“Remember what I said to you yesterday about Listening? You’ve been Listening. I can tell. I know.”
Sister Grazielle said it was my ‘aura and openness’ that got her attention this past week, seeing me at the church and around the grounds.
After briefly explaining what I do and how I can’t become a nun because I have small children, she said, “You and me are the same, in different situations. The Holy Spirit does your work. You just Listen. He does my work. I just Listen. We can’t forget that. When we die, St. Peter will ask us all the same one question— ‘how much did you Love?’ whether you’re a doctor, a bishop, a nun, or a podcaster… how much did you Love?’”
“God has no eyes, no arms, so He uses us. He uses our hands. He uses our mouths like Isaiah. He puts words into your mouth if you Listen.”
On Experiencing the Presence
I asked her if she hears words or feels a feeling (like I do), and she said that she “hears in the ear of her Heart… we put ourselves into His Presence, that’s how we Listen…a contemplative attitude all the time.”
Every time she touched my shoulder or my forearm as she explained, BLISS. Calm, gentle, waves of Bliss. Her words flowed effortlessly, her presence was His.
She said to see every job as “the Lord is calling me!” She smiled big. “When I see trash on the ground and I’m in a hurry, I slow down and stop to pick it up saying, ‘the Lord is calling me!’ When you have Love of the Lord you can make a sacrifice, you can do all work, no matter what it is, with Love for Him. Just always be aware of him in every work and pray before you start anything!” I tried to launch into my litany of questions when we first sat down, and she stopped me and looked away, eyes closed, and said, “first, we pray.”
She said if you Love God with the same flavor of Love you feel for a boyfriend or girlfriend, you will Love everyone automatically. If you Love God, you Love His children. “When we love God, it’s not just for Him, it’s for everyone.”
I told her I had always been hesitant to take up my cross and follow Jesus because of all of the tragic stories of suffering I’ve read from the saints and other holy people. I asked how to get past this fear. She smiled knowingly and said, “We need it. It’s a purification for us. When you suffer, it’s like you empty yourself and you can feel that you are taking on some of the suffering of the world as a service…sharing in Jesus’ suffering as a small sacrifice. Just offer your suffering to Him. Also when you have a grateful heart, know that it won’t feel like suffering.”
On Discerning His Will versus Our Will
I asked her how to tell our will from His, and she said, “you can answer that. We all can. When we do our own will it is limited. We can’t help but make mistakes. Our Love becomes deformed. You want praise and other people to praise you. When it’s His will, you don’t have any ‘want’. you don’t need praises, you don’t need recognition, it’s natural. Like giving gifts from the heart, you don’t need or want anything in return. When you give gifts with love it’s different. When you live from His Will, it’s different. You can feel it. When I make decisions I ask the Lord, ‘is this your will?’ And listen. Then I do everything I can and at the end I say, ‘Lord I did my best and I know you will do the rest.’ And he does. Every time. Tell God, ‘I trust you… no machine can destroy what you Will for me.’ And when you succeed, don’t act surprised! Know He did it!”
Repetition and Prayer
I asked her about praying the Rosary. She said she uses it to attune herself. And as she’s speaking her eyes are closed and she’s moving her hands in a flowing circular motion in front of her body and she’s rocking gently (like we do!). She said saying the same prayer over and over, “you become a part of the prayer… when you’re praying, your mind is with the prayer only and you put yourself into it. It’s not how many times. It’s attunement. The Rosary is the companion of the gospel. It contains the whole mystery of Jesus.”
I asked her about which name of Jesus she most loves (Yeshua, Easho, Yesu, Ieso, etc) and she said, “We are only for, and of one God. No need of explaining or trying to figure it out. We have a deep connection. We are all calling the same One whether we know it or not (no matter the religion). We are all sons of Abraham.”
When I asked her about when she heard The Call, she said she was 12. Up until then she wanted to be a soldier! She said the Lord changed it at 12 years old. “ If you name what is in your heart you can take the action and it will happen. Pray. When in doubt pray. Ask the Holy Spirit. He will stir your heart and you will know what to do.”
She told me to tell you that she loves you.
I love you, too,