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Curly Nikki


By January 27th, 202164 Comments
Sjsafety18 writes:
@MissDaniBlue from twitter asked me what I thought of a girl who is natural dumping her boyfriend because he doesn’t like her hair. In typical SJS style, I said a few words.

CN Says:
Homeboy’s well versed. *tips hat*

“…explaining why you need him at 1 o’clock in the morning, to go out to Walmart and get you some Eco Styler Gel…” #dead


  • Anonymous says:

    Loved this video. Saw it on a friends facebook page. It is nice to have a man who supports you going natual -like my ex. He was all into it with me!!

  • Elegance says:

    Wow…why does he know so much about natural hair lol? I'm glad it's catching on and getting more support. I was on the bus a few weeks ago and a guy actually asked me if I was wearing a braid-out? I was! He said his sister was into natural hair. Great video! It should be sent to all boyfriends of natural, transitioning, or thinking about going natural women. I love it!

  • Anonymous says:

    Love this post! He needs to host a seminar for other Black men!

  • cygnet says:

    Just watched this. "Yeah, girl, I did the big chop twice: My hair and my boyfriend!" Hahahahahahahahahahahaha :-)!!!!! I like!

  • Janae says:

    Anon @ 8:29am really? A man posts an encouraging and positive video about natural hair, and you somehow find a way to bring in some negativity. Lemme guess….you're single too, right?

  • Anonymous says:

    Cudos to the woman who educated this brotha'! Damn, wish I had a daughter his age. j/k…sort of.

  • hairscapades says:

    Anon @ 8:29 am, his comment is two comments above yours. HIs ex is a YouTube natural hair guru, so that's why he knows so much. I know my boyfriend has gotten an earful. I think it shows that some men actually listen to us …. even when we ramble on about stuff that they could not care less about:). Or, what's even more endearing, is that some men actually start to care about what we care about, because they care about us:). I know my SO does and it's one of the many things that I love about him:).

  • Anonymous says:

    Oh my goodness, a man that knows that much about our hair is creepy! Okay, he is good looking and he does have an endearing personality plus but…. What is wrong with him, that he's spent that much time studying all of our hair care details? Did someone write him a script? Does he actually know all that from a women or watching Utube? He either needs a new hobby or a job!!

  • Unknown says:

    Wonderful & refreshing video.

  • sjs856 says:

    thanks you everybody for your kind words! i'm overwhelmed at the response my vid has received. my ex gf is a youtube hair guru (naw i wont say who but chances are most of u are subscribed to her lol) and i learned the majority of what i know from her. as far as the preferences go, 4a is what i prefer but MAKE NO MISTAKE, i will date a sista with ANY hair texture as long as her mind is right.. and she works out a lil bit… and she has a pretty face… and she loves the Lord lol but fareal tho, dont think for a second that im lookin at women in public judging them by how tight/loose their curls are! like its the deal-breaker! lol "Oh right over their, she cute. i think imma go and holla -AWWW nevermind. She 3a, cant mess wit her!" LOL

  • Anonymous says:

    @Doc I know what you mean about preferences! It's hard to say sometimes… but there is no getting around the fact that preferences are shaped by attitudes in the wider media/culture. So if "silky" straight hair is what is considered pretty in the mainstream than a lot of people are going to be influenced in that direction.

    I am biracial and have 3a/b hair but I agree that him saying his preference is 4a is refreshing. We don't hear that often enough. I have been natural all my life but thanks to the blogs and youtube I have learned to take better care of my curls (instead of just trying to get them to lay flat) and now I see women with 4a/b/c hair and I am like DANG!! I want THAT!

  • Calmcooky says:

    He is amazing and had some good points/tips…<3

  • luvmylocs says:

    i love it! made me smile!

  • Anonymous says:

    im in love with dude…he is so freaking cool…..great!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Anonymous says:

    Loved this!

  • Anonymous says:

    Love it! Thanks for sharing. Wish I could find a man like that! LOL!

  • Doc says:

    i loved this video

    now if he had said he preferred 3a hair, i would've been mad…so why am i okay with him preferring 4a hair.

    i've been struggling with the idea of preferences for a while now

    preferences are okay, right? maybe the problem is when preferences place value on a particular idea of beauty and condemns other forms. maybe that's when preferences are bad.
    i prefer men with supple lips and white teeth… so preferences are normal, right?

    i'm still working through all this 😉

    excellent post!

  • dvaaunaturel says:

    This young man is hilarious! Love this video. He is a keeper, for whomever he is with. His thoughts about supporting the mate and strengthening the bonds while transitioning, etc. Very well said.

  • Anonymous says:

    OMG WHO is this brother! I think he may be my new crush! my first time seeing his vids. such wisdom and humor all in one adorable package! need to also thank the sistas that were courageous enough give him the full view of this journey. love it

  • Unknown says:

    O.M.G! If I don't love this video!!! I am thoroughly impressed with his knowledge and courage to step up to the plate and lay that out there for both sexes! Love it!!!

  • Unknown says:

    Haha loved it "double big chop"!!!

  • L says:

    Too funny! I watched a few of his other videos….the one on Woman Let Him Watch the Game….HI-Larious!!!

  • Nichole says:

    He's hilarious. Okay, somebody has been checking out You Tube videos and maybe checking out more than just hair.

  • Joie says:

    NOICE NOICE NOICE. That absolutely works for me. It just works. He knows his ish

  • Raquell says:

    Two words … PLA YAH!!

    Men don't want to hear about all those details! LOL

  • Anonymous says:

    He is adorable…he speaks our language!!!

  • Anonymous says:

    Now that's what's up! Love, love, love the vid!

  • M says:

    he's a cutie and he knows what he's talking about! 🙂

  • Lady O says:


    This man right here….whew. LOVE his comment. It's so lovely to see a man accepting the natural sista AND he was dropping knowledge. SMH. And his accent..I loves me a man with a accent. Well foreign & southern accents haha. Thanks for sharing this Nik!

  • Anonymous says:

    That was AWESOME…now what I'd like him to do is shoot a video that talks to his fellow brothers who are still giving grief to their girlfriends and wives for their natural hair.

    He seems like he gets it…and what's even more beautiful is that his KIDS (regardless of their hair texture) will get it. Isn't that what it's all about…reprogramming ourselves and our kids?

  • Anonymous says:

    Oh I think i love him and he is funny…Love it!

  • Anonymous says:

    Ok… I think I'm in love.

  • Anonymous says:

    Geesh if I had a dime for the many men I met who were that educated and understanding on natural hair. Who is he and where is his number? haha

  • Anonymous says:

    I *heart* him! A lot of men need to see this video to learn how to support their women. Great video!!

  • Sophie says:

    haha! This guy is hilarious 🙂
    "I got love for y'all too" LOL

    However, I'm not sure about how much work I would put into explaining these things unless the relationship was really serious already. Fortunately for me, I am natural now and currently single so there's no transition talk to be had! Also, as some other posters said, my decision to go natural was not the result of a profound epiphany that I feel like I can testify about. I just thought "this is my hair"…

  • ABdS says:

    Two thumbs UP, Brotha!

  • hairscapades says:

    He lives in South Jersey and is single?!?!?! I'm from south Jersey and have a single natural 4a sister! I'm sending this to her NOW!! LMBO!!!


  • hairscapades says:

    OMGOSH, THAT WAS HEE-LARIOUS!!! I LOVE this video! I thought my S.O. was pretty good … he knows a few terms and is trying to coin a couple of his own (NHCI – Natural Hair Care Icon), has his own guest feature on my hair blog (S.O. He Says) and tells everyone he knows about it. But, when I show him this … I can just see him now, "I gotta get my game up!" LMBO!!!

    This was a post he did for my blog about me getting a protective style for the winter. I thought it was really cute:):

  • Anonymous says:

    Hilarious! I decided to go natural exactly when I started dating my current boyfriend, so my hair journey has tracked our romantic journey (now 16months)! As my hair has grown our relationship has grown too! What I appreciate most is his curiousity and openness to learn about my natural hair (while I'm learning too). It definitely has made the process easier and made me love him more!

    On the men who don't like natural hair, I think (sometimes) people are just afraid of what they don't know or understand. If your man isn't willing to learn/understand your choices, then that will be a problem- whether you're permed or natural.

    Anyway, really appreciate the humor and realness of this video coming from a man's perspective!

  • Anonymous says:

    Nice! Thanks for sharing Nik!

  • JaemiSu says:

    LOL Love this video!

  • Anonymous says:

    Ladies, Drew is single!!!! At least last time, I checked, LOL. He talks about that in his videos and how hard it is to find a quality woman in south NJ.

  • Bridget says:

    LOVE! LOVE! LOVE Drew! The man is well versed in natural hair terminology. Fortunately for me, my boyfriend loves my natural hair and is very supportive.

  • Anonymous says:

    Mmmmmmm, niiiice! This bro spittin out terminology and ish! LMBO! Love it! And yup, everything this brother said was right on target!

  • Anonymous says:

    Really. C'mon now, it's just hair.

  • Anonymous says:

    What an excellent video. I don't watch youtube videos but he was actually talking about something serious (to me anyway), in a not so serious way. Kudos!

  • bonni says:

    This video is HILARIOUS. Dead @ Aphogee reference.

    I transitioned for 28.5 months in a long term (6 year) relationship. I am in a new relationship as a full fledged natural. My only issues have been not wanting anyone to see me in the prep stages of a twist out or whatever and the time it can take to do my hair. I wore A LOT of WNGs this summer…lol! Oh, and the new guy "hated" long hair, but he has learned to like my MBL tresses!

  • Anonymous says:

    Is he married?! Damn!

  • Anonymous says:

    My husband is white and thinks it's awesome that I'm growing out my relaxer. I didn't realize he was really paying attention to my hair ramblings, until he began repeating exact names of products and what I use them for. It's very helpful to have a man who supports you on the days when the transition gets the best of you.


  • DiJah says:

    I gotta meet this brotha! lol not only is his accent sexy as hell!! he is hilarious! and he's speaking THE truth. Man, I gotta send this vid to all my male friends. Thanks for this one sir!

    P.S- you gonna go out @ 1 in the morning to get me some Ecostyler? haha!

  • Anonymous says:

    So true @Anon 3:56 – I had never laughed at pre-poo until I heard it today in the video.

  • Anonymous says:

    LOL! Loved him, truly hilarious!

  • Anonymous says:

    He knows all terminology and products lol. He said,"I'm a 4A man", I like this dude haha!

  • Alwina says:

    I love me some Drew! He's fun and he's real! And he knows all the terminology!

  • Anonymous says:

    Drew's videos are AWESOME! He knows how to talk to women and knows more terminology than a lot of people! Lawd, why can't I find a man like him!?!?

  • naturallyappealing says:

    LOOOVVE this guy!!! If I didn't already have a man who understands why I big chopped I would definitely be looking for this brotha! It is so refreshing to hear from a young, intelligent, openminded, black man on how he appreciates natural hair and the whole journey that we go through. Again, love this guy we (or better yet I) need to see more of him on this site.

  • Anonymous says:

    That was good. He know everything lol

  • Jeannette says:

    I think it's the environment that I live in because my 'going natural' was not a big deal to anyone I know. BUT I have heard some stories of Boyfriends being distasteful of natural hair. I think it's because they are brainwashed. I view people like Wendy Williams, Sherri Shepard and Tony Braxton who've said that their Son's like certain styles on them (usually the long flowing ones wigs/weaves). Every-time I hear something like that from Ladies who wear wigs/wigs as much as these celebs do, I often think of the message they are sending their Son's. It's no wonder why many Boyfriends dislike natural hair because the Women in their family never taught them about it and perhaps didn't know themselves.

  • Anonymous says:

    lol I never laughed at pre-poo until he mentioned it. It is funny

  • Mey says:

    I LOVE this post! Thank you sjsafety 18, thanx for posting this CN! I wish I had seen this a looong time ago. Great video, your humour is great, positive message.

  • Anonymous says:

    I really appreciate this man's perspective on natural hair and relationships.

    I met my man after I had been natural for over 10 yrs. He has been very helpful and supportive of the care it requires. I think it would have been interesting to have gone through a transition with a SO. On the one hand, it could be a way to become closer. If, however, your mate prefers something other than kinks/curls, I would imagine it could be very difficult to grow into your new hair without that type of support. The process of transitioning was such a steep learning curve (personal growth wise and hair care knowledge wise). To me, it was a deepening and somewhat spiritual process.

  • Casimiransmom says:

    This vid is interesting. Maybe I'm just different. My decision to go natural just wasn't that deep. I barely maintained perms anyway, and preferred braids for the fact that they were get up and go. So when I decided to just wear the hair out and no longer do perms, my husband was like, cool. It was never a big deal to me in the first place so it didn't become one to him. But I guess you need to decide if the relationship is one worth having the conversation with your man over and going through all the effort to convince him. You know better than anyone else.

  • Anonymous says:

    Loved this!

  • Anonymous says:

    My man loves me regardless of my hair. I told him, Im longer relaxing my hair and explain what it means and he said OK! I dont have the type of man who is so focused on the outside, he knows love me, scraf, rollers, bantu knots and twist. If I like it he loves it!

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