image courtesy of NecoleBitchie

By Candice Selby of Simplistic Chic

Hey ladies!

Just wanted to dish about Black Girls Rock, an awards show which aired on BET this past Sunday. Did you see it? This show honored women and girls of color, encouraging empowerment and positive self-development. It was a well put-together show hosted by Tracee Ellis Ross and Regina King, and it featured artists such as Erykah Badu, Jill Scott and, the new girl on the block, Elle Varner (I’m in love with her hair!). Business women, activists and other phenomenal women were also recognized. I felt so inspired and moved to make some more changes in my life and the lives of others after watching this show.

One of my highlights? Tatyana Ali (you may remember her as Ashley from the show, The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air), received the ‘Young, Gifted and Black’ award. During her acceptance speech, she read a letter that she wrote to her younger self. If you didn’t see it, click here.

It was a beautiful letter which prompted me to write my own letter to my younger self. I had a difficult time getting started because I couldn’t decide where to begin for some reason! After I got started though, the words (and tears) just flowed. Writing this letter was like therapy for me. Anyway, here it goes:

Dear Candice,

Focus on learning how to have a real relationship with God. When you focus on Him, everything else really does fall into place. It also helps you to know how to truly love yourself and others and be better equipped to recognize what real love is when it presents itself.

The right man will come along, and he will know how to respect and love you in all of the ways you ever imagined. Just be patient and know that he will come. In the meantime, you may come across some ‘frogs’. Take it as a learning experience that will help you to recognize and appreciate the prince. Don’t be bitter or hold grudges against those who are incapable of respecting and loving you. Learn from it and keep it moving. Also realize that just as you have been hurt, you may hurt someone else along the way.

Surround yourself with people who are ambitious, encouraging and have your best interest at heart. Having a great “team” is one of the keys to a successful life. With positive and inspiring people around you, you will be able to accomplish anything.

Learn to love your big hair, slender frame, high forehead and reserved demeanor. It is what makes you Candice. One day you will want all of that hair and slender frame back. Lol! Get to know you and what it is to truly love yourself.

Safeguard your body and your mind. I really can’t stress this enough. These are the two components that make up your very existence. Be very mindful of who you give your body to and who you allow to influence your mind. Not everyone who comes willing is worthy. Once they have misused these two things, your spirit will forever be changed.

Be confident in your abilities, learn from your mistakes, learn how to forgive yourself and others, and always strive to fulfill all of wildest dreams. There may be some dark days when it feels like the world is on your shoulders but know that things always get better if you have faith and persevere until the end.

Girl, you are beautiful, smart and you have it going on! You were created for a special purpose; carry yourself as such every day. Don’t sweat the small stuff (and trust me, most of it is small stuff). Lastly, have fun and make the most of each day!

Love,
Your 30 year-old self

What would you tell your younger self?