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Curly Nikki

Natural Hair Mommy Woes

By January 27th, 202128 Comments
by Angela of WiseCurls
Natural Hair Mommy WoesWiseCurl Kid Little J

I’m not always the best natural hair mommy, I’ll admit. More times than I’d like, WiseCurlKid Little J rocks her hair in a puff. It comes down and is re-twisted each night of course, but for the most part, that puff is there either laid to the side or posted strong in the middle. She loves it and it’s an uber easy style to do for those hectic mornings getting ready for school. But when the puff has overstayed its welcome and it’s time to do actually do some hair, the natural hair mommy woes commence without a hitch:

Natural Hair Mommy Woes
WiseCurl Kid:

• “Mommy, how long is this going to take?”
• “How many more do you have?”
• “Are you almost done, mommy?”
• “My back hurts”
• “My neck hurts”
• “Mommy, how much lonnnnnnggger!?”
• “Are you done, mommy? Mommy? Moooooommmmmmyyyy?!”

And then she has THE nerve to do this:

Natural Hair Mommy Woes
Jesus take the wheel!

I don’t know what it is about a mom’s hands, but shortly after a good wash, condition, scalp massage, and not even three braids in, little J is knocked out! Help me somebody! Sure, the interrogation has stopped, but a whole new set of natural hair mommy woes has set in:

• “Oh shoot! Can she breathe!? Please don’t let me suffocate my baby!”
• “Am I hurting her ear?!”
• “Am I hurting her neck!?”
• “Is that….DROOL…on my leg!?”
• “My neck…my back…my neck and my back! I need a backetomy!”

Natural Hair Mommy WoesFinished Product

No matter how many times “keep your head still” is said or how many times I call her name, or even the drool she leaves after she’s had enough during our hair session, the natural hair mommy woes are all worth it.

What are some of the woes you and your daughter share?


  • Niko says:

    Mommy woes…. down to the exact words from beginning to the sleepy end!! I have a 5yr old and as her hair gets longer and thicker ….Its a situation I dont even like to deal with. Her hair is down her back. My remedy is the old skool blue magic hair grease. which helps at times…. *sigh* but I really think it just keeps it moisturized. Smh!!

  • shesweet says:

    Washing my daughters hairs is the hardest. She hates rinsing as well as detangling. I find that brading keeps the moisture in her hair the longest but she has a problem sitting still. I repeatedly hear,"Are you done yet?" Mommy hurry up please while she swirming.

  • Anonymous says:

    My mommy woe is twofold. I can not braid, cornrow to save my life. I spent my whole life from childhood with dreadlocks and just recently did a big chop. So both me and little momma can look a fuzzy head mess at times. But Im really struggling cause my daughter has such ultra dry hair. You put grease in it and two hours later is is bone dry. I condition it every night and morning and its still dry. I can not find a product that can help this child's hair hold moisture. Please let me know of any thing for this. She has thin hair that is the same texture as cotton and its curly when it wet but once dry is like a halo of cotton around her head. I have tried natural stuff, old fashioned grease. Im at my wits end with this!!!

  • Anonymous says:

    Love the post!! I have 2 daughters (3 & 5 yr old) and I have the same mommy woes and they say the same thing your daughter says. I lay them both on the kitchen counter for wash n condition and this is what I hear from the oldest…"mommy, how many more times you gonna wash my hair"…now, I just wash one good time and then I condition which only totals 2 washes in her mind. So, why do I get the question every time? They both are very good when it comes to getting their hair braided. Both have lots of hair!! I cornbraid and the style usually lasts 3-4 weeks. So, I justify the work by calculating the number of times a year (even though it's time consuming when I do it) I actually do their hair and that makes it all better + seeing the end result is awesome, also.

  • Anonymous says:

    This too funny and true. Do these kids have a play book at shcool that they use, because I get the same exact questions, in that order. LOLOLOLOL!!! But looking at the finished product and seeing her smile beam at being "cute" takes all the stress away.

  • Izoela says:

    We do the tv and a snack method, and I can't tell you how many, "Mommy I can't see!" I get. On top of the pushing the hair out of her face when I'm trying to part. Geesh, for a kid that loves showing off her new do it's an uphil battle to get there, LOL.

  • Unknown says:

    Oh and when she was younger I used to start her hair while she was awake and then she would take a nice long nap. It had to be done early in the day cause if I waited too late she would be up staring at me at 2 a.m. and laughing at me cause I actually expected her to go to sleep. Sometimes I could get away with a good movie or a book and lots of breaks. It was the same with my son. He had a head full of hair until he was 6 and requested that it be cut off.

  • Unknown says:

    My daughter still to this day does not like putting her head all the way in the water when getting her hair wash. I mean she is 11 and she washes her hair by herself now and she still doesn't like it. She is getting better but there are still a few times that she has to wash her hair more than once cause she doesn't like getting it wet. Oh and she does the reaching her hand up and seeing how much longer I have to go to finish her hair.

  • Tanya says:

    She has gorgeous hair, kudos to you!

  • Anonymous says:


  • Anonymous says:

    LOL at this post!!! My now 17 year old daughter was every bit of this post… she too would fall asleep – after complaining about everything under the sun and I would wind up with tired fingers, and an achey back.

    I think her slob perpetually cured me of knee ash! LOL :)

  • Fenaye says:

    I love this post! My Lil mama is 3 and always says, "Mommy you touched my ear". She never goes to sleep, but I've found that the Lion King movie and a snack work wonders. :-)

  • Anonymous says:

    O…M..G!! I can sooo relate! Glad to know Im not the only one. Only my lil one doesnt go to sleep…instead the questions are constant and then I have to add the "mommy I cant see the tv if my head is down" Grrr…. ;-) lol!

  • Eliza and Zoe's mom says:

    I understand. MY daughter has very thick 3b, 3c hair down to her bottom. She is only three, so I always keep her hair in protective styles, which I do every week. She has gotten to the point where she just lets me do it as long as she has a good movie. But if the movie has too much music, she wants to dance the whole time. When she is tired of my doing her hair, she asks if her hair is pretty. This means are you done yet. If I say yes, she gets up, if I say no, she makes me feel bad for staying her hair is not pretty. Mommy woes can't really give you the blues.

  • TwinsMommy says:

    Guuuuurrrrrl… I am all too familiar with those natural hair mommy woes! I have 4yr. old twins and lawd do they do THE most on wash day. Both have very different hair characteristics but the one with the loosest curl pattern and the thickest hair has the nerve to be tender-headed.*sigh* With hits like, "Mommy, you got my face wet!" and "MOM-Eee.. you're hurting me" or "Mommy, my bottom is tired"… my, "Lawd It's Wash Day" compilation album STAY on repeat on Saturdays… *sigh*, C'est la vi.

  • ladyhart says:

    LOL love the post. Let me just say that my daughter is 10 months and she always falls a sleep when I do her hair. I just did flat twist all over her head into a cute little style, and she slept like a baby. I kept wonder was she okay because one minute she would snore (lol) and next she would stop. She loves getting her hair done though so I hope that last.

  • Anonymous says:

    I have two girls. One is 10 and the other 7.

    They both have lots of hair. I did the 7 yo's hair last night;wash, deep condition while she played in the tub, then out for some detangling, four big twists until morning and a little time under the dryer because 8 hours later? Her hair still ain't tryin to hear that 'i'm dry!' stuff.

    Tonight it's the 10 yo's turn.

  • Jay-Jay says:

    I was just braiding my daughter's hair last night, she fell asleep and when she woke up, I was done. She's 9 so the questions and everything else was when she was younger. I was like Janel…….I would put her in her highchair and get to braiding. Usually snacks, a movie or toys would help but if that doesn't then I would just take a lil break.

    But as my mother would say to me when I was little and as I use to tell my daughter,"the longer we take breaks and not get your hair done, the longer it's going to take for your hair to get finished." Once I say that she would say,"okay mommy, hurry up." LOL

  • Anonymous says:

    Ya'll good–never could cornrow, french-braid on myself–good thing I had a boy but years…I was blessed with my daughter and still can't but I can do a mean twist or coil–hahahaha!

  • Janel says:

    My daughter is 16 months old and I have to strap her in the high chair to do her hair. She does not like having her hair done. Her head is like a automatic joy stick every time I try to do it. When I see a toddler with cornrows or any elaborate style, I'm like "how on earth did you get your child to sit still?" I can barely get four ponytails in, and that's when I'm giving her snacks and everything she usually can't play with on her high chair tray. Le sigh..

  • Frankiefree03 says:

    Well, that's how my mommy used to braid my hair…she would wait till I fell asleep and then braid the most intricate styles in my hair… I may not have any children yet, but when I do my little cousin's hair, I wait till she falls asleep, and then finish…No complaints there. And she wakes up with a surprising new style!

  • Anonymous says:

    My daughter is 17 months and her hair is longer on the top and shorter in the back and on the sides, so we're stuck with either cut her hair to match the back, pigtails or cornrows until it grows in. Plus when I do her hair, she has the tendency to just get up and walk away… like its nothing lol its soooo annoying!! It doesn't take but 10-15 minutes if that to put 10 or 12 cornrows in her hair….if she's still, or sleep lol. Keep up the good work mommies!!

  • JaySpice says:

    I try to do my little bit's hair on the weekend so I can literally make a day out of it. I usually do with several breaks. It keeps me and the bit sane. For example, I'd braid the back half and give her (and me) a little half an hour break.

  • Nettie says:

    When my oldest was younger she could sleep when I did her hair, but her sister? OMG, she has ALWAYS hated having her hair done. They both have abundant manes, but the little one has inherited my tendency to tangle…if she ever wanted locs it would be no problem for her.

    I try to give some sort of braided style for the week on Sunday nights, but with two it's difficult to get up the mojo to tackle both heads. The little one rushes me (and cries BIG FAT tears every time I hit a snag), and the big one (she's 10) has reached the age where the style needs to be slightly more grown up. Either way, I'm committed to them, and their hair, wholeheartedly.

  • Anonymous says:

    aww this is so sweet. In grad school so no babies in the near future for me, but I can't wait to have mommy and daughter hair sessions. Your daughter's hair looks FAB!!!

  • Anonymous says:

    My son used to always sleep when I done his hair, would'nt sit still at all, so that was the only way to do it even though mummy looked like a zombie the next day with my bags under my eyes! when I had my daughter I was sure to only do her hair when she was awake. She's 3 now and does'nt mind getting her hair braided, I just put on some cartoons give her a hairband or clip and get on with it. Mind you she can't complain when she comes home with the contents of the sandpit in her hair two days after getting it done

  • Daphne74 says:

    Lord I wish I could get my little one to go to sleep after. I have resorted to the salon for those cornrows, my cornrow talent hasn't fully developed, but I am getting there. :)

  • Anonymous says:

    Wow! We truly share the same mommy woes: from the daughter's questions, to the mommy questions! My daughter also likes to add, "Ouch, that hurts mommy!" Even though, I detangling from end to root and being as gentle as humanly possible!! I must admit, I don't care for hair-do time in my house! But, it's always worth it after the struggle!

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