Too early to potty train? ‘Cause lil mayhem just pee’d all over me.
We were chilling in the bed, enjoying a lazy Saturday, talking to my dad on FaceTime. Gia, per her usual, used me for leverage to pull up on. She was smiling at my dad, pointing at the phone… hamming it up. Then I heard the velcro on her diaper. I laughed and told my dad what she had done, angling the phone down so he could see the rogue diaper. He interrupted my laughs and said, ‘Nik, looks like she’s trying to do something’. It did appear that way… she was concentrating hard. But I didn’t think much of it because she wasn’t grunting. She’s a very vocal pooper. The next thing I know, G had pissed all over my freshly washed linens… all over me.. all down her legs. She had the nerve to be standing there holding her dress up in the air… looking at me like ‘do something ’bout the ish’.
I’ve taken the other abuses sitting down. I can handle the melt downs (where she can think of no other appropriate course of action but to claw her own damn face), her unwillingness to give me sugar, her uncanny ability to detect and disrupt my attempts to initiate sexy time with the hubs… hell, even her batting and swinging at me when I tell her ‘no’ or ‘stop’. But when you’re grown enough to remove your diaper, hold your dress up, and pee on me… I just… I can’t.
Other than that, things are going swimmingly! Boog is pulling up on any and everything, cruising around the furniture, babbling, saying ‘dadada’, signing milk ALL DAY (Lawdy! She needs to learn a new sign), eating off my plate, waving hi and bye, and crawling at top speeds around the house. She’s a handful… but a total blessing and joy to have in our lives. Tonight, however, we are dropping her off at the sitters and heading to a wedding reception. So I need to wrap this up… gotta take down my hair and figure out a way to jerry-rig these national geographic titis… amp ’em up or something. Boobs are ghastlier than a thousand ghouls. But I breastfed for nearly 9 months… and like hubby said, I earned ’em!
p.s. If I end up looking hot tonight, I’ll definitely take pics and share!
My triflin’ arse will be washing my hair next weekend I think…
The photographer Joe Payne was amazing and caught us… ahem… in action 😉
am I ‘on one’ in this pic?