Less Judgement, More Love

There's about three feet of snow on the ground and I see a woman who looks like she needs help. But I don't help her. Because awhile back I'd decided that this woman was mean and my assumptions wouldn't let me move.

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How Did You Find Your Voice?

When you want what everyone else wants, without discretion, you do what you see everyone else doing. When you believe that what you see, what's presented to you, is all there is, you try to choose a mold to squeeze into, even if it hurts, even if you can't breathe, even if you have to cut off parts of yourself to make it fit.

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You are Fully Capable of Pleasing Yourself.

I was old enough to feel like a woman but young enough to be shy about it. I used to sit in my bedroom in front of the mirror pretending someone was watching me. Usually that someone was my crush of the moment or someone I wished would notice me.

How I Lost 10 Pounds and Gained a Healthy Lifestyle

Liv writes:

Hello CurlyNikki community!  I wanted to share how I lost 10 pounds, maintained it for over a year, gained muscle, and trimmed my waist down simply by living a healthy lifestyle! With motivation, determination and discipline anything is possible!


When 'I'm not ready' really means, 'I'm not worthy'

Do you know how it feels to want something so badly that you dread it?

I'm talking about pushing away the very thing you want most, the very life you want most. Because deep down you don't believe that you can have it. Because you've romanticized it and your expectations have gotten so high that you are afraid you'll mess it up. And what will you have to give up to get it? There's so much uncertainty, so many questions. It seems unattainable so you pretend you don't want it. You talk yourself out of it. You see it coming and you run. All of this is disguised in a common escape:

'I'm not ready.'

Sometimes what we say is 'I'm not ready' but what we whisper is 'I'm not worthy.'

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why can't we talk about sadness?

I think the sadness started with my first awareness that my mother was sick. It meant that everything safe and beautiful was also tragic and temporary. All of my life has been about coping with that.

Sadness lives underneath my skin. It sits in my stomach and my throat and right behind my eyes. It is one of my favorite things to write about, but I don't talk about it much because I find that most people aren't comfortable with the topic. We are all coping with something. I actually think it feels good to talk about it. Sadness is one of those intimate and inevitable things like sexuality. I mean, I don't care who you are, you get sad sometimes, but you might be shy about openly talking about it. I’m not. I think we should talk about it more. It's an important part of a vivid life.

Sadness is not the same thing as depression.

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