Jessica writes:
Hi Nikki,
Nikki writes:
While y’all are at it, lol, I’ve got a question of my own!
I know this may sound vain and probably a bit ridiculous, but I want to somehow manage to maintain my sexy while in the delivery room. I’m aware that I’ll be in immense pain, sweaty, and delirious. Hell, last week the nurse told me that I’ll more than likely poop on the table (apparently I’ll be utilizing the same group of muscles). Clearly it won’t be one of my shining moments, lol.
Despite the sweat, poop and fatigue, I’d still like to look presentable! There will be tons of pics taken shortly after the birth (that I’m sure will mysteriously surface on Facebook thanks to my dad and sister), and more important, my baby will be seeing me for the first time… I don’t wanna scare my baby!
I’m getting a pedicure since I’ll be seeing a lot of my feet that day as well, but what should I do about this head? Right now I’m thinking high, messy bun with a goody band. IDK… I probably won’t care at that point, but it’ll definitely help ease my anxiety up until D Day (by giving me something else to think about!)
Later Gators,
Nik
I second the high bun with the head band. Next time I give birth, that is what I'm doing. My hair was flat-ironed when I went into labor and by the time I gave birth it had curled up into a poof ball!
Hey Nikki- My two cents on the birth hair. I agree with the earlier post that it depends on how you plan on giving birth. And I can totally relate…I wanted to be all beautiful earth mother giving birth and unfortunately I looked like a crazy wild woman with tons of pictures from family and friends to prove it! 🙂 My first birth I wanted and did all natural. And after a bath at home, a shower at the hospital, working with a doula and hours of labor my 3c/4a/4b thick, thick hair was a mess. I had that bun ripped out so fast. If that is your plan then definitely wear twists or braids. If you are going for an epidural then do a bun. My second birth was induced and I couldn't hang and an epidural was a piece of cake. I had locs at the time and looked great! Both births were wonderful in their own way, and when my babies came I truly realized what a miracle the whole process is. But I still wished I looked cute for the first picture! tee hee. All the best and many blessings.
PS: For the new moms…I suggest two stand twists, or dressing up buns. Sleep is way more important than looking cute. And you aren't in the pictures anyway. I don't think I have more than 10 picture of myself after 2001…they are all of my kids & hubby.
LOL if you don't eat anything prior to delivery there will be no pooping (that doesn't happen to everyone). I didn't even feel like eating within the days leading up to my delivery so there wasn't much in my stomach and when I tried to eat I couldn't keep it down. I think your best bet would be to do braids or twists because you more than likely wouldn't want to deal with your hair once the baby is here. You'll be too busy doting over baby girl =) I wore braids the first few months after delivery (I actually had my hair braided while I was in labor SMH).
I just gave birth on May 27th and let me tell you I had no time to do anything with my hair. I actually had a do-rag on my head when I started having contractions and wore it all the way to the hospital. I agree with the others that said you don't care what you look like while experiencing contractions but I do wish I looked better now that I see the pics. I had twists in my head so I took them out in the delivery room for a twist-out. I thought I would have plenty of time since this was my first but my labor was pretty fast, so not the cutest twist-out in the world. Also, I was worried about the poop too. My girlfriend told me to take prune juice shots, but I didn't have time. When you're in the moment, you can care less about all of that.
Hey Nikki,
I just gave birth to a baby girl 6 wks ago. I'm still transitioning so i did a soft flexi rod set. I didn't sweat, but I was EXTREMELY and UNCONTROLLABLY shiny after lol (I have really dry skin). So I would suggest some rice paper and/or face cleansing wipes. If you are going all natural -birthwise, I also suggest taking showers while you're in labor…which means my vote is for the princess leia buns. Just in case a contraction sends your head under the shower stream :). Have those face wipes on your hospital tray!
Jessica,
Flexi Rods are my new found best friend! Sometimes I don't wash my hair up to 3/4 weeks…when I straighten it. My flexi rod sets last the entire time with very little upkeep. I just put a pinch of 'Coconut Milk Split Ends Mender' by Organix (walmart) on each section of hair I'm rolling. It's weightless and has tons of swang. I'm not proud of this but I haven't washed my hair and it still looks and smells delicious. You get tons of flexibility. If i want my hair straight i use about 4/5 rods…wavy about 10 flexirods. I can wear half up half down, ponytail, bun, whatever. Good luck
To Jessica..Wash and goes. At least that is my plan cause I just cant and I wont. This is my second and I know Im going to be beat!!! Gonna invest in a big jar of Kinky Curly and work it out from there…Or just have a friend come over and braid your hair like once a week(I hear that Mario song in my head) that way you can have hands free to take care of the baby.
@ Jessica – I am at work-from-home/SAHM (between consulting gigs) and I love 2-strand twist outs. To keep them from getting too boring I use a variety of accessories (headbands, brooches, flowers, etc.) and sometimes use a stocking to make an afro puff. I also do flat twists in the front or a couple of small cornrows on each side to change it up a bit.
@ Nikki – I wore my hair in flat twists however I've never seen you in that style so maybe you should just pineapple it like you do when you sleep. Then you can let it down after the delivery. And don't forget your satin pillowcase! I actually brought my own pillow from home. Comfort is key.
Nikki, you will be fine. As sexy is more a state of mind, I know you will be Queen Sexy…I will be having my 3rd son in about 3 weeks and I am 43. I worried about everything the 1st time. Try to take it all in (the birth experience), and try not to worry about the epidural or anything else. You will be beautiful to the ones that love you. That's all that matters…I am gonna do a messy bun. The advice about bringing cash and hair ties is really good. Peace and blessings to you. Pray for me… I will be praying for you…
Am I the only mommy on here that didn't want pictures of her while in labor? I have only 3 pictures of me while pregnant let alone in labor. I kept lip gloss on my lips and socks on my feet (those hospitals tend to be cold). After three deliveries I didn't poop so don't let people frighten you. Every delivery is different trust me. Oh, and tell your husband to carry cash-lots of it. EVERYTHING at the hospital costs: parking, flowers, vending machines, etc.
Hi Nikki,
I am a 1st time mom, I gave birth 4 months ago. I went natural all the way, no epidural, no medicine, no IV. At the end I looked great. I actually wore my hair in a bun with my silk scarf on until I pushed my little angel out. Like someone else said, keep lip gloss you will get dehydrated and dry lips is worse than crazy hair. Lucky for me I pooped at home before I went to the hospital. It's your bodies way of cleaning you out before the baby arrives. By the time my husband and my baby came back from getting cleaned up, I was rested and hair was cute.
Last thing don't worry about being vain, I never leave the house with out earrings so when I went into labor, in between contractions, I put in my diamond studs and my contacts. LOL You will look great.
I would recommend flat twists or cornrows. I wasnt natural at the time but I had my best friend cornrow my hair early before the REAL labor started. It keeps down the tangles and a messy bun may become a hot mess in the long run. LOL
As far as poop, dont worry, Im a nurse and we dont mind and you will not even notice. Apparently I pooped with my baby and im not embarrassed, she came out healthy and happy and thats all that matters.
While I sit here, holding my 6 week old, typing and plotting to twist my hair tonight… I understand Jessica's question totally! For the first 3 weeks I wore twists and tried to bobby pin them into various styles. I also pulled out beanies and scarves whenever wondering out to the doctor's office or to the mailbox. Lately with my daughter sleeping through the night, I've started wearing twist outs and braid outs.
Hey Nik! I'm a youngin' but I've been there done that!
I wasn't natural when I had my son (who will be 2 in October!), but I wore kinky twists during my 3rd trimester, when I had the baby, and thereafter. I actually looked cute after having him, and I'm so happy that I wasn't HIT because I show them to people lol! I'm not sure how you feel about doing that or twists in your own hair. I'm not sure how long they last in your hair either AND keep in mind that I'm TWA length right now!
I'd say you just want something that you know will last, protect your hair, and keep you looking fly (as you always are)!
And as for the pooping, my doctor did an enema on me before I delivered (I was induced as well because of a complication). Some people say that they are running to the bathroom all day when they go into labor, so they really have nothing left to "give".
Good luck on your labor and delivery, I pray that it is smooth and complication-free! Your baby will be beautiful!
I would say for a new mom, you want something that lasts, there's nothing like having to do your hair and nurse or change a diaper too. While braids and twists may be boring, they may save you your sanity. My suggestion is to do them in a way that you can adjust or switch up the style each day. So maybe wear loose one day, add a headband the next, pullback on one side add a flower, pin into an updo or add rollers and curl as they get old. That way you get more options but without the headache of a full re-style.
For Nikki. I suggest asking if you can wear your own top at least and maybe get one of the cute nursing tops that open in the front. Maybe braid or twist and pull up into a high bun. You'll probably be sweating so you don't want it all out and matted to your head. Then demand that you are given a chance to wipe your brow, apply a little gloss or whatever before "official" release pictures are taken. You can save the real deal for your family.
Jessica, How about a bun or something pulled up and out of the way? Your little one is going to start grabbing things soon. Plus, your little one should begin sleeping through the night soon — if she/he hasn't already started — giving you a little more me time.
As for Nikki, you need to write a book about all of these crazy questions you have about having a baby. It is enter-taining! Keep your sexy during labor and delivery? Boy, you tickle me. I think a pedicure will be wonderful and is a good idea. I have the same advice for you as I had for Jessica. Keep that hair up and out of the way.
The baby won't be scared. She can't even see you in color at first, and she won't be able to see you in focus for several weeks. She will know your scent before she knows your face.
One thing you didn't mention was whether you will have an epidural. (I highly recommend.) If you're having an epidural, I think some of what you are talking about will be lessened. If you are doing everything natural, throw those sexy thoughts out with the bath water.
I've been reading your blog for more than a year, and you seem a bit uptight about this labor thing, given you're a therapist and all. Maybe we, your readers, need to give you a Mommy massage! Chill out. Everything will be fine. Relax, relate, release. Seriously.
This is the funniest discussion, ever! I dont have kids, so it never occurred to me to looking so fresh and well…maybe not so clean given the poop and all. I like the idea about a satin pillow.
Hi Nikki – a mother of two writing here (my baby will be 22 in August!). I'm a nursing student and would like to recommend the following
1. Yes, go with the high bun
2. No – forget about the headband, trust me – you will probably use it as a weapon during your "transition stage" of labor!
3. Forget about makeup, go with a clean face and a tube of vaseline for lip moisturization (lots of perspiration and sipping ice chips)
4. Discuss a birth plan with your OB. Do you want natural, epidural, cesarian? Which family members do you want present? Do you want to bring music, aromatherapy, etc? All your birth experience preferences should be discussed and in writing in advance. No drama for the new mama.
5. Not everyone poops during delivery, but when the baby is in descent and you're given the go ahead to begin pushing – to me it felt like I was passing a football sized BM, the largest BM you've ever had in your life!
6. There is a beautiful video from India titled "Breast Crawl". You can watch it at http://breastcrawl.org/video.shtml
Babies can find that breast! Be patient!
7. Baby girl will be active for 30 minutes, looking around at everybody! So get that breastfeeding started! She will then sleep like a log for the next 2-4 hours (so be prepared and don't panic), and then she'll wake and be fitfully alert for the next 4-6 hours! She'll really be eager to breastfeed then.
Be careful with your satin pillowcase and gowns, white linens all look alike and they might pick them up with the hospital laundry. 😛
Trust me – when you're holding that bundle of love, you're gonna look beautiful!
Thanks ladies for all the great tips!
Nikki: I agree with everyone else on how to maintain your sexy (for me, with swollen hands, feet, and face, it was just about looking "presentable") on your delivery day. Just keep it simple!
-Jessica a.k.a Nya's mom
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You guys are the best… absolutely hilarious! I'm glad to hear that I'm not the only one that'll be trying to look good while in labor 🙂
As it stands, I'll probably go for the high bun… with one of those cute Tarjay headbands… unless some new style or accessory comes along before then 😉 Twists and braids aren't really my style, even though they'd probably be the best bet.
thanks ladies!!!! You guys are the best 🙂
My vote is for the high bun and comfortable headband, but I'm guessing when the serious work starts–as in the pushing–you really won't care. (And yes, I pooped during this part. I was mortified because nobody warned me that could happen.) You're one step of ahead of me on that.
Gurrrllll!!! When that first ACTIVE labor pain hits you, the LAST thing you are going to think about is your hair. LOL. I moaned, and groaned, and wallowed so much my so-called hairstyle went out the window! Definitely take your satin-pillow case covered pillow. I've delivered three babies, and while I didn't poop on the table, I got hemrroids from pushing all three times!!! Because it's true, the correct way to push is to use the "bowel movement" muscles! As for the new mom, unfortunately, buns, twists, and braids have been my go to during the early years of motherhood!
SisterBoyd here…our resident nipple nazi. I say go with the bun, but…BUT don't use any product with heavy, strong smells or that will leave a residue on your hands. Why? Since you're planning on breastfeeding you want you hands to be as clean as possible from scent and oils. Also, you want your true scent (yes…YOUR SCENT) to stick around for awhile until you get the baby latched on and nursing. So my advice is the bun and scent-free products.
For the new mom – you've done the easy go to styles of braids. The only other suggestion I have is a bun or ponytail. After I had my son I stayed in ponytails for the first couple of years. When I finally came out I had hair for days.
Oh my goodness these stories were all to funny. I don't have any kids of my own,except for my furbabies. However, I did mention to my mom and sister that at the time for me to have a child and for childbirth. That i will only gain 30 to 35lbs during the 9months, and I will only be in labor for no more than 8 hours tops. I don't plan on kissing or touching the baby after it's immediately born if it has the white film coating and blood all over it.
I've watched the TLC channnel and to much kissing on freshly born babies w/o being cleaned. Yeah i know that is so shallow, but I just dont think that i want to get that up and close with my "MY Stuff" if you know what I mean. But anyway, congrats to Nikki on your impending arrival of your little girl. I would just do some 2 strand twists, and use your headband to keep them out, and right after labor just take them down and only halfway do a twistout.
Wow. You guys are hilarious!
I've got baby #2 due in 69 days (not that I'm counting LOL) and this thread definitely eased some anxiety with laughter.
@Nikki- Yes the pooping is common…I (like lovek) had a don't ask don't tell policy with my hubby and the nurse. Trust me, at that point you will really not care. As for your hair, I'd go with the bun. I've got the Tyra baks five-head going on so I dunno if that will be an option for me LOL.
@Jessica I am stylistically challenged so I say get a friend that can hook up your do in a good protective style that will last a week or so…
Hi Jessica
Please go to the website http://beadsbraidsbeyond.blogspot.com/ its a life saviour for moms in need of some inspiration
peace
two flat french braids. part down the middle or side part, cross and tuck the ends underneath. you can add a flower or any type of headband or pretty scarf. best part is you can wear it for a few days, scarf it at night and not have to fuss with it as you would with a bun. with all the new stuff happening with your body and baby you needs something that is little to no maintenance. but still cute!
When i was in labor i had my hair cornrowed in to a low bun. so that despite all the sweating i did, my hair was still neat after all the labor and pushing and for the next week or 2. That way i could focus on the baby and not my hair and still look cute in a shorter amount of time.
also during labor i didn't poop, but i did vomit all over the place once i dialated to 10 centimeters. and i told the nurse why didn't any one tell me that would happen. she just changed my gown cleaned the floor and said that's normal ….now push!..lol
LOL I love all these stories. I remember the first time a friend's mom told us that you could poop during delivery. We were horrified!
Nikki: Rock that bun and a wrap around, wide headband. Even pin the headband in place if you are worried. You know that will not fail you. Sometimes, after a long day, I am so sure I look like a hot mess, but I look in the mirror and my headband is holding me down!
Jessica: Really, the same advice for you. Except I would change up your buns with pretty scarves as headbands. Buns are great because they are easy to re-do when they start to look too messy.
Just remember back in the day, when women like Audrey Hepburn and Jackie O pretty much had the same look all the time…but it was polished and pretty, and it worked. So, why keep changing it up? Especially, when a little diva is demanding all of your time and energy. Give yourselves a break ladies!
y'all are HILARIOUS!
I had a friend of mine give birth. while she was drugged, she had her sister put on her eye shadown, fix her hair (which was already in a twist out) and put on her lip gloss. According to the nurse, she was the prettiest woman he'd every seen give birth lol
LOL…you will not care what your hair looks like once the pains start kicking in…BELIEVE ME! And once the baby is in your arms for the first time, that's all you'll care about…and you will look beautiful and sweaty, with big ole' hair!
But to be proactive…mini twists…or braid your hair in the same manner as the twist n' curl…worry free, then you can fluff when it is picture time! 🙂
Trust me you won't care. I remember I didn't want a lot of extra people in the delivery room. I didn't want them to see my "stuff" LOL. But trust me you when those pains kick in with the urge to push, you won't care if Jesus was in the room with you. You are going to throw those legs open and let that child out.
When I delivered my daughter 19 months ago I had my hair was pressed, my water broke and I went into labor immediately so, I had my sis quickly do eight to ten cornrows and after 16 hours of labor and a c-section my hair wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I did bring my satin pillowcase and scarf, so maybe that helped a bit. Bring some lip balm and your fav lip gloss, it will definitely refresh your face. As soon as I was cleared to walk I went to the bathroom unraveled my hair and put on some gloss. Some family came early though and caught me looking like I just had a baby :(!
Also dont forget to get a bikini wax or have th hubby take care of that area. Yes before I went to the hosptial I had my hubby shave my bikini area!
I had braids in my hair. I would day go with your mini twists. I would agree not to do the two strand twist while in labor because things can progress really fast. Although I was in labor for 24 hours for the first 12 I thougth they were just the braxton hicks. My one friend did manage a roller set while she was in labor at home. She had a high pony tail while in labor ( I watched the video tape) and all her other pictures she was perfectly coifed(sp).
Nikki,
I would suggest a high bun, mascara, and an epidural. Keep the lip gloss close for when the visitors start piling in. As for the poop, I had a don't ask don't tell rule with my husband. If you decline having a mirror positioned to watch the birth you will never know what actually happened down there.
Jessica,
I again would suggest a bun on most days. And something more stylish when you have help and can take the time to spend on your hair. For me I usually take the time on Sunday and can wear my hair out for two days, then it's back to a boring bun for the rest of the week. It's the price you pay for motherhood. 🙂
I would do two strand twists. However!!! Don't try to do them WHILE YOU ARE IN LABOR. I did this five weeks ago, my baby came on his due date, May 26. What baby really comes on their due date? So I didn't think I was in active labor. I co-washed in the shower then tried to do the twists. My contractions grew progressively worse, and so did my twists! I ended up with about twelve of the worst, stressed out looking twists you've ever seen in your life. I gave birth about 9 hours later wearing a TAM (I think thats what those knit hat thingies are called). HORRIBLE!!!!!!
To Jessica two strand twists are the way to go, after an new baby trying to to take care of yourself and a little one is difficult. I think you should find a cute twisted or braided up hairstyle that is low maintenance.
To Nikki, good luck at looking sexy during delivery, I have two girls and looking cute was the last on my mind when it got down to it. The first child I had micro braids and lost a few during labor. The second child I had a fresh perm with a faux ponytail and no epidural, before that was over with I had snatched the pony out and my hair was all over the place, I have pics to prove it. Trust me labor and cuteness don't go together.
I wore my hair in micros but I pulled it up into a high messy bun. The entire family was there and they were snapping pictures all over the place. Some that should not have been taken, if you know what I mean. Afterwards, I was thanking God that the baby was fine and that my hair was not a mess. I was in labor for 23 hours with my first and was completely exhausted. Lucky me, the epidural worn off before I could give birth. That in itself will make you want to pull your hair out. Definitely choose a style that will hold up well under pressure. Oh, you might want to bring a pair of socks because sometimes the delivery room might be cold, but still get your toes done anyway.
I've had 3 kids the most recent one last Nov. the best thing I've found to do is braids with extensions while in the delivery room. You don't want to just have to worry about the day the baby is there you have to worry about those 3 days your there plus when you get out. The last thing you'll want to have to care about is your hair the first couple weeks and the braids give you that freedom. Especially if your breast feeding.
I would say the same thing for the first question or to do her braids and twists into a style like a mohawk ect.
I have given birth 3 times in my life (2 single births and twins who were delivered by C-section). I can say that under the circumstances I didn't worry about how I looked until it was over. Those were the days of my relaxed hair so I wore my hair in a straw set that was fresh each time. I figured if I had straight hair it would not have looked as attractive afterwards. I made sure to not have anything on my stomach before I went into labor thus each time avoiding the pooping. I did sweat but my hair remained intact with the curls in place. I freshened up my face afterwards with a baby wipe, a squirt of lotion some lip gloss and a piece of gum popped into my dry mouth. You will be fine as long as you are as comfortable as you can be.
For the delivery room
first, bring your own satin pillowcase! keep the frizzies at bay.
I would do two side braids and a headband but trust you will not be thinking about your hair.
I pushed for 2 hours, didn't poop b/c I had nothing to poop but fart I did.
as for Jessica, I think braids and twists out are best b/c they require little time and still can be styled differently. Also acquiring accessories freshens up any style.
You are too much! lol
Well don't worry too much about being sexy.. I am not a mom yet, but I've been around some new moms shortly after giving birth and according to them hair will not be on your mind! But for a low maintenance but nice hair style, why not do french braids into a crown style (where you take the hanging part of the braids and pin them to the top of your head). I think it would look "done" but won't be too much maintenance before, during or after. Along with the gloss and you won't even look like you had a babeh — is that a good thing?!
women….poop on the table while giving birth??!! 0__o oh god, c-section or adoption it is!
as for looking pretty, I'd also suggest a good swipe of gloss to automatically look a little fresher. With a bun, will it be uncomfortable while trying to lean back in the pillow? what about a low side ponytail so that it won't be in the way?
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Im with Anonymous. Keep is simple and go with a bun. Keeps the hair out of your face during the crucial moments and then after you can let your hair out and have those nice 'mommy-glow-hair halo-pictures' with your munchkin. Im in the same boat pedi a must but since Im a 4B with inbetween hair bunning wont work. Two strand twisting and keepin it moving. Ok quick funny story, I met someone recently who told me her water broke while she was under the drying doing a twist and curl and she made her husband take out the rollers and take the chipped polish off her toenails BEFORE heading to the hospital, so dont feel bad about waiting to maintain your delivery sexy…WORK!
I need help with Jessica's question too. My son gives me very little time to experiment so I'm getting bored with the same old styles. What's quick and long lasting??
I had my delivery due all planned out! I was going to messy bun it (as you probably should) and have my satin scarf packed. However, my son canceled all of those plans. He came unexpectedly early, 10 weeks actually. I had nothing! My hair was a mess. I had to walk or roll ALLLL the way over to the NICU to see my son several times a day with my hair looking like something out of a psych ward. And please beware, the gift shop doesn't have so much as a ponytail holder. Pack your goods now! lol..better to be safe!
On a lighter note, my son seems to love my curls. He laughs and coo's at them all the time.
Though I haven't give birth myself, I have attended some and know that if you are comfortable as much as possible the delivery itself can be a lot smoother. And if having a presentable coif gives you comfort-then be it! I would opt for wild hair! It can get sweaty, hot and wet (especially if a birth tub is involved) and perhaps you will move a lot so I' recommend a style that can stand this (just au naturel w/out intervention perhaps) or a style that can be pulled together quickly (within minutes), so the bun is a good idea. Or you leave your hair like it is, slick it back in a pony and bring some adorment, perhaps a nice hair broche as your pre-push gift? Or put one of the flowers you will surely get into your curls…
sidenote 1: your baby cannot see clearly (only shadows) in her first three months. So the baby-scaring -factor is low…she will love you anyways and will be more focused on your -ahem- two girls- than on your 'do. 😉
Hey Nikki,
Well to answer your question about how to look good make sure your lips are glossed, with glossed lips you will look fresh and your hair is in your best TNC it won't sweat out, even if you put it in a bun during active labor and take down when it is over. I have always looked my best on delivery day with a fresh face and hair and feet. Also to keep from pooping when you know you are about to go just don't eat anything if you can. This will prevent the poopy 🙂 I have had 4 kids and I have never pooped and my hair has not sweated out.
LOL@your new found knowledge of pooping. Go with a bun without a doubt. From a mother of two, you'll be H-O-T during active labor. With my first child I like you wanted to be cute and after 12hrs of labor was asking for my scarf to tie that hair BACK lol…gosh at that point I probably would've shaved my head if I would've had clippers I was so hot and sweaty. As for Jessica, for me it's easy because I'm a stay at home mom so I found while my children were very small and slept most of them time, that's when it was easy for me to do my hair, while my daughter slept, I could jump in the shower and wash/cowash and set my hair for a twist out etc. Hope that helps and I can't wait for other ladies to chime in!!