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Curly Nikki

Curl Friends- They Are All Around You!

By January 27th, 202113 Comments

Curl Friends- They Are All Around You!

by ReignElle of

At a time when women are portrayed like they just cant get along, there seems to be a pivotal change of reality I see among women on a daily basis. Living in a city like New York, welcoming eyes and friendly smiles from woman-to-woman are so foreign, that when it does happen it seems a bit strange. But I must say women are becoming much friendlier to each other and one of the biggest icebreakers that I have seen is hair. Yes hair! There is a heightened sense of community and togetherness that I have never witnessed.

There is a community building among women who are natural, women who are transitioning, and women who are admirers of natural hair. It amazes me that something like hair is bringing women together in ways that has never happened before. In general, going natural is usually a choice inclusive of women who move to a similar mindset regarding haircare, self-esteem and beauty. Aside from the normal banter I notice more and more women finding a common solace; the familiarity of the enigma that is our hair. The natural movement is definitely spreading and within familiar circles, friendships are fostering changes that may not have been possible before. From my experience, going natural on your own can be rough when you haven’t seen anyone go through the experience firsthand. Yet being a beacon of natural curls definitely has its impact and influence within your personal circle; don’t be surprised when your friends join you.
A curl friend can be anyone that supports you, shares a sentiment with you, compliments you, or even those who criticize you. All of these people really help to define your thoughts, your passions and your confidence about your hair. My curl friends are a great support system for me. They gave me the confidence I didn’t know I had, and pushed me to continue on this path. So let your your hair down–literally! Smile and walk proudly because if you don’t, you may find a curl sister reminding you. Besides you are inspiring women and you don’t even realize it.
So when you see another women looking at you, you may find that it comes from a good place. You will find the occasional stare or glance is usually accompanied by a smile, and most times a conversation. So as you discover the trials and tribulations of your crown and glory, remember you are not going through it alone.

Do you have Curl Friends?
Share your experiences below!


  • Anonymous says:

    i encounter most of my curl friends at work. We have conversations all the time about our natural hair journeys.

  • Anonymous says:

    I get my support from smile(the saints at church). The ladies are all natural. I Thank God for the hair he has given me

  • Anonymous says:

    Rae, great article and even better picture.LOL Love the way you described this deeper connection among women and hair, and its not just Black women. Living in Italy with my hair out now allow me to notice the 2 different types of people that I would not pay attention to in NYC: 1. there is the White Person who LOVES MY HAIR (man or woman) and so interested in what its doing and how come it look so different everyday. 2. Then there is the Confused person who wants to know what is my hair doing and if its even hair because they have never seen hair like mine. So yes not many Curl-Friends here, and the ones I see only speak French, but glad I have YOU!!!

  • JW says:

    A good amount of my close friends have all gone natural. Its usually a whole squad of us walking around we just all have different lengths, colors and 1 has locks.

  • Anonymous says:

    I have a co-worker that is like a hair buddy, so we pretty much encourage each other.

    BTW I'm not sure what part of NYC the author lives / frequents, but I do encounter friendly smiles. I think that since 9-11 people have "softened up".

  • Nelly says:

    I wish I had a pic to add to this comment. This past weekend my two closest friends and one of their sisters were hanging our and catching up. I looked around the room and we were all at various stages of naturalness. I was the first (since 2003) but within the last few years they have followed suit (one is transitioning and planning to big chop at the end of the month). I thought we all looked amazing, beautiful, and proud.

  • My God Given Hair 10 says:

    I have been really fortunate because all my besties are natural or either transitioning. One of my girl friends is still rocking her curls after having recently ran a perm through her hair. She was frustrated because she missed her straight hair. It’s all good, she’s happier now and that’s all that really matters. Many of my immediate co-works are natural too. Its def nice to be able share our natural experiences and have that support system. Since going natural more family and friends are more encouraged watching me in my natural journey. Since I’m obsessed with all things natural hair, I’m always ready to engage in conversation or share hair care tips. Somehow I’ve involved into the go to person for friends and family…I’m loving every minute of it!

  • My God Given Hair 10 says:

    This comment has been removed by the author.

  • Ayanna Blueford says:

    Love this post! I've noticed it too! All my friends, family, and especially my boo supports me! I love my hair, my curls and the versatility and creativity is endless! I big chopped my daughter in October, my mom big chopped in January and I stopped pressing, heat, flat ironing last August…I just came back from my pilates class and with pressed hair I had to always wrap it up and hope and pray it wouldn't curl up on me, but now I'm free to exercise as much as I want, whenever I want and still look like a diva from beginning to end! :-)

  • carolinacurls says:

    My sorority sisters have become my curl friends. Quite a few of them transitioned before and with me. They made sure I was on the right path with my transition and gave me courage during my BC. They continue to motivate me with their advice and helpful tips. It's great to have such a large support system given so many of us are going/have gone natural. Our bond continues to strengthen.

  • Lady Jaye says:

    I don't have anything useful to add (yet), but I love this post!!

    kay. gotta run.

  • 12monthspost says:

    My curl friend has the my big sis she did the big chop and proudly wears a Twa and i love her confidence.I'm 12 months post and plan to cut my relaxed ends in a years time.

  • socialitedreams says:

    my best friend was my curl friend because she'd been natural before (without really knowing what she was doing, lol, and decided to perm again) but she helped me with braiding my hair, washing, styling, etc. now SHE is natural again and I get to feed her knowledge and product recommendations :) Mom went natural too and was a big help for my natural journey, finding me products and other curly heads to emulate.


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