Hi Nikki,
I have been wanting to write to you for the longest time about my knowledge and experience with my Natural Hair. But something took place recently that made me think, enough is enough I need to sit on the couch over at CurlyNikki’s place and vent about HAIR PROFILING. First I will share with you the recent incident that took place. I was in the mall last week heading back to work from my break when two black guys were walking towards me. I knew in my head that these guys were going to try to pick me up or at the very least, say something to me… so I tried hard not to make any eye contact. As I got closer I started walking faster and I guess one of the guys realized he wasn’t getting any play that day. Instead of walking by with no acknowledgment, he chose to blurt out the most ignorant thing. Hypocritically he asked, “did you comb you’re hair today?” After hearing that I had to look at him in disgust and wonder… did you?… as his hair was so jacked up and messy… I was in disbelief that that question was even meant for me. I did not want him to ruin my day so I just kept it moving. In my opinion my hair was looking FANTABULOUS!
It just goes to show you how ignorant some people can be. The fact that he believed because my hair was in its most natural state, that it was not styled was absurd. Looking back at the situation I am trying not to make assumptions, however maybe if my hair was straight he may not have responded in such a way. I know there are many women that have experienced a similar situation– women that have fallen victim to Hair Profiling because of how we choose to wear our hair. For example, women with locs may be mistaken as rastafarian, vegetarian, weed smoking people. Or women with big flowy curls blowing in the wind curls are judged as being mixed or with a “good grade of hair” and the list goes on. If you are a victim of Hair Profiling, my advice would be to not be discouraged about who you are as a person. Understand that our hair does not define who we are as a person and when someone is being IGNORant simply and firmly IGNORe. Continue to love the hair you’re in.
Thank you Curly Nikki for providing a space for Naturalistas and Naturalistos… I am going to try my hardest to write more content for your amazing site. I am currently blogging (for the Canadians) and Hair Profiling will be an on-going topic.
Hair profiling is real!!! lol I definitely feared people thinking once I went natural that I was a lesbian (see how these things get ingrained into us?!), and on one of my first trips out with my natural hair, I experienced this lady being a little extra friendly with me… I mean, maybe she just thought I was cute, but I definitely felt like it was my hair lol.
It's so silly how we (and I do mean everyone) practice profiling of all types, but it is definitely real!
oh, and btw: that dude was lame for trying that put down. I would have laughed loudly and kept walking, making sure to switch my hips a little harder as I walked away!
lol at the prison and gangbanger comment
What a weak "put down"! His ego was hurt. If it wasnt your hair, he would have found something else, anything else to try an get under your skin…your outfit, your face, anything and try to make fun. People like that just expose themselves as the insecure, know-nothings that they really are. Keep on steppin' girl!
Your hair looks great!!! Keep doing your thing!
Hair Profiling – I LOVE this term! it's a trip. When I first BC'd, I had super-short hair like Solange's current do, and many people assumed I was a lesbian. LOL!
most guys cant stand rejection and his intial reaction was to try and see if he could get with you, but when they seen that they had no chance immediately they put their guard up. He became defensive and if you played him the most common thing to do is try to make the person who played you feel bad. Thank you for the encouraging hair & words!!! 🙂
LOL @ female gangbanger! I actually harbor that same stereotype… one of the main reasons you'll never see me leave the house with cornrows (the other reason is that I can't do them!).
Maybe we should all push our comfort levels more and wear styles we normally wouldn't wear due to our hangups and hair profiling!
Great write up… so true! I've got one for you… I love wearing my hair in flat twists or inverted cornrows to the back. Not only is it a great protective style, but I even like it as a dress up style. It's like a sleek, elegant updo… with a "twist" (literally!). Anyway, because of stereotyping or hair profiling every time I wear the style I'm afraid some people may think I was recently release from woman's prison or that I'm a female gangbanger! Thank goodness I'm able to shake it off and keep on steppin" Thank you Nikki for this great place to connect, share and support!