The Mirror

by Leisa Monique of Eat My Dessert First

Have you ever seen a woman that you were in awe of from just looking at her? Physically beautiful, educated, working a great job, driving a nice car and/or possessing some other attribute that you admire. Perhaps it’s the way she carries herself or the fact that she seems to be so powerful that has earned your admiration.

So many times we look at others and begin to feel intimidated and think “If only I…”. Sometimes it seems that these people posses something that we do not, or are in a place in life that we would like to be.

A few months back I was telling my friend Sandra how intimidated I felt because I was meeting lots of powerful women. Some had their Ph D’s and were heads of corporations, some were Vice Presidents of companies, others were Executive Directors of Non-Profits and successful business owners. These women own their own homes, drive nice cars and are very well put together. And here I am working as a field director in politics. I have yet to finish my degree and despite having the desire to do so, I do not own my home. Can you see the pity party I was beginning to have?

When you select your friends, you should choose people that are going to hold you accountable, and lovingly tell you when you are being ridiculous! When I expressed my insecurities to Sandra, she immediately snapped at me and asked what was I talking about! She pretty much chewed me out! She reminded me of the journey that I’m on and the things that I have accomplished in recent years. She reminded me of the successful businesses that I created, the records that I had set or broken in careers, the divorce that I had gracefully gone through, and how I had packed up and moved to another state in the midst of adversity and had somehow managed to land on my feet. She reminded me that I had once been homeless with my children and somehow managed to keep it together and still take care of them! She reminded me of my resourcefulness, my charisma, my bounce-back ability. She reminded me of the homes that I had owned and the ones that I will own again. She reminded me of my perseverance.

But there was one thing that she said to me that was so powerful, that it sticks with me to this very day. It was a statement that changed the way I see myself and the people that I attract to me. She said “Leisa, people are a reflection of us. What we see and admire in others is also in us! You are meeting these powerful women that you admire so much because YOU are a powerful woman!” She asked me if I had ever considered the fact that these women were admiring me as well. She said “you are meeting these kinds of women because that is the kind of woman YOU are, and like attracts like! Stop thinking that they have something that you do not have, and accept the fact that you are just as powerful as you think they are! Through these women God is showing you where you are and where you will be!” Talk about being put in your place!

Well, needless to say the tears began to run, not because I was sad, but because she was right! The women that I admired so much didn’t posses anything that I didn’t. I used to feel intimidated around women who seemed to have it “going on” but now I remember the words of my best friend and can sit with heads of state and know that I am supposed to be there! I will never feel intimidated again when I’m in the presence of great women, because I know that I too am great!

I want to leave you with: Know your worth and who you are! Know that you are a Divine being; an extension of God himself. Know that no matter where you are in your life, that nothing can change who you are! Know that people are a mirror reflection of us and that what you see and admire in others is most strongly in YOU. You are magnificent! You are powerful! You are valuable! You are worthy!

Never look at another woman again and be intimidated by who or what you think she is and remember when you see a woman you admire, you are looking in the mirror and seeing a reflection of YOU!

Here is a little GIFT that I want to leave you with. Its something that I listen to often to remind me of who I am. Always remember who you are!


I’m doing an all call for inspirational quotes, videos, short blogs, and articles that relate to improving self-esteem, and developing a positive body image and sense of self. We’re calling it Self-Concept Thursdays! Send your submissions to [email protected] using Self-Esteem as the subject line.

***In the meantime, leave your Positive Affirmations below!