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Curly Nikki

A Change is Gonna Come- Kenny’s Corner

By September 22nd, 20219 Comments
by Kenny of

I hear from many prominent black people, about the glory of black hair.

“I would say that hair is a woman’s glory and that you share that glory with your family.” -Maya Angelou

But African American society seems largely to only promote the hair of black women, black men’s hair largely is expected to take a backseat. And if a black man does show an interest in his appearance and puts time and effort into his hair, then he is usually viewed as homosexual or DL.

The root of the natural hair movement is about returning to our roots (no pun intended), to celebrate that which defines us as a culture. It’s also a celebration and embracing of our African ancestry. But some things got lost in translation.

As a male of African descent in the West, if I care about my appearance in particular my hair I am shunned by my female peers. But, In most parts of northern Africa, male beauty be it athleticism or vanity is openly flaunted in elaborate ceremonies, featuring lavish costumes and wild hairstyles and hair adornments.

However when it comes to the West someone like Nicki Minaj or Lady Gaga can wear endless amounts of colorful wigs, and get applauded by crowds of adoring fans. But when a man wears a toupee or a hair piece he is met with jeers and laughs?! How many times have people laughed at Donald Trumps toupee?

I suppose double standards go both ways. Men will hold women to a certain status quo, and women will do the same for men.

But some people will inevitably go against what society tells them they should be like. And society will try to hammer these “nails” that stick out down. But as Sam Cooke said “a change is gonna come!”

What say you?


  • Anonymous says:

    Great video!

    I think its awesome. I see this as no different than going out to the club/bar and rating the guys on their appearance and demeanor. Just a way more interesting way too do it!

  • brunettefury says:

    I've seen videos of the Wodaabe tribe and their culture's super interesting! I love that video.

    I think people should keep in mind that many of the opinions we have are socialized, not necessarily the way the world should be, but how society forces us to think that this is the way the world should be.

    Anything deemed feminine is seen as weakness, which is why when men have more feminine qualities (in Western culture anyway), they're shunned. It's more acceptable for women to emulate men because we've been conditioned to believe that we should strive to be more like the "stronger sex"…and at the same time, women get criticized for not being feminine enough because you can't be TOO much like a man since men are threatened by that. A man can't be feminine AT ALL and is expected not to do certain things (not to wear his hair long, not to show emotion, not to be interested in cooking and cleaning and child rearing) because those things are relegated to the "weaker sex." It's sort of ridiculous the expectations that people have.

  • Anonymous says:

    I actually saw a video very similar to this in a cultural anthropology class. It was the same ritual but in a different community…interesting to say the least lol

  • Anonymous says:

    I laughed at the narrator's comment "… a night of desert passion"

  • LaLaCurls says:

    Wow! Thanx for sharing the vid, it was very interesting and eye opening. I agree with Amber wholeheartedly; why IS it ok for a woman to be versatile and able to do many of the things we deem to be a "male's job", but when it's vice versa, we castrate the man?? We need to become united as a people and stop with all the stereo typing.
    P.S. Thanx for hosting such a great site Nikki! Your blog is not only helpful and resourceful, but extremely uplifting and inspirational. I love it keep up the GREAT work!!

  • mothereartha says:

    it made me very sad….

  • CURLYNIKKI says:

    ^^^^ LOL @ amber's last sentence. Poor lil' tink tink.

  • Amber says:

    But we laugh at Donald Trump's toupee because it's obviously bad and he (supposedly) has enough money to make it not so obviously bad!

    I think we go through so much to make sure that women are allowed to know there's more than one kind of way to be a woman, but don't do that for our men (of all races). We shun the man with a bit of flare for hair but embrace the athletic women. We titter about a man who can sew behind his back but if a woman can fix a car we give her infinite props.

    I love a man with an amazing head of hair. Personality is more important to me of course, but if a guy has great hair and obviously cares for it, it gives him a bit of an edge for me.

    (And thanks for sharing the video! I was almost in tears when he didn't get chosen. Hang in there! You'll do better next year!)

  • LaNeshe says:

    That video was SO interesting!

    As far as the post, I think it's unfair that a man who cares about his appearance and hair should be shunned or put into any type of stereotype.

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