Friggin’ kudos and hats off to all of the super moms out there. Seriously, this is NO joke. Apparently the stakes have been upped and I need to put on the big girl panties.
The motivation to write this short post came a moment ago. I’m used to running in all directions, top speed, all the time. I’m also self-absorbed so this has been quite the adjustment period. Pre-Gia, on a typical weekend, I could hit the grocery store, goof off at the mall, walk 6 miles, blog, do my hair, laze around the house, blog, clean the house, wash the clothes, spend time with the hubs, fold the clothes, chat (gossip) with friends and watch all of my favorite Tivo’ed programs. Now that The Boss has arrived, everything has come to a screeching halt… or at least a ridiculously slow crawl. It’s Sunday and I’ve done nothing but tend to G baby. Father Abraham! This is not for the faint-hearted…
I’m a notoriously anal person- – I’m very punctual, very organized and I live and die by my thoughtfully composed to-do list. When I can’t do something I need or rather want to do ‘right now’, I freak out. Well, Gia’s learning me… my schedule no longer exists. I’m doing what I can around the incessant pumpings (every 3 hours! I swear every time I look up it’s 9pm… the day flies by when you’re living in 3 hour increments), Gia’s naps, diaper changes and fit pitchings. She’s not a fussy baby, but she’s demanding and likes to be held and entertained when she’s awake. I’m blessed in that hubby is a trooper and a great dad– we take shifts, so even though I get a few hours of sound sleep at night, and a couple of hours to myself during the day, it’s still not enough! I feel like I need 4 more hands and a couple of nannies.
Don’t believe me? I typed this whole damn post with one friggin’ hand, took 30 minutes. Gia’s wiggling in my other arm.
Rant over 🙂
Hey Nikki, I am a stay at home, homeschooling mom to three and I'm pregnant with my fourth. I love being a mom but it was a bit trying at the beginning. All of my kiddos have been demanding so I learned how to be a pro at doing things with one hand LOL! Invest in a baby carrier and "wear" Gia. She will love it and it will make your life a whole lot easier. The nursing will get easier I exclusively breast feed all of my babies because I think pumping is way to hard! Allow yourself to become a mom, let go of what your life was before and create a new reality because life is different with kids. Good luck girl, enjoy all the time you can with her because they grow very fast.
Hilarious post, but true. My little girl is about 20 months (no time to count) and sleeping in the middle of our king-sized bed (purchased to accomodate her) at this very moment, no doubt ready to wake up when I climb in so she can nurse (I've got her down to about two wakings a night, about 45 seconds each). Sister Boyd kept it real. Realize that babies are just like our hair…what works for mine may not work for yours, so please don't get caught up with well meaning advice/comments about when she'll sleep, not need so much attention, etc. Just enjoy what you can, set limits when appropriate, and let your hubby step in so you can step out!
Girl…I so feel you. My son is now 10 weeks old and yes..he demands LOTS and LOTS of attention. I, too had (still having) a hard time adjusting but each day gets a little bit easier. It will for you also. Most babies do fall into a bit of pattern and you will be able to predict what to do next.
But in the meantime I use I do use our baby swings and bouncer in between feedings. I too am breastfeeding and I was pumping every 3 hours, too. But as of few weeks ago…I have stopped pumping exclusively and started feeding him directly from breast and pump only once or twice a day. This has helped TREMENDOUSLY!! Especially during those early morning feedings.
When it does get tough…just take a deep breath and remember each day will get a little bit easier.
You are doing a great job and hang in there.
ROTFL!! Soon or later you'll start calling her Queen G!
Right now, she depends on attention from Mommy and Daddy, but give her a few months and she will learn how to entertain herself. Also, you should try the Snugglie (spelling??). It's a baby carrier. I couldn't leave my son alone more than a couple minutes because he had breathing problems as an infant. I snapped it on, dropped him in and went about my day…It was a life saver, literally. I think Target Store carries these too…look for baby carriers.
You are doing a wonderfully Nikki! ~Ms. Lisa
Oh my goodness she's such a cutie pie, even while she's crying!
Welcome to motherhood! Dont worry, this is normal, she will be out of the stage in no time…getting her on a consistant schedule will give u a HUGE break..glad to see you are acccpeting the "my me time for now is over until further notice" lol
Babies aint no joke but SUCH A BLESSING. I have been dealing with secondary infertlity for years now and I would give anything to have another little on your baby age. Enjoy it all sis!
Good book on schedule babies: Baby Wise by Ezzos
Grace to you in this new season of life
Hang in there Nikki. As a mother I definitely identify with you. When I gave birth to twins 8 years ago I got no sleep. They woke up every 3 hours for a feeding and needed to be changed. When I had my daughter almost 5 years ago she was also breastfed and woke up every hour for feedings. She was colicky and was just a fussy baby. I thank God for a supportive family. My husband woke up on some shifts so that I could get a 6 hour stretch of sleep in on some nights. When I truly needed a break from the twins, I called my mother and asked her to keep 1 for a week, and my big sister to keep 1 for a week. I slept like a baby for a week. Children definitely change your routines. Just remember that you can do it. It's ok to feel tired because you're on the babies schedule now and it's the way that we would feel if we've gone days without sleep, then add crying. Just remember that these precious gifts need us to take care of them. Their tummies are small and they digest breastmilk so fast. She'll be sleeping longer within the next few months. At 6 months my little ones were sleeping for at least 6 hours most nights of the week. Those 6 hours felt like a whole night. If you have someone that you trust invite them to stay over and assist one day, and if you can't look past cleaning perfectly for a month or so, call and get some quotes for housekeeping to assist during this time. Oh I almost forgot that I remember people saying call me if you need anything. Take them up on it, with cleaning, folding laundry, or just letting you get a nap. Hang in there Nikki. You can do it!!!! You, baby Gia, and your blog is beautiful and inspiring!!
she is so chunky!! must be the tidday lmao
but trust me, it will get better…enjoy motherhood 🙂
ahh…i know what you're going through. I've done it 4 times. It gets better – give her about another month and she'll be much more apt to sleep through the night. Three months and she'll be content just to play on the floor by herself…usually. LOL Sorry, every child is different. But it will be okay! Good luck and at least you have a supportive and awesome husband 🙂
Awwww Nikki she is a gem. I am so happy for you… I know you're probably thinking "did she read this post??"
Yes, I did and I'm so happy for you that you have this bouncing beautiful bundle of joy in your life to slow you down and demand your time and attention. Im sure you're growing in more ways that you could imagine.
I am newly married and we are planning on starting our family soon. I'm so excited.
http://kinkycurlycoilyme.com/
Nikki Girl YOU are crazy! by the time I got to the part where you called father abraham I lost it! I am laughing so hard ! You are soooo funny! You speak the truth though and in my mind I have gone back twentysomething years and I definitley can relate to what you are saying! Raina
thank you guys for the support, kind words and advice! I truly need all of it! It's encouraging to hear that it gets better and that I'm not alone. This is unlike anything I've ever experienced.
I absolutely agree with you Nik! I have a two year old, and I was just sitting with my sister and her 1 month old, thinking back to those late nights when a good nights sleep, seemed impossible (By the way, I still get no sleep!) Coupled with the fact that getting anything done, such as chores, mommy time, hubby time, work, has goten swallowed up by this little 7 pound being! I myself am anal….(or type A, as I like to say) and what I have learned is that I can't do it all. I have to sometimes stop and say to myself…"it's ok if the house it not super clean". Do what you can do, and then make sure mommy gets time. Motherhood, is such a joy, but yet a daunting task at times, but hey, I wouldn't trade it for the world. But hang in there, sooner than you know it, you'll wake up and baby Gia will be in everything! So enjoy that no crawling phase. She is beautiful, and it's a great thing that daddy helps out!
Loved this!
Keep keeping on, Motherhood is one of the toughest jobs you'll ever love! Like the peace corps! Even having a degree, done with your career and married, IT IS STILL A ROUGH JOB! My daughter is three and everyday is a new adventure! Keeping up with the website while just having a baby is nothing to sneeze at!
Congrats Nikki! You're a great mom and I've so been there. Take it one day at a time, and keep venting, it's healthy for you and entertaining for us. Keep the funny posts coming!
Congrats on your new baby, but honestly mothering one child is not that hard, especially when you are already finished with your education, done with your career, and married on top of that. I had my son as a teen and worked all through the rest of high school, college, and law school. Not to be mean, but just put the baby down and type….women (and men) do it every day.
LOL! You are too funny Nik, thanks for this!
aw Nikki! lol @ the picture, curly baby looks gorgeous even when she cries <3. I must say that you are a trooper. I honestly don't know how you still keep up with everything you have going on with the new boss in the building.
I'm just so happy for you and I pray that God will continue to give you strength! you can do it! you'll be alright girl. enjoy the journey 😉 before you know it she'll be 5.. 15!
aJ
@Curlynikki: In the words of Michael Jackson –
"…you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart…
Girl sounds like my Zach! Took me 8hrs to clean my house this past Sunday, it used to take me 2hrs. The last 2hrs I vaccumed and cleaned with him in the baby bjorn! My back is killing me.
IT GETS BETTER!!! She is already a month and some change..After about 3 months it got easier for me and my daughter and Im a single mom. I did have my moms help in the beginning though.. All you can do is take it one day at a time and each day gets a little bit better… Just enjoy these days because time flies and before you know it she will be walking, and talking, and all that good stuff!!! Women are some amazing beings!!!!!! 🙂
As the mom of a toddler with another due in December I can say that I felt/feel the same way. It's gotten much more managable but I've also changed my expectations a ton.
I'm able to get more done now but I still rarely talk to my friends – and when I do it's on my bluetooth while I'm cooking or via text during my commute.
Pumping is a pain in the arse…pumping at work while on a conference call is NOT the business! – I nursed/pumped until my little guy was ~18months old.
…and this too shall pass and before you know it you'll be thinking – "remember back when I we thought 3 hours of sleep was a luxury?"
Nikki, it will get soooo much easier. Just make sure that you give yourself time to make the necessary adjustments so that you won't stress yourself. I have 7 homeschooled kids, my oldest is 20 today and then comes the rest 17, 15, 14, 11, 6, and 3. All by one man and yes, he has a GOOD j.o.b. lol
OMG CAN YOUR BABY BE ANY CUTER! MAKES ME ALMOST WANT TO HAVE ONE!:-) *POPS BC PILL WHILE TYPING THIS*:-) LOL YOUR RANT WAS HILARIOUS..SERIOUSLY THOUGH CHILDREN ARE A BLESSING..HANG IN THERE:-)
You brought back memories! Being on the "other side" with a 9 and 6 y/o, let me tell you it all gets better…especially when you aren't looking. You realize hey I am doing this and doing it well. And it all goes by sooo very quickly, so try to be present as much as you can.
Funny, about 9 months ago I was reading through your hair routine & the tightly curly method and I tried it ONCE w/ no success. I kept thinking maybe if I try it again and really take the time…and then it hit me. I am a working mom w/ a great hubby for support but I don't have the time to do all those steps, who am I kidding? So, I modify and you know my hair looks pretty darn good. And I am sure like my house, my weight, my friendships, my hobbies (who am I kidding I don't have those anymore) they aren't perfect and could be a whole better and cleaner but we are doing the best we can. The kids are loved, safe, funny, smart, fed, housed & clothed. That is all that matters…well that and some good hair days (because you do need some time for you and it helps to look the part when all else fails)! 🙂 Hang in there!
lol girl I feel your pain! Peopl aren't lying when they say "Your life will never be the same". Mine slowed me down quite a bit. Try to establish routine as early on as possible. May make life a lil better….Maybe! You can do it and trust me you got your big girl panties because you are doing it. Every parent is allowed to vent
ooohhh join the club:) I have a 2month old and a 3 year old…. rant over!
The boppy and that green pacifier saved my life!!! Everytime I placed him on it he fell right to sleep, lol…It gets a lot easier 🙂
Hang in there little mamma! This is the fun stuff! Eventually, you both will be on the same page! It takes some time and hard work, but its so worth it! Wait until you have to potty train!! Much luv!
She is well fed, look at those thighs, lol! As many have stated, it will get better. Keep your sense of humor, and in time you will miss these days, not really but you will look back and remember them differently.
OH the joys of having a newborn!
It gets better Nik I PROMISE you! LOL! Around 9 months or so you'll slowly start to see that you ahve more time to do what you need to do. YOu will never get it fully back but you'll be happy with what you do get after the newborn stage has passed.
And yes, the days FLY by when you're living on a breastfeeding schedule. I did it for the whole first year after my son was born and were it not for all the pictures I took during that time, most of it would have been forgotten!
I'm sure you're doing a SUPER job! Welcome to mommyhood!
The delirium will pass. Everything is just a phase. When you leave this one, it will be something else. You HAVE to love it!!!
Dont feel alone 🙂 Im going through the same scenarios! lol…
Aww, that pic is so adorable…probably because it doesn't have the baby crying soundtrack attached =P I'm not a mom yet so I don't really have any useful advice. But good luck Nikki! I'm glad your hubby is there and helping out.
Hang in there with the nursing its normally what goes out the window first. I nursed three babies and they are great. Now 8, 6, and 5 I wish I had spent more time enjoying them as babies instead of checking off my todo list. Although I wasn't natural at the time I do understand what you are going through. You can do it. PS. That was friggin hilarious!!!!
Hang in there Nikki!! It gets better. Once to get into your "new" routine, you both will be fine. I know you want to get to your to-do list but try to sleep when she's sleeping. You will be surprise how much better you will feel. I love that pic of baby G. LOL!!
Hey Nikki- I wa all set to suggest the same thing as Curly Hairdo. She beat me to it, but I must say that when I had my son, I found that the Snuggly was my best friend. It gave me the freedom to do what I needed to do and tend to my son. In fact, I quickly learned that it was far more efficient than a stroller when I went to the store and on other errands. Most of the time he slept or was just happy to be close to me. If you haven't already- give it a try!
Awwww…poor thing! As always, thanks for sharing and keeping it real with us. Since I'm not a mother yet, I really appreciate these posts. Hang in there…we're all here to listen. I know it has to get better. Hugs! ~KF519
Oh, you sound exhausted!Sending big hugs a a ton of energy! *passing over a triple shot latte*
The little mademosielle is too cute!
Wow, at least you have your husband. Imagine it as a single parent. Grateful for the small things – remember that. And I'm sure it will get easier. You'll realize what you NEED to do versus what you WANT to do and shift priorities accordingly. Cute post though, even though I'm sure you were not feeling so cute about it at the time. We're all here to listen and support. 🙂
Nikki my son is nine and I've never gotten back to how I was pre-son. My house is never as clean as it use to be, there are never enough hours in a day (never), my whole life has changed (not complaining)and nothing is like it use to be, he is as messy as they come and it drives me crazy (I should have started him to cleaning at age 3 because now it is too late to get little mr. messy in shape just to clean his own room and pick up after himself. Things will get better but just in a different way don't expect things to be like they use to be that is unrealistic just make the most of things being different. Rest when you can, clean when you can, cook when you can, spend time with hubby when you can eventually you will find a rhythm that works for you and your household. Just don't hold onto how you use to be because those days are long gone but you have better days ahead.
Hang in there Nikki! I remember those days. I have two boys(13 and 6) and they seemed to have grown over night. I felt soooo overwhelmed for the first few months after having my oldest son. Trust us when we say "it gets better!" It really does. Try to sleep when she sleeps and let the housework slide for a minute. She'll be sleeping through the night before you know it. For me, motherhood made me stronger and I felt more confident because I knew, if I could handle being a mom and a wife, I could do anything!
Oooo, someone was NOT happy when that picture was taken! LOL! But, she's still a cutie-pie. 🙂 Hang in there, Nikki. You're doing fine; it's an adjustment period for you and little Gia. She'll let you get a little more sleep and "me" time in the months to come.
aw poor baby. try doing all that as a single parent! lol
Aww! This is me giving you a giant big HUG! I know exactly how you feel. And, I'm gonna be honest, because you just were, too! – lots of babies don't sleep through the night at 4 months old. – these moments may never seem like they flew by. – Things will never be the same.
They do become a new normal, though. and there's peace and solace in that! Think about the good times and you'll make it through.
Have you tried using a baby carrier? That was a LIFESAVER for me! It took a few tries to get it to work right, but it was like a miracle made out of fabric. <3 (maya wrap, mei tai, etc. google "babywearing")
and don't worry, you'll get faster at your one-handed typing! Trust me! 😀
I feel you CN! I was laughing because I know the story all too well. I'm still trying to adjust myself. As soon as I finished reading your post, my 3 year old and my 14 month old just burst into my room. I thought they were sleeping!.LOL It's after 11pm already!
I definitely feel you. I had my son on aug 31 and I have an 18 month old son. I managed to do my hair in an hour and fifteen minutes(!) Today while my newborn was sleeping. Its been hard adjusting this past month but I've learned how to feed a toddler, nurse an infant and read the cat in the hat aloud all at once lol. Hang in there though, in a few months you'll be longing for these days when you could lay the baby on the bed, go to the bathroom and know that they'll be in the same spot when you come back.
YOU SOUND LIKE ME WELCOME TO MOTHERHOOD IT WILL BECOME EASY AS TIME GOES BY
=p
girl its a shame they don't warn ya! LOL! while you wouldn't give them back, it is quite challenging to adjust to not being in control, especially when you are a control and organize freak like you and i are. hang in there, while it won't get better right away, pray for strength and keep venting/sharing and that will make it more tolerable.
Baby Gia is like where is my milk mama in that picture.lol..lol.. My neice would do the shakes while craving for her mothers breastmilk, we would call the milk her crack addiction.lol.. But after a couple of months you will get into a routine that works out well for you, and then you can sigh and breathe again. TO Sownbrooklyn I give you props 4 kids all 5 and under, wow you are definitely superwoman. I personally don't have kids as of yet, but when I do about 2 or 3 kids 2yrs apart. I have a younger sister but were 6yrs apart and have nothing in common, and not close, I told myself that I would have my kids closer in age just 2or 3yrs separating them. But anyway have fun with your little one CN and welcome to mommyhood for life.
OMG!! by the time i got to the end I was done..lol Welcome to motherhood Nikki…in due time u will be back to having things organized…Enjoy while she is still small because once they start talking watch out..lol
Awwww. Well you are handling it like a champ.
awww….that's a cute pic!!
Hey there, I just wanted to say welcome to MOTHERHOOD! It's noooo joke. It's all still brand new, having a baby is a life changing event. But trust me, as time goes on, this whole adjustment period will become your norm. Everything that you do will just become 2nd nature and you won't even think about your pre-parent life in the same way. Don't get me wrong there will be times when you wish man, if only…. But then Gia will do something that will make your heart smile. Hang in there and take it one day at a time. Dont try to be supermom, she doesn't exist, lol. Take care and be blessed.
Awww, it will get better trust me, all of us mothers have gone through it. Before you know it she is up walking and talking and believe it or not you will miss these day lol. Hang in there, she is beautiful
hilarious post as always nikki. I pray this time goes smoothly and quickly for you! You're the best!
Hey Nikki:
I'm not a mom as yet, but I so agree with "Sister Boyd": some things can wait. You have precious time with baby Gia that is priceless. Modify your schedule and prioritize what is necessary. In the mean time, don't be afraid to ask for help, (if you have loved / trusted ones near by). I'm sure they will be eager to assist.
Praying for you as you get over this hurdle.
Peace / Blessings from NYC
Hang in there, girl! You can do it! These kids I have make me literally cry sometimes. Doesn't have anything to do with the kids. It's just that being a mother is HARD! But it's oh so worth it. Peace and love to you and that beautiful baby.
awwww…it's gonna be ok! You're doing a great job mommy! Enjoy every moment cause it will fly by!!
You'll be fine Nikki, once you both get into a routine. I remember those days. She is adorable though.
Ahh, she's adorable. Boy do I have those memories.
Peace, Love and Chocolate
Tiffany
Beautiful baby!! I too was caught in the endless nursing/diaperchange/sleep cycle. But nursing has gotten much better (8months stong!!!).I have to agree with Anon above. Right around 6 weeks my sweetheart realized she had lungs. The nights were a mess I thought i would pass out. Then all of a sudden(around 3-4 months) she was sleeping through the night. It was like a magic switch turned on. And after this traumatic stage this is when their cuteness sucks you in so much that you can't wait to have another little one.
Hang in there. Love your post! I used to be a number one slacker until I had my first child. After that, I was following schedules and making lists that even the strictest drill seargent would be proud of. My oldest made me pick up my pace, maybe baby G is trying to relax yours a little. I think you're accomplishing more in a day than I could get done in a week! Great job mommie!
Ohhh child, posts like this make me more determined to remain child-free. I couldn't imagine giving up my time like that…maybe in 10 years when I am almost 40! lol
Seriously, Gia is a beautiful little baby, and I think you are doing a great job. It's just an adjustment…You have 18 years to get it down just right!! You'll be fine, dear 🙂
–RiRi
It gets better right around the time you think you can't stand it anymore. Then all of a sudden she sleeps for 6-8 hours and you feel like a new woman. In the meantime, don't try to be Superwoman.
In the meantime, get one of those bouncy, vibrating chairs. It will at least buy you an hour to relax without holding her and as cliched as it sounds, sleep when she's sleeping. You'll be glad you did.
My second child is approaching 13 months so last year at this time I was going through the same thing.
Hang in there Nikki….lol….That is why I always refer to tha first child as your "Golden Child"….They break you of every habit you have….You will never be tha same…In a good way:-)…By tha time I had my second one me and my hubby had tha hang of it…Now we have our "Golden Child" who broke us in and now the "Love Bug" who keeps us on our toes….But enjoy every moment of it… Cause like with our hair these are moments we won't ever get back:-) My Golden Child is now 15 and i hardly remember those all nighters…Have a wondeful day!
Welcome to the mom club! As a mother of a teenager my advice is to sit down and enjoy your little one. Just as you're noticing times flies, it doesn't slow with the older they get. Soon she'll be walking and talking. And before you know it she'll be where my son is. I miss those times when he was your baby's age and we could just sit and be. I know you have things that need your attention, but really they can wait. The world won't end. But you and your baby need this time. Enjoy it;) Soon she'll be too big to fit in that one arm and she'll be running out of the door with her friends…with your money hahahaha
SisterBoyd
Nikki…
My son is almost 11 months old and I feel like super woman because I have yet to pass out. Babies are blessings but it seems almost a taboo if we dare share the difficulties they also bring. It gets better and the days she begins to sleep through the night, you swear Jesus is literally cradling you in his arms. It's such an amazing transformation when you have it down pat!
I remember those days! It gets better – so soon. And yes, the kids are the boss of our schedules, but that's okay – I like it better this way! When her sleep gets settled and she finds entertainment without being in your arms you will feel amazing that you got through it – it makes you feel like supermom in the end! I think you're doing amazing – who can blog with an infant? Just enjoy it because remember: "Small babies = small problems" such a good little phrase while it may seem unlikely, it's very accurate. Enjoy the moments!
This really made me laugh! I always say that people focus on the loss of the wrong things when talking about having children. "Me" time is on a serious and limited budget. Add in one or more kiddies (I have 4, three 5 and under) and it is pretty well non-existent if you don't learn to multi-task. You can do it, girl! Child care DOES count and your blog post is done even if it took 30 mins ;o)
Nikk, (LOL) Girrrll, I'm rollin' with laughter at how your world has completely changed with baby Gia here. I agree with Teach9798 (Laura), things are a bit hectic for you now but before you know it, time will fly by and you will be remembering these things as the past. You're doing great so just keep moving, day by day, hour by hour and sometimes minute by minute. (smile)
Allnatural1 (Michelle in Texas)
lol, CN you are crazy! It'll get better, but in the meantime keep the funny rants coming.
Hang in there Nikki! Soon her feedings will space out and your pumpings will space out as well:-) Try to remember it will only be like this for a short time. She'll sleep longer, she'll eat more at feedings, and you will have a moment to pee;-)
Great job with the nursing! Keep up the good work, it's all worth it in the end.
xoxo
Laura
(chick who sent you the email about milk donation)
Ah, welcome to my world! Just wait until you have another one…the space-time continuum goes into warp speed!