Skip to main content
Curly Nikki

Looking Back and Letting Go

By January 27th, 202123 Comments

Looking Back and Letting Go

by Andrea Dawn

A few months ago I discovered yoga. I had heard about its physical and mental benefits, and I wanted to check it out. After the first class, I was hooked. Like my big chop, why hadn’t I done this sooner? After a few sessions I was standing taller, feeling stronger and thinking clearer.
One day I was in class, quietly trying to master the Warrior 2 pose. Anyone who has practiced yoga knows this can be a tricky pose: right arm extended in front, left arm extended behind, left hip back, right knee bent, belly in, shoulders over the hips, gaze forward. In my determination to master the pose, I didn’t notice I was looking backward to check my form.
But my yoga instructor certainly noticed.

“Andrea!” he shouted, his sharp voice destroying the Zen-like vibe of the yoga studio. A few sets of inquisitive eyes glanced at me, then politely looked away.

“Stop looking back!” the instructor continued. “There’s nothing back there for you!”

I quickly shifted my gaze forward, where it was supposed to be. Embarrassed? At that moment, yes. But later that evening I reflected on his words, and I found the lesson.

The truth is I was looking back in many areas of my life, not just in my Warrior 2 pose. I had recently moved from a large city where I had a good job with great pay and benefits, to a small community 3000 miles away where jobs weren’t so easy to find. I was discouraged. Every day I was looking back, thinking about what I had left behind, wondering if moving had been a mistake. This “looking back” mentality wasn’t helping me. If anything it was blocking my ability to move forward in the new life I had chosen.

My yoga instructor’s words impacted me far beyond the yoga studio. They helped me begin the process of letting go of what I once had, and search for the new opportunities that lay ahead of me.

It’s easy to look back, whether it’s in regard to one’s natural hair journey, a life situation, a personal disappointment, the road not taken…the list is endless. Looking back can be beneficial if a lesson can be learned and applied. But in the end, forward is the only way to go.

In your life, is there something you’re “looking back” at that you need to let go of?

**************************************

CN Says:
A friend and very wise business woman recently reminded me that
it’s hard to drive a car forward by looking in the rearview mirror. CHURCH.

23 Comments

  • Anonymous says:

    Yes, yes there is one thing I need to let go of and let it lay there and stop trying to form it into a new reality. Thank you for the post.

  • monniej says:

    this was so beautiful to read and so timely for me. my problem is not so much the looking back, but most certainly the letting go. trying to drag things into the present that should be left in the pass. trying to hold on to youth and physical beauty instead of truly being able to enjoy the metamorphosis i'm experiencing at this time in my life. i want to be able to accept and release myself from the need to be seen as beautiful outside so i can experience the beauty within myself with no masks, enhancements or reservations. thanks so much for just a few moments of clarity. 🙂

  • Anonymous says:

    Yes I need to stop lookin back at the kitchen table and move on to the gym~maybe I'll succeed in the New Year!!

  • Anonymous says:

    What a really great post! I am in the midst of contemplating of whether a relationship I am in with a man that I absolutely love for who is worth it at this point…and what makes it tougher is that my relationship with a best girlfriend is no longer & I find myself is sadness and emotionally hurt from what was….So in all a humbling "thank you" is much appreciated for posting this & giving God the glory with heal all past hurt in order for us to receive the great blessings to come! Happy Glorious Sunday!

  • Anonymous says:

    This was meant for me today…I live with so much regrets about so many things. I've been trying to work on that for a while, but now I'm having a relapse. This message will help me refocus my commitment in letting go and forgive myself.

  • Anonymous says:

    @ Anonymous 1:50- Thank you for your insight.

  • Anonymous says:

    This is a message at the perfect time. We are about to "zoom" into the new year and I have been looking back quite a bit at "WHAT USED TO BE" but this post was a gentle reminder that it is passed and I need to look and move forward. Brand New is just around the corner. Thanks for sharing.
    Allnatural1 (Michelle In TX)

  • Anonymous says:

    Anonymous 7:38 pm. Do what you really want to do. If you don't then they win and you loose. I've found that people who diss you when you're not doing what they want, will "diss" you because you do what they want. Either way you loose. Your relationship is based on "love with conditions" and that never works. If your relationship is flawed in your natural state; it will be flawed when you're straight.
    Your hair and their reaction is the universe sending you a strong lesson about yourself and how you handle crisis. Go inward and learn more about yourself. What would happen in a world where everyone just "gives in" to the status quo? What kind of world would that be? Perhaps, it's time for you to move on to different people with different interests. You can still love them for who they are; but you also must love yourself for who you are. Don't look back. The answer lies in you.

  • Anonymous says:

    I always say…you can't get the blessings waiting for you if you're looking backwards! Some relationships and friendships aren't meant to last forever, but only for a season and to learn some lesson from the experience.

  • Anonymous says:

    Anony 12:43, I too have an old friendship I'm trying to move on from, it's a sad situation. We were close and thought we'd always be. I guess time and circumstances have intervened. The part that hurts the most is that our mother's were friends for years, years ago… And their friendship fizzled as well. Such is life, I guess.

  • Anonymous says:

    Anonymous, I, too, lost someone that I thought I loved dearly. I still miss him very much. But this post reminded me too to stop looking back because there really is nothing back there for me. I get tempted to call him sometimes but I know I must continue to move forward.

  • Anonymous says:

    yelp I'm looking back at an old friendship that I really need to let go of and move forward!

  • Rebwar says:

    Thank you.

  • Luscious Mahogany says:

    Very powerful message….thank you because I needed it!!

  • Anonymous says:

    Amen to this! A much needed aha! moment. Seems like nothing is going right and it's hard not to worry… But looking forward in spite of.

  • Jeannette says:

    WOW…this came right on time. Been thinking about certain things in the past lately and I MUST let them go, that is no longer my reality…like Andrea said, "looking forward is the only way to go." Thanks…I needed this :).

  • Anonymous says:

    I've been natural for 2 months and every day I look back and wonder if I should relax my hair again. I'm getting so much negativity from my family and friends, I don't know if I can handle the pressure.

  • Anonymous says:

    I can't let go of my ex. He left me for my best friend . I still love him so much. I don't know how to stop looking back. I lost my love and my best friend at the same time.

  • Anonymous says:

    I too just left a job of 14yrs and moved to a new town. Looking to do something different, its difficult when things don't just fall into place as you may have hoped. I am happy that this post has reminded me that I have much to look forward to!

  • Anonymous says:

    it's funny how reading or hearing a few words can change your entire mindset. I feel like I just got slapped. Definitely needed to see this.

  • Anonymous says:

    And this is why I love yoga. You learn so much about what keeps you from being "whole" or "united within". Thanks for sharing this. Time to look at the "now". Let the rest take care of itself.

  • Chai says:

    love the honestly! Discovered the amazingness that is yoga earlier this year…and I have to tell you…it is EVERYTHING!! your mind, spirit, body, senses…errything is greatly benefited. & the best part is, it carries through so many other aspects of your life. I'd encourage everyone to try at least one class and be as open to the experience as possible;)

  • Anonymous says:

    i needed this. thank you.

Leave a Reply