you ever heard of teens who physically cut their bodies as a way of
dealing with emotional pain? They are called cutters. They commit this
physical act of hurting themselves as a way to focus; thinking that they
won’t feel the emotional hurt if they are focused on the physical pain.
not always a logical connection, but in many ways adults can be cutters
as well–emotionally. Have you ever felt that “fight or flight”
emotion? Ever felt like there was something you needed to do, but
couldn’t get motivated to do it until you were backed into a corner? You
know—not getting your finances together until you’ve spent 6 months
close to being evicted from your apartment; or not getting a job until
you’re so severely in debt that it will take you years to climb out; or
quitting your job without having a new one because you feel like that
will force you to do the search.
off on making a change until the very last second is, in a sense,
punishing yourself emotionally–like a cutter would punish his or
herself physically. So how can you avoid getting to this point? With two
very important things: planning and patience.
out what your goal is, and then write down the logical steps to get
there. Give yourself a time limit: can you do this in a week? One year?
Five years? Set reasonable expectations for yourself and be adamant
about working consistently toward your goal. You won’t see progress
overnight but you will be able to track that change weekly, or monthly
or yearly—if you stick to it.
that’s where the patience comes in. Yes—you’re frustrated at your
circumstances, but knowing that you have a plan in place to change them
gives you the upper hand. When you’re feeling overwhelmed, just take a
look at how far you’ve come, and then update your plan; this gives you
something to focus on other than what’s upsetting you.
Have you ever felt like you were an emotional cutter? What other tools did you use to turn your frustration around?
is co-authored by Kim Jackson and GG Renee with the intention of
connecting with women through messages of self-love and personal
freedom. We believe that true beauty starts on the inside and
radiates outward, so maintaining emotional health and balance
should be an essential part of every woman’s beauty regimen. We
use this platform as an opportunity to share our personal
experiences, and to help other women who are seeking guidance to
find their own truths and live fabulously.