For your chance to win an 8oz bottle of Carols Daughter Khoret Amen Hair Oil, respond to the following in the comments section below:
If time travel was possible, what would you tell your transitioning or newly natural self that would help with overall hair health, length retention, or styling?
On Monday August 9th at 5pm, one curly will be chosen randomly to receive the hair oil. Good luck chicas!
Nik
i would tell myself to stop comparing your hair to other peoples and just learn to appreciate your natural curl pattern! id remind myself that natural hair is fragile and that it needs the utmost care and attention, its not an excuse to be lazy just b/c its not straight so moisturize, protect, and cleanse regularly. be mindful of what you eat. its not about how long it gets but how healthy it is. HEALTHY HAIR IS SEXY HAIR!!!! and above all remember that this is just a piece of the lifestyle.
I would tell my transitioning self to enjoy the journey, don't be in such a rush to reach your destination. Your journey won't be the same as anyone else's journey, but that doesn't make it any less special.
Sulfates are evil things and so are brushes…I suffered so much breakage and so much dryness from overdoing it with my shampoo usuage, and using brushes. I combed way too much and had more shedding than was necessary. I'd also tell myself to stop fighting with your hair and let it be. That would make my hair smile and lead to a healthier head of hair in the future!
OMG! I had one of those moments this morning while washing my hair. I've dedicated myself to clearing out all the old products I purchased during my PJ days. I've thrown out the stuff I just hated or gave them away but there's a ton of things that I stopped using because I thought I found something "better." So this morning I tried an old bottle of Pantene Beautiful Lengths Conditioner on my currently transitioning hair (10 months in whoop whoop!) and I was amazed at the slip! I didn't like this when I first started transitioning. I had so much trouble detangling with it at 3-4 months post. I couldn't believe how well my natural hair responded to it!
So I would tell my newly transitioning self not to give up on the products I'm trying at that stage. To tuck them away and give them another shot later on. The way that new, stubborn, virgin hair responds to product is not the same way my hair will respond to product further down the line. Also I would tell my newly transitioning self to make sure I snip along the way. My hair has been feeling much better since I started to cut away the relaxed ends and keep all my hair at one even length.
I would say moisturize, moisturize, moisturize!! Wish I knew the importance then to what it could have done in those early stages. *kanye shrug* You live and you learn!
Peace&Love!
i would say stick to works best for you and dont follow every trend that you hear or read about, and to always wear an head scarf at night, might
I would tell my transitioning seld to STOP with the weaves- they are going to stunt my growth!! I would also encourage transitioning me to listen to my hair more :/ something I'm still trying to do.
Stop! Put down that tub of Cantu Shea and back away slowly, slowly…
Hey Liz,
Your hair is so beautiful and now you can see the real you inside and out. When you do a length check and get excited and want to keep your hair blown out; remember what you did you get your TWA to shoulders. Keep it curly, healthy and always be your beautiful self.
This is my second time transitioning, so in away everything that I am doing "now", I did not do "then", is my way of advising myself. Nonetheless, I remind myself everyday that this is my "natural" journey. I need to be patient, caring, and understanble about my hair. If I want "it" (my hair) to be all that "it" can be, I need to invest time, gain the knowledge, and just take it one day at a time. Most importantly, not to give up and don't let me catch you contemplating on "Relaxing"…
If there was a slight possiblity to travel in time, I would say Jasmine understand that the transition is not all about your hair, but the inside to outward positive growth in self esteem. I would say evaluate from day one how this process changes your prospective on yourself as in individual as well as how people see you. I would say "way to go" each day I look at myself and learn to love me more and more, not worrying about the spouses thoughts, the co-workers, friends, and relative. Only my acceptance is important…and smile!
To embrace my beautiful hair and moisturize, moisturize and moisturize again. And never get hook on the creamy crack again.
If time travel were possible I would tell my transitioning self to keep my hair/scalp moisturized at all times with a good oil, do not comb/brush often, don’t keep hair slicked back too often, wear protective styles such as Rod sets and Bantu knots, co-wash, use a wide-tooth comb, trim ends, don’t use heat to straighten new growth, continue eating my veggies (I’m a vegetarian), drink lots of water to stay hydrated, wear a silk scarf at night, and NEVER put relaxer/texturizer on the hair again.
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I would tell my newly natural self that protective styling is important to retaining hair length, start a hair journal, and to be more patient. It sounds cliche but all good things come to those who wait. I didn't realize how fast my hair was growing until I looked back at pictures in my Fotki and Hair blog. Those really helped to notice the difference…good or bad with my hair.
If I could go back in time, I would go back to my elementary school days when I was natural and teased for not having perm. I would tell myself that your hair will break off and not be as beautiful as it is now. I would tell them that natural hair is beautiful and people only tease you because they cannot comprehend what is different.
I would tell myself to moisturize, moisturize, moisturize. Moisture is my best friend, heat is my worst enemy. Also, to love my natural beauty because it's the way God intended for me to be.
I would definitely tell myself to 1) Steer clear of direct heat. 2)Professionalism does not equate to straightened hair 3)Treat the ends of your hair like old lace. 4)Your hair always does what it wants anyway, just roll with it.
I would tell myself to detangle in the shower only, trim every few months and for heavens sake, DEEP CONDITION woman!! LOL
To trim and deep condition religiously! And also to not try to make my hair fit the styles of others- just to listen to it and let it do it's own thing.
If time travel was possible I would tell myself:
1. Research, research, research! YouTube, hair forums and hair blogs are your friends.
4. Buy a good sulfate-free shampoo and a moisturizing conditioner. The rest of your products can made from natural/food-grade ingredients: shea butter, aloe vera gel, honey, avocados, oils, etc.
3. Shampoo, condition, detangle and DC once a week!
4. Protective styles are more than braids or two strand twists–Research creative updos(think Janelle Monae or Shingai Shoniwa).
5. Mind your own follicles. Do not tell people about going natural or how awesome it is and expect them to convert instantaneously. Do offer advice/tips when they are solicited.
I would say…..
A. Stop spending money on all these damn expensive products. All you need is a good conditoner, shea butter and aloe vera gel.
B. Stop watching other people's curls…. Pay attention to your own.
C. there is no miracle growing technique. Eat good, take care of your hair, take your vitamins. Be happy!
D. Despite what your mother or men think, You are beautiful.
I would tell myself to not become a product junkie! Every (natural) product that I will try will produce the same or similar results. It just the texture of my hair. No product will change that. I WILL learn to love it. And my pocketbook will thank me for it.—-Tawanna D
RELAXERS are evil….LOL
Be patient; handle with care; moisture, moisture, moisture and then moisture some more, stay away from heat; find the products that work and then stick with them until they don't.
After I big chopped 5 years ago, I would tell myself to:
– moisturize more often with deep conditioners and oils
– use henna to color and strengthen hair
– style hair with funky accessories
– and protect my hair better from breakage.
Enjoy your hair at each stage and try a variety of styles. There's so many options that you should not get bored.
I would tell myself to make sure my hair stays moisturized.
figure out what protective styles are you most comfortable wearing and start wearing them.
Avoid product build up and don't wash too often because you can lose moisture doing so.
If I could venture back and tell my transitioning self a thing or two, here is what I would say:
~DO NOT LISTEN TO ANYONE BUT YOU! Everyone has something to say to help, but in the end it is your hair so do what you think is right.
~Enjoy your hair no matter what length it will become.
~ Shea butter is your hair's friend, not your scalp's friend.
~Be braver! I cut my hair off completely on a dare (I am competitive that way) and I just remember thinking why didn't I do this sooner?
~Deep conditioning is a must. Just because your hair is now natural doesn't mean it won't need your help to be stronger.
~BACK AWAY FROM THE GEL! Hair will curl into its own texture. I do not need styling gel or grease.
~DO NOT BE ALARMED BY THE "SHRINKAGE FAIRY". Everyone gets a visit from the shrinkage fairy and it is a part of being natural.
I would leave behind a bottle of shea butter, a poo bar, and the address to this website (something to look forward to) since it has made a world of difference to me!
I would tell myself great job on taking the leap and continue to encourage myself since this is what I needed the most.
We all make mistakes such as using products that do not promote healthy hair and or over use heat because we are transitioning and that takes time mentally.
However we all took the biggest step and that was to make the decision to make a change and I would tell myself, good job and don't stop "growing"!
i would have tell myself that love your hair no matter what, and dont try to make your hair what its not.because i realized that since been natural i have envy other natural hair like curlynikki's hair but i learned that it take patience, faith and time to get there.
2. i would tell myself to not waste money on product that people claim to be the best, because what works for me might not work for other, in other words not to be a product junkie. stick to what works for me and stop deviating
I would tell myself to forget what other people said and keep going (I was nearly natural once before this journey). Practice braiding and get a good spray bottle (I now have 3, but it took awhile to get a decent one.
I would tell myself:
deep condition, deep condition, deep condition
moisturize, moisturize, moisturize
patience, patience, patience!!!
I would tell myself to be patient with my hair and understand that not everyday will be a GREAT hair day!! MY Black Naturally Kinky Hair Is Beautiful!!!
I would tell myself…
1. not to by that wet/dry flat iron during transition
2. Not to go to super cuts to get a trim
3. Stop do not buy that hair color it will damage what you've worked so hard to accomplish!
4. moisturize like crazy
5. be confident even when you feel less than
CurlyNat
stick with the products that work. dont buy anything that others are using because your taking a risk with it possibly not working on your hair
Don't compare your hair to anyone elses
1. Be patient during your transiton, do not BC until you are ready to.
2. Learn what your hair needs and study blogs.
3. Do not be tempted to doubt your decision based on the comments of others.
4. Accept your hair type and ROCK IT!
I would tell myself to always comb my hair with conditioner and water.
Its not that complicated, but I didn't know ANYTHING about natural hair care, even though I have been natural for 7 years.
find curly nikki. seriously. i was natural for 5 years before i found this blog. my hair was a mess for 5 years. from this blog i learned that my hair is protein sensitive and it has changed my hair forever. 5 years of frustration would have been saved.
Stop pressing your hair – heat damage is just as bad a perm! You will have to cut the pressed sections off too silly!
I would tell my newly natural self to only try one type of product at a time; no need to buy 3 different types of conditioner @ once! 🙂
If I could go back I'd tell myself to NEVER use a relaxer or hair dye!! I ruined my hair all too much with that stuff and I'm so happy to be without it now 🙂
I would tell myself that not only will it take time and patience to transition, but it will also take time and patience to love what God has given me, from head to toe!
Ten years ago I would have told myself 'stay away from the relaxer- 3 inces of new growth doesn't mean your hair is flowing!" (I would have stuck with my transitioning and not given up at the fro.)
I would tell myself to be PATIENT, and to listen to what my hair is telling me. Which was mainly, "FEED ME!!!" Moisturize, moisturize, moisturize. I'd also tell myself about the glorious wonder of Co-Washing.
And to check out this great site called curlynikki.com!!
Cris
I would tell my newly natural self to check out CurlyNikki.com and NaturallyCurly.com. I didn't find out about these sites until I was at least 6 months into my 'completely natural' hair journey. These sites have truly been invaluable. There's such a wealth of knowledge out there, and all of my fellow curly ladies have helped me retain length and keep my curls popping on a regular!
Thanks,
Hurjurnee
That no matter how much I like a product, I cannot make my hair like it monikamac95
I would have told myself ten years ago that true beauty comes in all forms so it is a good, NO-Great thing for me to wear my hair natural. So, stand proud with my braids, walk erect with my twists and add a huge "SMILE" when I wear my Afro.
Allnatural1 (Michelle in Grapevine TX)
I would tell my newly natural & 6 weeks post BC self to take a deep breath and really get to know my beautiful hair through measured trail and error attempts to find the right products for me!
Stay away from the creamy crack (hair relaxer). Chemical free is the way to be 🙂
I would tell myself to avoid heat at all cost and embrace my afro! Also that while variety is the spice of life it shouldn't be at the expense of me hair.
if i could go back in my transition i would tell myself to stop straightening and combing my hair every 5 minutes and just let it be.
I would have been a long-term transitioner and would have done more research. I would have big chopped only when I felt comfortable with the length of my hair. I would have like to have learned more natural styles. I would have prepared myself mentally for the change to come. Going natural isn't just about hair. It's about a mindset. Knowing what I know now would have saved me plenty nights of crying because I didn't like my hair. People having negative comments to say about your hair is not going to kill you. People will always hate. It is up to you to not entertain them but to educate them. It would have made a lot of decisions more wisely.
I would tell my self to do more research and have more patience. Before when I first did the big chopped. I basically decided one night to shave my head and the next few weeks had no idea how to maintain or even style my twa, so I went back to using relaxers and braiding my hair, until the last time ( I shaved it all off again and started from again). This time, with more knowledge, patience and mos def more research.
I'd tell my self to be patient, find a regimen, moisturize, and do research. Of all the things, being patient is first and key. Also, put time and love into taking care of your (my) hair.
I would tell myself that our hair prefers streched styles and moisture, moisture, moisture is key. I would also give myself a heads up on the kimmytube leave in conditioner. This info would have prevented numerous BC over the years.
I'd love to be able to go back in time. I'd tell myself to stop trying to find PRODUCTS to make my hair healthy, and start from the INSIDE. I spent way too much money on products that didn't "work." I should have been trying to make my whole body healthy by drinking plenty of water, eating well, and exercising.
If I could go back in time I would tell myself to look at youtube videos, blogs, and forums for information and inspiration because I had no idea what to do with my hair when i first did my bc. I would also tell myself to do more protective styles instead of wash and go's everyday.
I would tell myself , to follow my intuition and do not worry about other peoples comments. When I first went natural I received so many nappy comments and jokes from my family so I kept my hair covered in braids and sew-in's for the first few months and then I got tired and decided to just wear my hair for what it was …but once again the family and friends were not very opened so I TEXTURIZED MY HAIR …. that is what it took for me to finally realize that what I do with my body and my hair should be based on only what I wanted and not anyone else because they are not the one's wearing it …I AM !!! So i will be doing another big chop from the texturizer in a few months .
I would tell myself to step away from all of the dozens of kinds of hair "grease", say "there is nothing in those jars that will give you the hair of your dreams or even clear up your dandruf" and maybe even leave behind a jar of shea butter for my younger self
I'd tell myself to use less heat and deep condition more while I was transitioning! And also to try out more styles, instead of just putting my hair back in a bun all the time lol.
I'd tell myself to BACK AWAY FROM THE COMPUTER!! Too much information can be just as bad as too little! Research, dont worry about the expensive products you can't afford. Get a stable routine, stick to it and get your hand out of your head! It'll save you from those two extra bc's lol
See as how im currently transitioning for the 4th time (i had a few relapses lol)i would travel back in time to tell my grandma not to put a perm in my hair. When my mother was out of town, she put a relaxer in my hair when i was only 3!!!
Back away from the hard bristle brush!
I'd tell myself not to fight the new texture growing in by trying to straighten it to blend in with the relaxed hair. I'd let myself know that there are many transitional styles like twist-outs, braid-outs, and updo's that will look great during the transition. And to be patient!
If I could go back in time, I would have told myself NOT to do that trim at 12am when I was so sleepy. I lost so much unnecessary hair! =(
I would also tell myself to keep it simple, being a PJ only lead me to being broke! lol
I would tell myself:
It may be a little shocking, having short natural hair, once you do the BC but it's worth it!
You can have long healthy beautiful hair and relaxers will not get you there.
Once you learn how to moisturize and take care of your natural hair it really does not feel much different from when you did have relaxers. It's just as soft and manageable and you can create the exact same styles only now your hair will be healthy. This is coming from 4Z (lol) hair type!
Learn from youtube videos and natural hair sites.
Theres a lot to learn.
Enjoy every length and style because your hair is gonna grow SO FAST!
I would tell myself to stop with all the obession over the perfect wash and go. Wash and go styles are not for everyone. Pay more attention to the health and less attention to curl definition!
if time travel was possible, what would you tell your transitioning or newly natural self that would help with overall hair health, length retention, or styling?
I would tell myself to learn to love myself for who I am and stop trying to please other people. people don't like natural hair? it's ok because I do, people tell you it's ok to relax ALL the hair and not the new growth in college? stop being so gullible. I would tell myself to put the flat iron away and accept myself for who God made me to be, a strong, black NATURAL woman…
(now if only he could help me to not be a product junkie ;-))
I would tell myself not to covet the curls of others and save myself countless hours of disappointment because my twist didn't look like hers! LOL!!
I would tell my shelf that shampooing everyday is not necessary.
I would tell myself not to buy that relaxer because it's not my brand and my edges will suffer dearly. Also that I am doing a good job transitioning and even though a relaxer sounds like a easier plan having just had a baby, I will have greater rewards down the road if I just keep transitioning and checkout curlynikki.com for hair styles and tips.
I WOULD TELL MYSELF THE BEAUTY STARTS WITHIN AND THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS GOOD HAIR GOOD HAIR IS HEALTH HAIR.
Water is your best friend.
If time travel was possible I would tell myself:
1. Don't be a product junkie
2. Accept your curls the way they are everybody doesn't have teh same curl pattern.
3. Stay away from the flat iron!!
4. Everybody doesn't have to like your hair
as long as you do
5. Oils and deep conditioning your hair is a must… stay dedicated and focused to your hair journey!!!
If time travel were possible, I would tell myself:
1. Rome wasn't built in a day…be patient and calm
2. Don't do your own big chop!
3. Stop buying every darn product you see or hear about
4. Look at girls with length as motivation, not to be jealous of their hair
5. Stop skipping your vitamins
6. Love yourself even when your hair looks crazy!
Self, length does not equal beauty. Stop holding on to those permed ends! Castor oil added to any conditioner will rock your world one day. Stop trying to do style that require you too brush the roots straight on the sides. Self that's making the sides thinner. Your hair is beautiful and curly. Believe me self I know what Im talking about.
Do EVERYTHING IN SECTIONS!!!!
let your hair dry in braids.
love your hair because its part of who you are.
Dont compare yourself to anybody else because you are different. And God lives evry part of who you are!!:)
I would tell myself that healthy hair starts from within and that I should start to make more natural and healthier choices in food. I would aslo say to my newly natural self to be patient and have during this TWA stage in determining what products my hair likes!
I would tell myself to be patient and allow my twists, braids or whatever else to dry before I taken them out.
To pay attention to my edges earlier even though my hair was in a sew in/ protective style. Also, to educate myself about becoming natural because I went natural kind of by accident and without any implications about what being natural meant. (I just stopped getting relaxers because I wore a full sew-in back to back for 2.5years so there was no need for one. And it allowed my hair to RETAIN LENGTH from low manipulation and moisture retention from the braids underneath it, which was my goal, but it happened at the expense of a weakened hairline.)
I would shake myself "Girl don't u get no damn curl and be heavy handed on the moisture,your hair will be down yo back!"
Short journey so far (1 year of transitioning)….but I would tell myself to take moisturizing more seriously, ESPECIALLY in the winter (no wash and go! just no!)
I would tell myself that any time I felt "bored" with my hair, attempting to loc and or add dye is not the best answer. Instead, I would encourage myself to try new styles. I had the same styles for 6 years!!
First I would tell myself to do the big chop instead of transitioning. Second I would let myself know that not all products work the same on everybody.
WHEN IA MADE THE DECISION TO GO NATURAL I WOULD HAVE VUT MY HAIR IMMEDIATELY INSTEAD OF LOOKING FOR ACCEPTANCE FROM OTHERS AND HAVE HAD A MORE PERSONAL JOURNEY BY MYSELF AND THE CONFIDENCE FROM WITHIN INSTEAD FROM INSULTS THER IS NOTHING LIKE SELF DISCOVERY I KNOW A LOT PEOPLE LIVE BY SOMEONE ELSES WORDS BUT WHENS THEY ARE YOU OWN IT MEANS MORE SO I HAVE MY OWN QUOTES FOE MY SELF " I AM LIVING THIS NEW LIFE FOR THROUGH ME AND FOR ME"
I would say "Self"… and Self would say back "yes" and I would continue " stop trying to conform to everyone elses view of beautiful hair… PUT DOWN THAT FLAT IRON!
I am a 2mth transitioner and I have many times before tried to transition into being natural but never went through with it fully and I wish I could go back.
1) I would have told myself to be proud of the hair that is on your head. People will love your natural curl if you learn to love it. Don't worry about what the girl next to you is doing to her hair because she might be looking at you with envy.
2) Life is not an Herbal Essence commercial so stop trying to look like the women on TV. Stop with the super hot flat ironing with tons and tons of hair grease only making my hair slightly manageable. I'm only doing more damage than good.
3) Last but not least, I would tell myself…moisturize, moisturize, moisturize!!! Life became so much easier when I realized that all I had to do was find a good deep conditioner and hair moisturizer and my hair would actually behave the way I want instead of using heave hair grease that would not only do nothing for hair but breakout my face in the worse way. Oh Lord it was like my prayers were answered!!
If I could go back in time and talk to my newly natural self, I would tell myself that my hair is fine, not coarse, and that it was counter-productive to give my hair the copious amounts of moisture I was giving it, and to start incorporating some more proteins into my routine.
I would also tell myself that daily wash-&-goes on hair that was more than 3 inches long (at most) would lead to lots of knots and breakage, and that protective styling would be extremely beneficial to my hair.
I would tell myself to listen to what my hair was telling me. I remember every time I had new growth I would just get my hair straightener out. I wouldn't consider what the new growth meant…those nice little curls that I'm much more familiar with now…so I would tell myself, let your hair grow out and let it be curly. I remember when I had my big chop I felt my hair and thought…this feels familiar and it feels nice.
If i could go back in time I would definitely tell myself that while I am transitioning, there are Protective styles that can be used other than weaves!
Oh an Knock knock… PUT THE FLAT IRON DOWN! lol
I would tell myself not to get my hair cut into a short bob with short layers in the back, because in the very near future you are going to meet some special ladies and they are going to teach you how to take care of your curly hair.It took FOREVER! to grow out those short layers in the back of my head!Its been 3 yrs and its blending in so much better now!I had never planned to wear it curly it was cute straight but then I started following curly Nikki on nc.com and the rest is history!(Raina)
I would tell myself, "My curly hair is a reflection of myself: wild, not easily tamed,beautiful and natural. Why ruin that with a flat iron?"
I would say check out youtube, add moisture, stop the hair manipulation and use aussie moist.
I would tell my newly natural self: "Stop using heat, it causes split ends. Resist the urge to straighten your hair because that's what other people expect from you. Be patient, the products that used to work on your relaxed hair will not work now. Pay attention to the pH of your hair products. Use protective styles often and only wear your hair out on special occasions to prevent breakage. DO NOT buy new products until you finish what you have!!! Take other people's advice with a grain of salt because what works for them may not work for you. And most of all enjoy the journey of getting to know your hair all over again."
If I could go back I would tell myself to Wash and condition weekly, moisturize and long term styles. I would also tell myself to note that your hair is not going to be like it is at the roots because of the transitioning har. Love it and embrace it.
Well, by Gods grace I found YA BLOG when I started transitioning so mine was great! LOL!! I would NOW, moisturized more (I was a lil lazy) taken my vitamins and watched what I ate. I Really belive my diet changed now has helped the overall health of my hair! Lastly, drink plenty of WATER!!!!
Thanks Nikki!
mrsnicolek@yahoo.com
I would go back to when I was 13 years old when I was getting my first perm. I would tell myself to STOP AND STEP AWAY FROM THE CHAIR!!! I would say to myself to stop being lazy and spoiled and take the initiative to learn how to do my own hair. Don't get frustrated or angry when things aren't going my way when taking care of it seems to hard. I'm a new learner and these things take time and lots and lots and LOTS of patience. I would then convince myself to do a mini chop if the length is too much. Afros are awesome and no, I won't look like a boy because I have boobs and hips, hips, hips (lol). Lastly I would tell myself that my hair is NOT all I am. Just because people always complimented me on my hair more then anything else about me DOES NOT mean that it's the only thing I have to be proud of. It does not mean that if I cut my hair short that I will lose some hair and any self-esteem I have too. I would tell myself that I am intelligent, that I am capable of doing my hair and being self sufficient, and that there is and will always be in the future much more to me than my hair.
I would tell myself "self, your hair is so dry– it is NOT supposed to feel this way! Deep condition more frequently and soon your life will get a lot easier. Oh and P.S. ditch the silicones, they are not doing you any favors."
I would tell myself to properly take care of my hair and be more attentive to the products i put in my hair as well as the food I eat.
i would say that it is importaunt to trim, in the beginning i was so caught up with lenght, but my ends were so ragged that one day i trimmed. 5 months later my hair is still fabulous because i took care of the overall health instead of the appearence.
If I could go back in time, I would tell my newly natural self not to go out and purchase every new product I hear about. Try a product at least 3 times before I decide if I like it or not. Moisturizing and sealing is so important. Listen to the veterans….natural/organic products work better on your hair.
I would tell myself to moisturize,moisturize,moisturize and to really protect those ends!!!
Enjoy the short hair…once it grows longer, detangling and styles like twisting etc are going to take much longer to do! lol ~KF519
Do some research!! When I went natural i kept doing everything the same, except getting perms of course. I would tell me to find other options besides flat ironing for transitioning, because now my curls are all but straight on one side. I would also tell me to be brave and do at least a mini-chop. I missed out on the fun of seeing myself with different lengths and styles because my hair stayed the same. I would also tell me to find a leave in conditioner and deep conditioner. It feels so nice to have moisturized hair that it almost shocked me. Then I'd tell me to study harder so I could get a better job. (Just a side note since I'm going back in time and all. LOL! :-))
If I could go back in time 40 plus years ago, I would have told myself not to feed into the myth that your hair has to be straight to be beautiful or for you to be happy with yourself. Happiness does not depend on looking like everyone else. I also would have learned to do twists to protect and retain length and have a style that lasts several days. beachgirl56
I would grab the nearest "flux capaciter" and hop into the Delorian, "Back to the Future" (LOL!) I would tell myself the following:
1) Buy African Shea Butterand JBCO, as it will help you to seal your ends
2) You will be tempted to go out and buy every product that you hear about on youtube.
3) I will tell myself about Youtube and rate, comment and subcribe:)
4) Your hair will shrink like crazy but that is ok!
5) Buy a Denman brush to aid in detanlging.
6) Moisturize, seal, detangle and trim!
If time travel was possible I would tell myself transitioning or newly natural self don't get frustrated, I am still beautiful, don't put a weave in you're gonna feel even more self conscious when its out, don't flat iron or blowdry your hair its going to break your hair, the same pride you had when you became comfortable with putting your hair in natural hairstyles keep it even when you wake up looking like who done it and you think no matter what you do your hair is not going to look as good as a relaxed style, your hair is going to need time and effort but if you treat it right wear protective styling and don't listen to those who tell you to "straighten your hair it probably is long now" it will be worth the struggle and frustration once you learn how to manage your BEAUTIFUL hair
I would tell myself to not get caught up in trying different products and not color your hair.
First of all I would like to say I think you are the cutest thing and more so preggy..congrats…I been a lurker for months now. Now to get to the question.
Let's see I will travel back to my afro puffs around the early 8o's, I was about 5 (telling my age, but it's ok…lol)and I would show my mom that I love the beautiful fluffy puffs she put in my hair by admiring it with a smile so big not even santa could take that away, in hopes that she would understand that I am beautiful with the way god made my hair grow out of my head and at 5 I have self worth.
Thanks for your cute styles and great articles Curly Nikki…check out my blog if you get a chance alwaysfirstathletics.wordpress.com .once again thanks for your great info. and articles…
A few things I would tell myself is first to learn what your hair likes, which requires tons of patience. Do take in other people's suggestions, but you really have to find out what works best for you because not everyone's hair responds positively to certain products. Secondly, moisturize the correct way (which I believe is a water based product, butter, than oil…I always have to reference my notes if it's butter than oil or vice versa). And finally, take care of your ends. Trim as necessary, search & destroy, and limit heat; if you do use heat, protect your hair properly and don't over do it. Still learning…but I'm getting there 🙂
I would definitely tell myself to leave the heating tools alone; we don't need them to achieve acceptable, beautiful styles. Also, I would bypass the transitioning and just BC right away. Finally, I would tell myself the value of a moisturizing/sealing routine.
I would say to myself, I am a woman after God's own heart! Any and everything I set my mind to I can accomplish! The bible says that God covers us day and night from the top of our heads to the soles of our feet and I believe that! I am transitioning not into a different me but a better me…shedding a few layers is all that this process entails and will allow my hair to be cleansed of unnecessary impurities and will allow my mind to begin and with much prayer complete its wonderful transition into a new mindset of CONFIDENCE,DILIGENCE,AND SOPHISTICATION!!!
If I was to go back 10 years ago, qhen I got my first relaxer, I would say PUT THE RELAXER KIT DOWN MOM!!!!!! I would remind myself that I am and always will be differnt because of these beautiful, thick, coily, and versatile, curls. My hair always set my apart from little girls my age, but I was always teased because it was soooo big!!!! I would have told myself to always remember that I am special and God doesn't make mistakes!!!! He put me on this earth the for a purpose and I shouldn't changes for anyone but myself. I would also say that I should love my innner and outer beauty because that what makes a person not their clothes, shoes, makeup, or even HAIR!!!!
after my BC, i would scream at my college self "hey genius, texturizers are just as bad as relaxers. and then the dye on top of it, what are you thinking?!?"
No relaxer…no relaxer…no relaxer…I would tell myself to stick to it and see the transition through.
I would tell myself to put down the flat iron and find yourself a good braider that knows how to work with natural hair so your hair will be in a protective style and you won't have "hand in hair" syndrome!!!
I would tell my transitioning self to focus on moisturizing the hair more.
I would tell myself to embrace my hair! I wore braids for a long time after my BC and the last set really caused me to sacrifice a lot of length. Now that I gently style on a regular basis, my hair has become very manageable and grown so fast.
everything in moderation…including buns.
Dear Self,
I know you think that brushing your hair from to tip is a good way to ensure that "only the strong hairs survive" but please PLEASE for the love of god stop. Tip to root, tip to root, and only with a seamless comb. And PLEASE don't even think about doing this unless you are in the shower with the use of copious amounts conditioner. What? Don't give me that look COPIOUS. Whats more important? Some cheap 6 dollar bottle of conditioner or maintaining hair length? Trust me. I know what I'm talking about.
Sincerely,
You
I would tell myself not to BC. I transitioned for 17 months and I had fairly long hair so when when I did the actual BC I was shocked at how short my hair actually was. I chopped because I was so consumed with the destination rather than the journey…if I had to do it all over again I would just tell myself to let it grow & let it flow!
I would say keep at look at what you have accomplished? aren't you glad you stuck it out? those blogs and reserach really helped you. Don't forgt to keep tying your hair up and moisturize, moisturize
Dear self,
This is the begining of a long love hate relationship! But no matter what love your self and take confidence in your decision to transistion. (1)Heat is no longer your friend!!, (2)learn to perform the techniques on your transistion hair that many use on there natural hair. this will prepare you and elimate heat use all together. this also means learn the importantance of moisturizing! (3) Big Chop when YOU are ready! Dont feel pressured to do so because you see others doing so or out of pure impatience. Be happy with your decision as you are doing it. (4) Embrace the natural journies, advice and tutorials from others. They can offer much to you now and later. Most of all Love yourself and make sure you know this is a personal decision that YOU have CHOOSEN to make, so DON'T PUNK OUT!!!
Love
You
I would recite to myself Marianne Williamson's famous quote:
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
Although Ms. Williamson was not talking specifically about hair, hair is so entangled with self-love in the various black communities throughout the world that I really believe the quote is applicable. I can be me, and what I am is enough. By being me in all my natural glory, I can instill confidence in others to be themselves. My hair is good because it is mine, it is unique, and it will never be exactly the same as anyone else's hair. I'm grateful for good hair.
I would say: 1. braid outs make the growing out worth it. 2. ponytails and buns are FAB. 3. co-wash & henna are your new besties. 4. Aloe, shea butter, coconut oil, olive oil, and water…THAT'S ALL YOUR HAIR NEEDS!!! Save our $$$.
I would tell myself to cut my relaxed ends off earlier, and to do more protective styling. Oh, and I'd wait at least a year before using heat on my hair.
If I could go back to the year 2000, I would've stayed natural, and not have to do it again in 2007.
If I were to go back and talk to my younger self about hair, I would tell myself to treat my hair like a baby- lots of love and gentle care. I would also tell myself that my short hair is just as pretty as another natural's long hair. It's all beautiful!!
I would tell myself (after I BC):
1. avoid heat like fried foods, only a few times but know it will affect you.
2. moisturize, moisturize, and moisturize.
3. you are beautiful
I would tell myself to…
(1) …not transition using flat irons in attempts to "camouflage" my natural hair with my relaxed hair. Huge mistake!
(2) …transition for a short period of time in order to learn how to care for and embrace my natural hair earlier in the process.
(3) …realize my hair is just as beautiful as other naturals; even if my hair has 500 battling patterns and textures emerging from the same scalp. 🙂 Stop wishing for someone else's hair texture or length.
(4) …enjoy the entire process and embrace each day (and my hair) as it comes.
I would tell myself to relax and stop obsessing and stop flat ironing! I flat ironed my hair and refused to give the curly styles a chance until I cut it. I think if I would have practiced more with transitioning styles, I would have loved my hair more when I cut it and the shock would have been less.
I would say slow down with the products! I became such a PJ in the beginning.
i would tell my transitioning self to do research earlier. i waited until after i BCed to do research on products, styles, and overall natural hair. if i would have armed myself properly throughout my transition, i would not have jumped the gun on doing the BC and being lost for two months thereafter.
i would tell me to PLEASE PLEASE moisturize and don't get a perm that time before LA! could have been 2 or 3 years into my journey now instead of just 1.5
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I would tell myself that there is more work to do be done AFTER the big chop than before. Short hair, by no means, equals easy hair. The struggle is worth it, however. Treat your curls with as much love and care as you would any other aspect of your being. Listen to it and respect what it has to say.
If I could go back in time I would tell my "transitioning self" to STOP with the flat iron already!!! sheesh! Since I stopped using it, my hair has changed so much (for the better) And I know now that keeping away from heat will help a lot with length.
Oh, and I would also tell myself (something I am still working on) to stop looking at other naturals and expecting/wanting my hair to be just like theirs. I would tell myself that my hair is BEAUTIFUL too.
I would tell myself to love my hair for what it is and stop trying to change it into what it is not. Beauty is deep within so I would say to love myself and I would love my hair.
If i could go back in time i would tell myself to maintain the hair that i have instead of wanting a looser texture because in the end my hair texture will never change, and i would have spent less time eye balling those " new and improved" relaxers. I would also tell myself to take the time to learn my hair so once i finally went natural I would know which products were truely working and which were doing more harm than good.
1. I would tell myself to pay more attention to the transitioning process! I just stopped getting perms because I didnt like them anymore and never thought twice about it.
2. BACK AWAY FROM THE FLAT IRON!
3. People are not lying to you when they say they like your hair curly && everyone that laughs is not laughing at you. [[I was paranoid the first times I wore my hair out curly lol]]
4. One day you will LOVE your hair so much more than you every thought you could love hair!
That you WILL have bad hair days as a natural. Don't sweat it. 🙂
I would tell myself to be patient and remember that it will definitely get longer with time! I would also stress the importance of regular professional maintenance.
I would tell myself to not get the second haircut! The second haircut ended up with the barber making a mistake in which cutting off extra INCHES was the only solution.
Also, I would say "throw away the pantene" and "don't even think about the expensive brands- go straight to herbal essence".
Well I'm currently transitioning, but I would tell myself 10 years ago -when I first tried to transition– that my hair is NOT too thick/kinky to wear natural.
If I could go back in time, I would tell my myself to stop using heat on my hair! I've been able to retain so much length by staying away from heat and keeping my hair moisturized.