October 30, 2012

When the Bully in Your Life is You...

by Kelcie Owens of Spiraled

Would you ever go up to a complete stranger and call them fat? Or how about informing them that you feel they have ugly hair? Or, worse yet, would you tell them that you feel they have accomplished nothing worthwhile in their life and therefore are unworthy of finding love and happiness? Most of you reading this would most likely answer no. After all, they are horrible statements to make. Ironically, while most of us would cringe at the thought of making those statements to complete strangers and would consider any such person that would a bully, that is exactly how some of us may be addressing OURSELVES each and every day.

Sadly, there are many people today that suffer from feelings of inadequacy. They feel as if they aren't good enough, that if they just weighed a certain amount, looked a certain way, or if they only had these particular things in life, they could finally be happy. However, happiness is more than just an emotion. It's a way of life. In order to create happiness in our lives we first must come to terms with the things that make us unhappy. Some things, such as bad habits or negative friendships, are both in our power and beneficial for us to change. In other things it may be more important for us to adjust our attitude rather than the object of our criticism.

For instance, what bearing at all does our weight, our hair, or our status in life have on our worth? If you are measuring your value based on these things you are vastly short-changing yourself. Learn to focus on the things that truly make you beautiful and special, such as your values, your personality, how you treat others, and how much you mean to those who love you. Try looking at yourself in a different light, one that radiates from a place of positivity and appreciation for who you are. Perhaps you may find that you didn't really need any of the things you thought you needed to be happy. You may have had the tools to accomplish that inside of you all along. 

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