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Insecure Got Us Wondering If Your New Boyfriend Can be Your Ex?

Insecure Got Us Wondering If Your New Boyfriend Can be Your Ex?
Jay Ellis

By Mwabi Kaira

A petition floated around the internet demanding that Lawrence return to Insecure when it was assumed that he wouldn’t appear on Season 3. Team Lawrence championed hard and fans of the show were pleasantly surprised when Issa ran into him at the 7-11 while she was at Coachella. Lawrence has been on every episode since then and his story line has been interesting to watch. To get over Issa he got on top of a lot of women, and a visit to the doctor scares him right on over to Church. Although both Issa and Lawrence have moved on and agree that friendship is the best thing for them right now, this week’s episode has them getting coffee and reminiscing and we are reminded of why they worked when times were good. The episode ends with viewers wondering if they’re going to give their relationship one more shot.


Insecure Got Us Wondering If Your New Boyfriend Can be Your Ex?
Nathan & Issa

I want to be excited for them but I love how open Issa is with her new Boo Nathan; she really shows up as her whole awkward self and Nathan accepts her just as she is. Let’s be clear, I’m mad at Nathan for appearing to be the perfect boyfriend then disappearing without explanation and putting Issa through such unnecessary changes. Had Nathan not ghosted Issa she would not be sharing time and space with Lawrence and reminiscing about their good times together. The same goes for Lawrence, his scare, and newfound salvation search. If they hadn’t happened he’d still be mad at Issa. Issa and Lawrence default to the familiar because they know how it feels and it is safe. Accepting that Nathan has possibly walked away after awakening something in her she didn’t know she possessed, is a hard pill for Issa to swallow. Lawrence tries to do what his boys do and wild out but it has never worked for him and he prefers to be a one-woman man. When things with Issa were good they were really good and he yearns for that again and not this mess he has created for himself.

Is it possible to get back with your ex after so much bad history is shared? The simple answer is absolutely, but only if you are both willing to do the work. No one wants to be kept in the prison of their wrongdoing by having it be brought up all the time. Since cheating was involved, getting trust back will be an issue for them as well. Couples get back together all the time but major conversations have to be had to get through the hump. On one hand, you know exactly what works for you both, but on the other hand, you’re signing back up for those things that bothered you to the nth power that may have been kicked up more notches since you’ve been apart.

Insecure Got Us Wondering If Your New Boyfriend Can be Your Ex?
Issa & Lawrence

Am I here for Issa and Lawrence 2.0? I can’t see them shutting out the noise that will come from their friend circle. It will be cute for a minute and then the moment one of them comes in late, accusations will fly. Yes, I’m a cynic but I have lived and learned and seen it all. Unless couple therapy is involved, I don’t see it for them. They became better versions of themselves while they were apart for a reason. Issa would have never had the courage to quit her job and follow her dreams if she hadn’t met Nathan. Lawrence would have never manned up and gone after the great job he has now and gotten his house had he stayed with Issa. It’s not either of their fault, they just got in a relationship rut that they couldn’t climb out of. They decided to end things after trying everything to salvage it. Coming together now only because they’re confused is just another very insecure twenty-something moment. Getting back together for the wrong reasons is never a good idea.

Insecure’s season finale will air on September 30 at 10:30 PM.

Should you go back to an ex once you’ve moved on?
Insecure Got Us Wondering If Your New Boyfriend Can be Your Ex?
Kaira is an African girl navigating her way in an American world.  She
is of Zambian and Malawian heritage and moved to the USA in 1993. 
Writing has been her passion since she could put a sentence together on
the page. Mothering her sons is her pride and joy.  She has been an avid
runner since 2013 and has run 10 half marathons and a full marathon. 
Keep up with her at

One Comment

  • Wholsome says:

    My ex was lying to me from the beginning of the courtship,i never knew he was also dating other two girls who happened to be my colleagues.i was able to find out the truth through a cyber genius 'hackingloop6@ gmail . c om'',who hacked his phone and gained me remote access to all his phone activities.I'm happy the relationship never made it to the altar though.You can also contact 'hackingloop' on + 1 (612) 502 – 3647,if ur partner's commitment is in doubt.  

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