Wanna know why I’m happier than you?
‘Cause I choose happiness. It’s that’s simple.
Y’all know that one of my #LifeHacks is to smile. No matter the circumstance. Today, I’m reminding you of that, and telling you to take it one step further– choose happiness, no matter the circumstance. Choosing gratitude and joy no matter the situation may sound impossible or even ridic, but it’s actually no more difficult than reaching for your iphone. You can do it, you can actually choose happiness (yes, even in that situation!). You just believe that you can’t. And you know what they say about beliefs… whether you believe you can or you believe you can’t– you’re right. So why not pick an empowering one?
If you think of your life, the world, as a mirror, as a reflection of your beliefs (and thoughts and attitudes), and you find yourself surrounded by angry, dramaful, ratchet-ass circumstances, then what needs the fixin’? If it’s just a reflection, then isn’t it you (and your thoughts, beliefs and mood) that needs an adjustment?
Stand in front of a mirror and frown, or better yet, serve your resting bitch face (used to be my go-to). If you decided that you wanted to see a smile in that mirror instead, you wouldn’t try to change the face in the mirror (your reflection), you’d change the one on this side of the mirror. The world works the same way, we’ve just come to believe the opposite– that circumstances dictate our mood. Lies. Garbage (with a french accent). Your mood, your beliefs dictate the circumstances. This is how I live my life and besides the tremendous peace it serves up all day, my circumstances, my reflection, the world around me is pretty dope too. Effortlessly so.
Although you can simply make the choice today, I will share tips in future posts to make this more experiential for you. But for now, try this whenever f*ckery ensues (i.e. crazy boss, rude traffic, I-love-you-I-hate-you-I-love-you relationship stuff, finance-disrespecting bills, whatever and what have you)–
1. Take a breath and for a second or two, STOP. Just stop. No thoughts, no judgements, no stories about what’s happening (or should be happening) in that moment. Realize that before you think about it, absolutely nothing is wrong or lacking– it’s an entirely subjective experience and you can choose to define it (or not define it) however you wish. Ask yourself, ‘what’s wrong right now, if I don’t think about it?’ That moment of peace and realization will allow you to–
2. #ChooseChill You can either (a) frame the situation in a positive way (everything is working out for the best, etc.), which is cool, but can be clumsy and feel forced, or (b) remove yourself from the situation (if you can) and do something that shifts your mood (listen to trap on your way to work, take a walk, call momma, pray, meditate, dance about it), or (c) do like me and remember… remember to remember that the shenanigans can be viewed as a reflection of your beliefs and mood. And then smile. When I see crazy stuff now, it makes me happy because I remember to remember. It’s a trigger to remind me to SMILE… to feel good now. And the more you feel good now, the more you’ll see reflections of stuff in the world that will actually make you smile!
If you don’t know how to feel good for no reason, ask God to show you. Happiness, peace, bliss… that’s your default state… it’s why feeling crappy, feels… crappy. It’s who you are. Just feel good and watch everything around you (the reflection) mold and shift to the new you. #DontBelieveMe #JustWatch
p.s. Need help remembering? Download an interval timer app to your phone and set it to go off throughout the day. When you hear it, smile and choose happiness. It’ll feel fake until it doesn’t. I’m living proof.