate these benefits in more parts of your life than just your hair. Additionally, I feel a sense of pride in wearing my hair naturally. "Black is Beautiful" is the truth, so I feel like I am doing my part to portray that :)

CN: Anything else you'd like to add?
Gotta say, I think sites like this are wonderful and essential for us Curlies. When I started my transition I honestly felt like I had no direction, so the fact that this exists is wonderful! ... Also, my best friend and I started a blog a couple of years ago to help log our "Natural Journeys," so feel free to check it out! http://www.rachelandjanelle.blogspot.com/

Hola Chicas,

It's a beautiful Saturday in sunny North Carolina! I'm with friends and fam and enjoying a glass of Shiraz. Can you say... content :-) The sun and wine have me geeking, but I'm even happier because I'm experiencing a rare phenomenon- - 6 day hair. Wowsers!

What product combo resulted in this glorious event? On wash day last Saturday, I used Aussie Moist as a leave-in and Garnier Fructis Cream Gel as my styler. Evenings before bed I pull my hair into a high loose pony using a satin scrunchy and in the mornings, I apply a thin layer of glosser (Phillip B. for shine and frizz control, similar to Paul Mitchell... I just had it laying around) and pull the hair into a low loose pony to stretch it out and get it going in a 'downward' position. This routine has resulted in 6 day hair. Me likey. Soft, defined, not sticky.

Baby Gia has a ton of company this weekend. Toney, aka Aunty is in town to meet her new God Daughter. Syl, my younger sister is in town to meet Gia for the first time, and Queen is here, as always. I hope you divas are enjoying your weekend too!

Send me an email with your contact information, using 'Curlmart Winner' as the subject line.

_______________________________________________________________

Hola Chicas!

Since I'm on a gel kick, I thought, why not try the king of all gels... the heavy weight in the natural world... the infamous Kinky Curly Curling Custard!

I was not a huge fan of the leave-in (left me a little sticky) but I have high hopes for the gel after reading all of the rave reviews. I've secured a jar and plan to shampoo, condition and re-style tonight or tomorrow night. My question to you...

NaturallyCurly writes:

Nicollette writes:

__________________________________________________________
Question submitted via email:

I have been natural for two years now, but still learning how to work with my hair. For the most part, I wore my hair in braids during my transition period and only wore my hair out long enough for it to breathe before putting braids back in. I work out at the gym in the morning and have heard sites mention that you should wash you hair after each workout because sweat will damage your hair. Is this true?

I do lots of braid outs on dry hair and I'm about to style my hair in mini twists for the fall to protect my hair and retain length. With that being said, I will not wash my hair everyday and need advice on how to keep my hair healthy. Help!!!

Response from barbaranaturallyspeaking:

Congratulations on a successful transition and induction into the natural hair community.

Working out does typically cause sweating and yes sweat can be damaging to your hair. Sweat is the bodies way of naturally cooling you down and it's the bodies way to eliminate toxins. Sweat is also drying to the hair. There are some ways to absorb sweat, especially if you sweat a lot in your head area. You can wear a cotton headband to absorb some of the sweat around the hairline. If your hair is long enough to bun, it's a good idea to pull it back and away from your face to keep you cooler. You can do a conditioner rinse to remove sweat from your hair after working out. In the summer, I typically conditioner rinse if I'm wearing a puff. Like you, I wore cornrows during my transition. When I worked out I would fill a spray bottle and add shampoo (I'm currently a supporter of sulfate free shampoos when I do choose to use shampoo on occasion), and water to thin it out. I would then spray my hair with this mixture and let the shower run over my hair. Now that I'm all natural I would try adding conditioner to a spray bottle, misting the hair, paying attention to the scalp and then doing a water rinse. I would then spray on some conditioner, water, and oil mixture ( which you could mix in a spray bottle) and spray on as a leave in conditioner, or use your leave in conditioner of choice. I think this strategy would work on your mini-twists. If a few of your twists become untwisted you could probably retwist the few that may come aloose. I would then take a t-shirt and squeeze the water out by squeezing the t-shirt down the length of the twists in a downward motion. Another alternative would be to sit under a hooded dryer after applying a leave-in conditioner. The third alternative would be to take a hand-held dryer with a diffuser attachment with you , so that you could gently dry after working out. This question prompted me to plan a new experiment. My daughter starts her swimming classes again next week and immediately after she will be attending music class. I twisted her hair tonight.


If time permits I plan to conditioner rinse her twists and use a t-shirt to pull most of the drippies out of her twists. Since it's getting cooler, I may also take the hand held dryer to make sure that her scalp is dry before going out. Hopefully I will try this within the next 1-2 weeks. I will post the results. The good thing is that restyling natural hair after a workout is easier with natural hair than it is with relaxed hair. Now sweat equals rinsing and conditioning. I surely don't miss blow-drying hair straight and then curling after washing. Hooray for easier management of hair after a workout, for the girls with curls!!!!

Ms. Sassy writes:

I have been completely natural for almost 4 months now and I am truly enjoying this experience. I do not plan to go back to the relaxer! Anyway...am I the only one who gets lazy? Maybe its because I transitioned for almost a year before BC'ing? Usually when I style my hair, it takes a few hours to achieve my results, and the style usually lasts about a week or two. That's pretty good I guess, but sometimes I dread the styling process! Thank God for the pony puff. It's quick and easy. Maybe I need to go to a stylist? Are there any other naturals or transitioners who have hit a lazy era.