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Curly Nikki

Natural Hair Pet Peeves

By January 27th, 202150 Comments

Natural Hair Pet Peeves

I just want to get some thangs off my chest if I may please. I just have some re-occuring issues that make me wanna holler the way they do my life! I know you guys will be able to relate.

1. Bobby pins and I have a love/hate relationship. I take them for granted a lot. When they are in abundance I put them wherever I want. I ignore them whenever I see them laying around on tables, baskets, pockets and the floor. I just figure they will always be there for me until…they aren’t. Suddenly one day I can’t find them any where! It’s at those times when I need just ONE MORE FREAKIN’ bobby pin to complete my style when they want to act all mysterious and revengeful. The only ones that want to be available are the damaged, weak, missing a protective head, dollar store kind. Got me searching on my hands and knees, in the couch, in my purse…Gets on my damn nerves.

2. Or how about the times when I have had a long day. I’ve completed my nightly routine, my hair’s prepped and I go reach for my hair scarf to find it’s not where I usually put it. WTF!!! For nearly a half hour I am scrambling for my scarf, obsessed and angry. Until finally fed up, I opt to put a damn silk night gown on my head. Don’t you know the next morning I find that damn scarf balled up next to my pillow. Pissin’ me off.

3. Or how about when I create a dope hairstyle that everyone loves. I am patting myself on the back, excited that I have a new do to add to my arsenal until the next day comes and I want to recreate it. MISSION IMPOSSIBLE. It just doesn’t look the same! I am never able to duplicate the same hairstyle twice!

These are my top three most irritating reoccurring experiences. What are your natural hair pet peeves?


  • Hilary B. says:

    when i'm having a really good hair day, and I stay in the house all day. womp. It sounds silly but it feels like a waste, lol.

  • surVIVEr28 says:

    Knots and tangles after creating a fly style (My hair has a love/hate relationship with….wait for it…twists. Can u believe that?

    How about watching other naturals bust out their amazing styles as well as watching them mature as naturalistas and you are still in your "I-have-n-idea-what-to-do-with-my-hair-so-I-am-gonna-hide-under-these-two-french-braids-UNDER-the-hat" stage. LOL.

  • cygnet says:

    Oh, and the captchas on here! Trying to figure out if those are actual words in anybody's language. Yeah, it's related: They are on a natural hair blog, after all, right :-)?

  • cygnet says:

    1. I love my hair for as long as it's firmly attached to my scalp. The instant it becomes detached, it becomes gross. The more it clings to me, or to anything I'm about to wear, the more gross it is. And it never is more clingy than when it's wet. So detangling wet is an exercise in forcefully controlling my facial muscles so my face won't contort into one of those expressions your mom always warns you not to make for fear your face will freeze that way. Dry detangling fixes this for me.

    2. Sudden temperature changes in the shower while I'm rinsing my hair. I can barely stand cold water on my head; I draw the line at having it on my body at the same time. I wash my hair in a sink to avoid this.

    3. The mid-back section of my hair is the section I wryly call "the trouble zone". Whatever affects my hair negatively is usually going to cause trouble there first and affect it the worst. Alas, I haven't figured out what to do about that.

    4. Much appreciation and love to the naturalista who came up with the idea of flat braiding her nape hair to keep it from suffering damage and help it to grow. She posted a technique for this somewhere, and as I studied it, I saw that she had grown that hair to somewhere between shoulder and almost armpit length, if I remember correctly. If she is reading this, or if anyone knows the link to the technique I'm referencing, please post it.

    I've been fighting for the longest time with a small but pesky bit of nape hair on the left side of my head that insists on becoming the next Gordian Knot. I'm almost at the end of a takedown of some twists for which I varied this technique on my nape hair, flat twisting instead of flat braiding, but then plaiting the ends instead of continuing with a twist. It wasn't 100% successful; my hair slips out of twists and plaits generally, and slippage back there is beastly; but even taking slippage into account the technique worked much better than I expected. For tangly nape hair that is better about staying in place, I highly recommend giving this a try!

    But now, here's this: 1. I sweat a lot year round, but warm/hot weather is the worst :-(. 2. My scalp tends to suffer from some sort of dandruff and flaking which gets worse in warm/hot weather. Frequent cleaning seems to be the most effective thing I can do for this. 3. I've been thinking, and I would like to try lightly rinsing my scalp and hair 2-3 times a week, just to keep everything better hydrated than I have in the past. 4. My twists, which I deliberately put in quite loosely for comfort and ease of removal, tend to slip a-loose, as I already indicated, and washing with them in pretty much requires a retwist of at least half of them. So I've decided to try leaving my hair unbound for awhile.

    My hair tends toward high porosity, and I have been working to compensate for this by increasing my application of protein. I've noticed an improvement in its general condition since using Greek yogurt with vinegar and EVOO to deep condition and now AO GPB between times also. It's fine to medium in strand size and moderate to a little thick in density. I'm curious to know how this has worked for others with hair in a similar range, and how many new potential pet peeves I could collect by doing this. I'll gauge my success by the trouble zone. Hope me well :-)!

  • Unknown says:

    ALL OF THEE ABOVE!!! But i hate when my twist out looks weak/lame and not as fresh as how I thought it would. ugh!

  • j says:

    Oh and i hate how my black bonnets stain my damn pillows when i put them on my hair after spraying hair with water/oil mist at night ugh

  • j says:

    This is hilarious and soooooo true!!!!! I hate spending 6 plus hours putting two strand twist in my hair only to want to wash them out at the end of the first week and saying to hell with it in week to because I can't stand dirty ass scratch Yo head and find a surprise under your nail hair!

  • Unknown says:

    omg I here you girl! I'v had all those issues!!!! Great post!

  • Annie L. says:

    @ Anonymous 11:49

    –Goody Ouchless ComforTips no chipping, flecks, discomfort or upraised or lost tips for me EVER and I have some I've recovered from moving boxes from 2008. They're surprisingly flexible too with the same great hold and come in dark brown too. Just buy them and thank me later.

  • Kisha Michelle says:

    LMBO! Yes Yes Yes to the bobby pins and scarf. I haaate that. Once I wrapped my head in a silk camisol (sp). I was so mad in the morning when I was making my bed the stupid bonnet was right there under the covers….chilling when I lifted then back. I almost wanted to punch it.

  • Anonymous says:

    To anonymous at 11:49 March 14th.

    I have found that hair stylers and curl creams with containing "polyethylene glycol ester" or "PEG-" are notorious for dissolving the paint on hairpins. I have found that they also create a white "haze" on your nail polish while you're doing wet coils or twists.

    Purchase the BEST quality hairpins you can afford (Goody, et al) if you're going to use PEG- containing products in your hair.

    Buying a thrifty pack of 100 Sally Beauty Annie hairpins is not really a bargain if you won't use them because they flake and leave paint flecks in your hair.

  • Anonymous says:

    Bobby pins…. are there pins that dont leave black pieces in your hair, or show the silver metal in your hair, or dont snag my hair out?

  • Anonymous says:

    Loved this!

  • Spokenheart says:

    pet peeves for me is when i spill a brand new bottle of my fav product and have to go to back to using my less favorite product til i have time to get some more.

    I hate when i start setting my hair for a cute do and everything is going well and suddenly someone calls and I have to pause and go do something so one part of my hair turns out great and the other is like blah!

    I abhor when i'm walking around thinking im so fly, only to later find out that the back of my hair had been mushed down all day long and i was looking quite flat!

  • Anonymous says:

    I can relate to #3 on your list. I hate when I cannot recreate a hairstyle, too. Sometimes, I play around with my hair and come up with some creative hairstyles. But, the next time I attempt to wear my hair in that particular style again, it's a big FAIL! Also, I hate that it takes forever for my wash 'n gos to dry. I like to style my hair when it is soaking wet, because if I style it on damp hair, my curls tend to end up frizzy and not as defined.

    I love my natural hair, but sometimes I wish it would cooperate with me a little more! LOL!


  • Anonymous says:

    "Pet Peeve" solutions that have worked for me –

    1. Keep bobby and hair pins in a Gerber Baby food cup (saved one from a banana treatment)

    2. Save headbands and pony holders in a cloth bin. You can get 2/$5.00 at some discount stores

    3. Lost scarves. Process of elimination. a. Strip bed back. b. Look on floor beneath bed. c. Look in cloth bin where I store my pony holders and headbands. d. Look behind bathroom towel bar

    And my Numero Uno pet peeve is 3rd/4th day is gunky product balls in my hair!

    On day one I add oil to my twistout.
    On day two I fluff out with my dampened hands and may steam in the shower as needed.
    On day three it seems the product gets grainy when I steam or moisten it again, and I end up with all those grey gunky hair product balls!

  • Anonymous says:

    I have 10 satin bonnets. I moisturize and seal my hair every night and the bonnets absorb some of the water and oils, so I usually change bonnets every other night to avoid an oily odor because my husband's nose is close to my head when we sleep. I also put a drop or two of lavender essential oil in the mix because I want my hair to smell good and sexy.

  • Kudos says:

    I had to cover my laugh to keep from busting out laughing at work!! Sooo feel you about the bobby pins! I hate those busted ones missing a head, and they're always the ONLY ones you can find when you need it the most! And yes, I have definitely made up head scarves when I got too tired of looking!
    Loved this!

  • Anonymous says:

    This article is too funny!
    My pet peeve is when both my teen girls lose their scarfs, decide to use mine without telling me. I'm getting ready for bed wondering why I can't find my scarfs only to see my girls knocked out wearing mine…why those little hefers! Glad they don't know about my stash, but wait, maybe they do, that's probably why they not stressing looking for theirs…ARRGGGH!

  • Annie L. says:

    Me and bobby pins….*sigh* I love my Goody Ouchless Comfor-Tips and keep 3 hooked to my shirt neckline. I get quizzical stares but respond with a look that says 'I know not of the Narnia-hole that these things regularly disappear into and until you can recover the 8 PACKS of pins I've lost in the last 3 months, don't judge me!'

    After I gave up on scarves and bought a silk pillow case I found about 20 lodged in my sofa, with my socks, udner furniture, in retired handbags….

    With my twists or braids there's always 1 or 2 hairs painfully pulled in the wrong direction. I never notice until I'm completely finished, they're always buried deep or camouflaged and HURT because they're at the breaking point. So I'm in agony for the 10 minutes it takes me to angrily undo the entire style to find that 1 dang high-maintenance hair!

  • Anonymous says:

    Loved this!

  • Anonymous says:

    OMG I think that bobby pins have come together and formed a conspiracy to do this to all women lol!!…But my #1 is the two differnt textures of my hair (the back coily curly and the front wavy straight) ughhh and #2 pet peeve is my hair being so thin when it's wet that I can't do a twist out that will actually have body when it dries. I guess I just need to find a good natural stylist in my area!

  • MsPooh says:

    #2…Oh My Goodness! After you have looked everywhere for that scarf/bonnet…torn your bed up…cleaned under the bed…and still can't find it…go to bed after finding a less desirable alternative…then wake up with the dag-blasted thing right next to you?! *SCREAMS*

    And when I do my two-strand twists…as long as my hair is damp, the roots will lay down. As soon as it dries, the roots puff up…believe me, it looks crazy…and it ticks me off!

    And Shelli (hairscapades)…how about oil stains on every piece of paper…on my bed, on my nightstand, in my purse…on my desk at work (yes, I go to work tied up and do my 'do when I get there!)…from putting my scarves down anywhere near them! *SCREAMS AGAIN*

  • The Natural Hair Lady says:

    First off Shanti the misplaced scarf was scenerio is HILARIOUS! I thought I was the only one who went through that!!

    1. Talking to someone about natural hair or hair in general and they mouth the words, "Good Hair;" I say mouth because I totally blank out when they say it.

    2. That loose curly hair is turning into the new "perm"

    3. How natural will throw knifes at those who aren't natural. Let's show everyone LOVE ladies and let everyone do what they want to do.

    Follow me @naturalhairladi

  • braidsntwists says:

    #3 has always been my biggest pet peeve! I had a awesome hair day that I've never been able to duplicate since. It's so annoying!

  • Ashley Jane says:

    And let the church say a-man, a-man, and a-man! *shouts*

  • pinkgirlfluff says:

    Speaking of bobby pins I use the longer ones for most styles but it is an act of congress to find some anywhere but the most hood beauty supply store in the city. SIGH.

    I have to say no five million times to people selling all types of "do not wants" in the parking lot.

  • Anonymous says:

    1. Bobby pins will have me all down in the folds and under the seats of my car. Sometimes at night after I'm done w/my twist or braid outs, I'll just place them randomly in my hair so they'll be present in the a.m.

    2. No matter how many ouchless headbands I buy (i think 4 come in a pack) once i break the pack open, i may use 1 or 2 and never see them again.

    3. Prep your twist/braid out two days in advance of an upcoming hot date or special occasion. You excitedly take them out & you just can't get your hair how you want it!

  • Kay says:

    I'm loving all three! I also hate when I go to fix one section of my hair (maybe it frizzed up a little or is something funky) and then I end up magically messing up all the other sections and being forced to bun it up. -_- #thestruggle!

  • Anonymous says:

    My pet peeves:

    1) The neverending awkward length stage… I just want to be able to put my twists in a ponytail. Too much to ask?
    2) My hair is so thick, I need a bajillion twists for a twistout. Not 10 or 20.
    3) I've been recently rocking bantu knot-outs on stretched twistout hair. I've done the style a couple of times and gotten lots of compliments. I just knew I could really rock it on blown out hair for a wedding I was going to. I spent most of a Friday evening washing, DCing, blowing out, and bantu knotting my hair. I left the knots in through the next day, until an hour before the wedding. Don't you know when I took those things out, my hair poofed up so quick I couldn't grab the bobby pins fast enough. I had almost no definition. Thank God for bobby pins!

  • Anonymous says:

    Hilarious article!! I'm all of these plus the ones the ladies listed. But the scarf is numero uno. Mine is black and I usually throw it in my sock/underwear drawer. Problem is mostly everything in there is the same color and material as my scarf. Its impossible to find it.

  • hairscapades says:

    1) My hair NEVER air drying in less than 24 hours. Like, seriously, can a sister get an overnight set EVER?!?!

    2) That stray shed hair hanging out of my finished twist that won't come out without releasing and re-twisting (cuz if I snatch it, it's going to break other hair). And then, when I'm done, there's another one! Grrrrrrrr!!

    3) Paying shipping for products I can't find on the ground!! (Does that one count:)?)

    Oh, one more!! Oil stains on paper from putting my scarf in my purse!! LOL!!

    Shanti, in regard to your bonnet issue, girl, just buy about 20 bonnets/scarfs like me;). Then you'll always be able to find one:)!!


  • Anonymous says:

    Lawdhamercy I did not know other people had bobby pin issues like me. I cannot stand myhair falling down over my eyes, so I am constantly pinning it in various positions so it hangs long but doesn't blind me. I keep a bobby pin in my purse for emergencies and spend way too much time shopping for bobby pins that won't pull my hair out and throwing out any single bobby pin that snags my hair.

  • The Purse-a-holic says:

    I am soooo on number 1 LOL

  • Anonymous says:

    Lol you are sooooooooo on point with this alll of the above happen to me on a regular bases except the bobby pins found Way to deal with that BOUGHT ONE BIG PACK. Lol problem solved

  • Anonymous says:

    wowie! Where do I start???

    1. Watching a youtube video trying to recreate someone else's masterpiece and getting frustrated, fedup and sink into a low state of jump off the roof depression when it doesn't turn out like theirs. hah!
    2. Or how about when you worked on your hair so much for ONE dang night you think you can just throw a satin scarf (or old lady bonnet_I'm not ashamed to say I hav one…lol) on without re-twisting thinking that your 4a,b,or c hair will miraculously fall into place. NOPE! You take the bonnet off and it's STILL pasted to your head. Gosh-darnit-to-heck! (Nothing a spritz of water won't solve though. BUT STILL!)

    Those are my biggest one. Guess I'll be retwisting tonight. lol. Tootles!

  • PhenomenallyMe says:

    Doing something new in the regimen that works then forgetting the steps to the great hair! Ugh, frustrating!

  • Sophie says:

    LOLOL! These are so true! I definitely experienced numbers 1 and 2 this week. 1. I was doing a bobby-heavy updo and I was so out of pins I literally fished some out from the dust bunnies under the couch. 2. Upon cleaning my apartment, I found that my bonnet which had been missing for about 2 weeks was just balled up in a little shadow under my bed! Another pet peeve of mine is when I do my hair before putting my clothes on, only to realize that the shirt I want to wear is going to knock my hair all out of place, and similar to number three, it may not ever regain it's elusive glory!

  • Natural Sunshine says:

    LOL. This post is too funny. I can identify with # 1 for sure. Also when I try to pineapple my hair thinking the curls are going to look just like I left them the day before only to wake up with matted hair in desperate need of moisture.

  • Dallas says:

    Biggest pet peeve: when I'm having the BEST hair day and someone else appreciates it so much that they decide they have to touch it. Not only touch it, but rake their fingers through it while saying "I just love your hair!" My hair is a 'look, don't touch' situation!

  • Rhonda C says:

    I relate to all three especially #2 as I am coming at you from damn near under the bed looking for the friggin' scarf. Never mind, I have about 10 silk and/or satin scarves. I can't find THE scarf. Grrr……

  • Anonymous says:

    1. My hair is 5"-6" and I'm trying to learn protective styling so when I finally got a protective hair style right and by the 2nd or 3rd day my hair continuously falls out of the bobbie pins and by the time I have it together (30min later) I don't like it anymore. So I take it out to do a twist/braid out for the next day : p
    2. When I do flat twists or twists while my hair is wet and yes they're looking so good. Since it's late I'll go ahead and wrap my hair up only to wake up with hair looking smushed. It looks like scalp sucked my hair in while I was sleeping, What in the…! Thank goodness for my Scuncci head bands.

  • Jay-Jay says:

    I have the same pet peeves. I have 3 bobby pins right here on my desk and I have about 5 sitting on my bathroom sink. I know once I put them in the container, I will be going crazy looking for one that's just sitting around.

  • Anonymous says:

    YES AT NUMBER 1. I used bobby pins alot when I was relaxed and yes, since I ever started utilizing them alot, I've had the same experience. *shakes fists* It's a freaking conspiracy!

  • B. Heard says:

    Shanti, our hairpin experiences are the exact same! My relationship with hairpins is the biggest pet peeve ever!!! Your #2 is on the list as well!

  • Brittany says:

    1. the unraveling ends of my twists- This makes me want to scream!
    2. puffy roots
    3. When my hair wants to look its best… ON WASH DAY! (GRRRRRR! lol!)
    4. When it rains and my hair swells and then shrinks in on itself

  • Kay says:

    The first two! Most definitely! Jesus help me!

  • Anonymous says:

    My top 3 pet hairpeeves:

    1. getting the the gym for my sweatbusting workout only to find that I left my sweatband at home. not only am I gonna scare the heck out folk when the afro swells, but i will have sweat dripping all over my face.

    2. being adventuresome enough to try a new product for a twist out, go through all the shenanigans, only to wake up in the morning and look like a scarecrow.

    3. running out of a fav conditioner while butt naked in the shower.

  • Ashley says:


  • mims says:

    I always have backup hairpins stashed in my wallet….
    My pet peeve is the awkward length stage, will it ever end :'(

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