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Curly Nikki

Self Consciousness and Natural Hair

By January 27th, 202119 Comments

Sumkindawndrfl writes:

There always seems to be much interest by natural women about the perspective of black men about women’s hair. I ask why be worried about how others feel when the journey of going natural is a personal decision? I also share my own journey in self-love which I insist made others gravitate to me. Imagine that! If we only begin to focus inward to make our selves completely self satisfactory others will want begin to treat us the way we do ourselves. People will only treat you the way you do yourself. Who’d have thought natural hair could teach a journey in self-love?


  • Anonymous says:

    Being natural (and doing the BC from APL to start fresh) has made me a better lover overall. It's amazing. My BF and I are connecting in ways that I never imagined and my friends have noticed that I'm more content with life.

    And just think…. this is the way God made me 🙂

  • SweetThang says:

    Any man that prefers that I apply poison to my hair every six weeks in order to have straight flowing hair is definitely not the man for me.

  • Miss Lesa says:

    This young lady rocks!

  • Anonymous says:

    Thanks!!! i needed this today

  • Tamara says:

    Being completely natural is one of best things I could have ever done for myself. I wouldnt change this for anything, and this is me so take me as I am.

  • tacita says:

    that was so awesome.

  • Doc says:

    love this woman!

  • Anonymous says:

    i love this! what i have found amongst most women is that they are very unmoving about definite character flaws and how it may interfere with finding a man, but they for damn sure will spit the whole "my hair has to be long, straight and flowy to get a man"! say wha? so, you'd rather justify your nasty attitude but then point to my natural hair as not good enough to get a man?! word.

    ladies, there is a pot for every lid. love yourselves and the rest will fall into place.

  • Anonymous says:

    Sumkindawndrfl is kickin' science! I co-sign on the whole video. Thanks for posting, CurlyNikki.

  • Hard Shell w/ Soft center says:

    Nothing but the truth! And thank you for such a wonderful video…

  • Chaka_Millz says:

    Thank you girl for this video… I swear I try to get this through to people all the time. When I decided to go natural it was for ME and nobody else. If anyone has a problem with it thats their problem (that includes my granny too)

  • Anonymous says:

    Hair does not make the woman… its the total package. I really do not think that black men really care THAT much, as long as the total package is neat and kempt! But for the ones who do care:

    Why would any woman want to be with a man who is so closed-minded about beauty and can not appreciate you for who you are, natural or not? Puh-lease! You are too good for that. Plus he is probably dealing with his own internal issues….

  • Anonymous says:

    I feel so much better about myself and my decision/choice of why I went natural.

  • Anonymous says:

    Great video! Well articulated points. It really does come down to self-love. Yes, it's true, you can be married and still have work to do in that area. Thanks for the honesty and sharing this.

  • Unknown says:

    Sumkindawndrfl thank you thank you thank you!! Loved what you had to say and as a fellow married natural women I can surely cosign with you on the IMPROVING yourself aspect first before anyone worries about finding a man!! We are so dynamic and I just thank you for schooling the women who have maybe still yet to get it 🙂
    Thanks CurlyNikki for this post!

  • Anonymous says:

    I can definitely identify with her. Society is going too far into another direction of wanting women to look a certain way and it is becoming insane the lengths people will go to achieve the trendy look for the moment. Women will undergo surgery, botox treatments, skin bleaching etc. Let's all be apart of bringing women back to loving themselves exactly how they are. Of course we all have our days of not agreeing with our hair even those who wear it straight that's just normal but I don't ever want to be so insecure with myself that I am applying harsh chemicals to my hair again. As far as worrying about a black man I personally have come to a juncture in my life where having a good man and one that I can bring around my family matters the most to me. I am currently in a relationship with a black man but I would not pass up a relationship with another ethinic group if I were single and this person knew how to treat me.

  • Anonymous says:

    Thank you so much for posting this video.

  • Anonymous says:

    Very well said!

  • Tiffany says:

    Great video. I hear this so much from people I know.

    Peace, Love and Chocolate

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