Nooooooo…not like that. You see, after reviewing one of Tyra’s hair episodes, I got to thinking about our beautiful children. The saddest segment of the whole show was the part about the little girls expressing disgust for their own natural hair. I work with middle school children and I hear comments about “good hair vs nappy hair” all the time. ALL THE TIME! When I had my twists, there was a 7th grader that also had some kinky twists. I told her how cute they were and she said she was thinking about going natural. But as soon as they came out, she got a perm. She said she just couldn’t handle the nappy mess. What can I say? I was not able to even think about returning to natural either at such a crucial time in my identity development, where peers and social pressures overwhelm you to conform. It’s ok, maybe one day she will at least give herself the chance to explore it….
that is dumb
We have to let our girls learn how to care for their natural hair. Its so unfair to relax their hair and not let them have any idea what their real texture is. I know that some people might argue that their child's hair is "unmanageable" and a perm is a solution to their problem. With all the information out there on the internet – rollersets, flatirons, gels, natural products designed for our hair, curlformers – people need to educate themselves on the alternative solutions that aren't permanent and go against the norm.
This is one of the reasons why I am transitioning…I do not want my kids hating there hair, I want to be an example for them.
My daughter is definitely one of the reason's I chose to go natural. I had been relaxed until middle school. When I decided to go natural last year she was 2 and her texture was starting to change. So I began to search for hair care that would work for both of us. She is 3 now and is sitting under the dryer right now with perm rods in her hair and she is loving it. She enjoys getting her hair done and I hope with me being natural too she will embrace her curls and not get a relaxer like I did.
love to see kids with curls and get sad when I see them w/ relaxers & weaves. Like, "adults, what are we doing here?" I think of my 8 yr old self crying because I didnt want the foreign junk (perm) in my hair but got it anyway. Great words of wisdom. My two child hair idols: Yara Shahidi and Jaden Smith
My transition wasn't just about my hair, it was about my life. I began transitioning before I found out we were pregnant with our son because we were trying to live a healthier lifestyle overall and I knew those chemicals were no good for me. I think it was one of the best choices I've made in my life. I can only imagine how jacked up my hair could've been if I had continued to use a relaxer throughout my pregnancy. I experienced post partum shedding pretty bad and I'm sure it would've been made worse if I had continued the creamy crack. Not only that I was very cautious of what I put on and in my body even more because I was carrying my son. I was researching EVERYTHING.
Our babies are beautiful no matter what the texture, color, or length of hair that grows out of their scalp and we need to make sure as parents, siblings,sisters,cousins,etc that we tell them just HOW beautiful. 🙂
I truly believe that self-esteem carries over into how children approach their education. If they don't feel good about themselves, they don't try as hard or they don't think they can do some things. It's very important that parents and other family members encourage and build up the children and let them know that their natural beauty IS in fact beautiful. That will help a lot. I hope more parents are realizing this.
I totally agree!! This was one of the reasons I made the decision to transition to being natural myself. I have an almost 2 year old daughter with tightly coiled coarse hair. What better way to help her embrace her natural beauty and learn about natural hair itself, than to become a natural?? So everytime I am doing my daughters hair (when stretched down to the middle of her back…yes, I know) I think of why I am transitioning and how gorgeous natural hair can be when taken care of with some TLC…Love this post!!!! I agree with Jace also I am trying to set a good example for my daughter that what God made you with is just fine…
Prior to having my son, I was back & forth between relaxers & natural hair. My hair was just an accessory to me then. But now, knowing that young men learn what beauty is from looking at the most important woman in their lives, I could never, ever again, commit to relaxing my hair & basically setting an example to my son that a black woman’s hair is not good enough in its natural state. Best decision I’ve ever made. Children learn what they live. It’s up to you to set the best example possible!
Can't wait to watch the video (i'm at work atm). Thanks for sharing this article. Your passion for your work and kids comes across in a refreshing and endearing way. I'm glad to know we still have teachers like you.
I don't have children yet, but I have a niece with cute curly hair and I hope to be a good influence for her. I hope that my natural hair journey has a positive impact on her. Who knows, maybe someday she'll call her aunty for curly hair advice. . .
No video. 🙁
It says the video has been removed by the user.